Drunk and Crazy by Mogwai hits, and the fans hold up their signs. "SEND SETH BACK TO JAIL," "THE CAMERAMEN HAVEN'T FOCUSED ON OUR SIGNS IN FIVE YEARS," "LOGAN MADE ME A SAD PANDA," "BRING BACK LAWNMOWER JONES," "REB FEARS MCFLY," and confusingly, "I JUST WANNA FLY." Anyway, we go to Zach and Shannan.
Zach Davis: Welcome to Slam! I barely know where to begin.
Shannan Lerch: Stuff is crazy. Let's see here. Oblivion and Famine of the Vile have officially joined forces as Monsters Inc., presumably with Nathan von Liebert, but not officially. They've kidnapped Pantheon's Nightmare, Kid Phantasm's girlfriend. The leader of Pantheon, Jonny Fly, fought Logan last week... in which Logan simply walked out, giving up. Kinda like the last time he tried to get me to orgasm.
Zach Davis: We've also got the Big Dick Superstars, with Chad Evans having a guarenteed World Title shot at Ultimate Showdown. Reb and Kira Sakazaki get a Tag Titles shot, and Reb seems to be.. from the future.
Shannan Lerch: Then you have Future Gods, Inc. And lastly, the Dark Side has officially reformed, with Bishop and Priest once again aligning with Gravedigger. Stablemania is running wild here in WCF.
Zach Davis: And two of those stables collide in our main event. The Future Elements, Kid Phantasm and Jeff Purse, face Nathan von Liebert and Oblivion. We'll see if NvL is truly aligned with Monsters Inc. or not.
Shannan Lerch: Who cares? I just want to see if poor Kid P gets his girlfriend back. I love a good love story.
Zach Davis: Personally, I'm glad she got kidnapped. Ever since Bobby Cairo kidnapped Lonnie, I've always wanted to see him being on the receiving end of this kind of thing.
Shannan Lerch: Speaking of, Bobby's former protege Chad Evans is in action with fellow Big Dick Superstar Kira Sakazaki.. and JAY WILLIAMS of all people.. against Sarah Twilight and the ToT team, FPV and Doc Henry.
Zach Davis: Both Evans and GEKIDO have had some unkind words for Miss Twilight in recent times, so they'll be gunning for her, for sure. Meanwhile, FPV has a World Title match coming up, so he has a lot going for him as well.
Shannan Lerch: Big singles match, Johnny Reb up against Ayria Adams. Like we mentioned earlier, we'll see Reb and Sakazaki against Twilight and Adams at Blast, so this is a warmup for that.
Zach Davis: TV Title rematch! Orbit once again facing Odin, but this time Odin is the Champ, after Orbit practically gave the Title away last week. We'll see how tonight's match goes.
Shannan Lerch: In a First Blood match, Bishop meets Tommy Kain. Kain won in a tag match against Bishop and Priest last week, which brought this about.
Zach Davis: Tek and Jonathan Jakobs are going one on one, with Eric Price as the ref. Price and Tek have had an interesting dynamic throughout their time here in the WCF, and Jakobs kind of attacked Tek out of nowhere, not too sure what the hell that was about.
Shannan Lerch: Apathy, Stuart Slane, Adam Young and Hunter Valentyne are in a four way match. Valentyne and Apathy have a complicated relationship, to say the least... we'll see how that plays out in the ring.
Zach Davis: And I don't believe I'm saying this, but word going around is that ADAM YOUNG VERSUS COREY BLACK is confirmed for Blast. Wow.
Shannan Lerch: With the condition that Adam Young MUST appear at XIII. Unbelievable.
Zach Davis: Waylon Cash is facing Hardcore McMurderkill, the newest man to be managed by Blake Updegraff IV. I feel like this may be a trap, but we'll see. Cash has been continuously humiliated by Future Gods Inc., I hope for his sake this isn't another case of that.
Shannan Lerch: And in our opener, JAM WILLY JESUS is back! I love that name. He's up against El Coolo. I love that name too.
Zach Davis: But first, we're scheduled to hear from the one and only.... Logan.
Metallica “The Struggle Within” hits the speakers and Logan steps out from behind the black curtain to a surprising heavy mixture of boos and ‘Logan Sucks!’ chants. He skips usual stage antics, opting to be calm and curiously study the audience.
Zach Davis: Logan not getting a lot of love here tonight.
He then shakes his head and starts to walk down the ramp, reaching the apron and rolling underneath the bottom rope and popping to his feet inside the ring. The music fades out and he continues to eye the negative audience.
LO – GAN SUCKS!
LO – GAN SUCKS!
LO – GAN SUCKS!
He slowly approaches one side of the ring and signals for a microphone which is immediately handed to him. He raises the talking instrument to his mouth yet is interrupted further by the arrangement of boos and chants.
LO – GAN SUCKS!
LO – GAN SUCKS!
LO – GAN SUCKS!
They finally quiet down and he speaks into the microphone.
Logan: Yeah… I get that. I’m the bad guy, somebody who phrases treachery in every other sentence probably shouldn’t be cheered. I don’t care what you people think. I never have. I didn’t care what your parents thought when they booed me before I could say one word in WCF and I especially do not care if the boudle spawn boos me now. You’ve booed, you’ve cheered, but above all else… we’ve always had a good time.
He pauses letting that seep in for a second.
Logan: However.. last week wasn’t a very good time was it? No. Right here in this ring I gave Jonny Fly..
The audience pops for the mention of his name.
He shakes his head and then proceeds.
Logan: I gave Jonny Fly a Connector, handed him over a ticket, shoved it in the trashcan and shut the lips on that Flygina for the one, two… wait. I said the one, two..
He appears a little confused, hesitating to speak back into the microphone.
Logan: One, two, three? No.. he kicked out. Well, that’s fine, smooth as a babygurl’s ass. It’s not the first time someone has managed to kick out of a Connector. Well, it is about as rare as a Jay Price World Title regime lasting longer than a Sarah Twilight period… but it can happen. SO, I do what any other Ticket Master of Treachery would do… I gave him ANOTHER Connector. And, once again.. he kicked… out…
The arena fills with…
JON – NY FLY!
JON – NY FLY!
JON – NY FLY!
Logan squints his eyes in a near look of sickness and slowly nods his head.
Logan: Right then and there while I was sitting on the mat and looking at this man who just threw two tickets back in my face… I realized something. You know what that was? H’m? What am I doing? That’s what I was thinking. This guy might not openly acknowledge it but he obviously HAS to beat me. I don’t have to beat him, no, he HAD to beat me. There’s no other way of looking at it. Where do I even benefit from defeating Jonny Fly? I don’t. Another world title victory, sure, but when you really read the fine print… Jonny Fly had everything to gain by defeating me and in return it would mean absolutely nothing for me to defeat him. And then I started thinking, yes, this man is a hell of guy.. hell of a guy.. been here eight months and done nothing but take boudles out left and right. That train is running full steam. Choo-choo, boudle, choo-choo!
He paces the ring a bit before continuing.
Logan: Do you think that little train with the Flygina caboose is going to be choo-chooing twelve years from now?
Logan: No. However, my train, the train of treachery, the train of WCF, the train of history making after history making… has. So, after all these years you booing assholes expect me to come out here and give that new up and comer the final push that he needs to WCF greatness. Like I said there is nothing in it for me defeating Jonny Fly, that was his match and he might have died right there in the ring trying to win it.. why should I have to fight tooth and nail for somebody who probably isn’t going to be around next year? Huh? Another Slickie T, another PC Cradle, another Jack of Blades, another TORTURE… somebody who’s going to make a big splash and then.. haul ass!
The audience boos.
Logan: Then maybe a few years from now we can see the great Jonny Fly make a random appearance and return to special referee a One match. The mystic Jonny Fly, oh, how exciting. But let’s face it, here’s the fact of the matter, here’s the truth – every year or so we get a Jonny Fly. They’re hot, they’re on fire, and then eventually a match with me falls into place. I’m always the guy to take these one hit boudles to their absolute limit and more or less solidify another guy who came and went into the great ‘true’ legends of WCF history. And you know why I’m that guy? Because I’m Logan. The man that has single handedly won every big event, title, or impossible match in this company that is even worth a damn to win, time and time and time again. I’m the person you HAVE to beat to officially be considered a true force here. I’m the absolute test. I’m the guy that no longer had anything left to prove to this company YEARS AGO. I’m the guy who had a prime, then had a better prime, and then a better prime and now I don’t even know any more if I was better before or better now. So here I am, here I’ve been, and do you know why I walked out on Jonny Fly versus Logan? It’s because you boudles don’t appreciate my presence anymore and you would whether cheer a guy who is going to be long gone in a year. It just keeps happening over and over, the same cycle. I’m the only thing that has stayed in the loop the last twelve years, it’s always a different face but it’s ALWAYS going to be Logan that they HAVE to beat. Am I complaining? No, no, this isn’t a compliant. This is a time for you people to really open your eyes. If you can’t appreciate or recognize exactly what I am then why in the flying fuck am I going to continue to put this people over that ALWAYS end up leaving and you ALWAYS seem to have a deeper respect for. You see, here’s the damn truth… if I retired in 2006 after once again doing what NO ONE else had done, winning the second War, and winning a fourth WCF title, and then just disappeared and NEVER EVER showed my face here again. You know what I’d be by now? Fuckin’ Big Foot, Elvis Presley, more mystic than ole Nessy. Nobody is ever any match for their own legend. But no, I stuck around, put up six more years of more classics, and now.. maybe.. you’ve all became spoiled. You’ve gotten too much of Logan. Do you see what I’m talking about? I’ll tell you this, I recognize a quick kick in the nuts when I see one, and I’m no longer contributing to these boudles any more just so you can cream your pants and worship them when they leave just as fast as they came.
A look of surprise comes across the face of Logan as “When Worlds Collide” by Powerman 5000 hits the speakers and the arena instantly fills with boos at the music of The Dark Side. Bishop and Priest step out from the back followed by Gravedigger. Logan’s look turns to that of annoyance as his archnemesis stands on top of the ramp. Both men lock eyes with each other and have a staredown contest for a few seconds. The pyros and fireworks light up the ramp and Gravedigger doesn’t even flinch as he continues to stare down Logan. Gravedigger, Bishop, and Priest start walking down the ramp. Gravedigger circles around the ring as Bishop and Priest step up to the side of the ring. Both men pull themselves up simultaneously onto the apron and step over the top rope. Gravedigger is handed a mic and rolls into the ring on the other side of Logan. Logan prepares himself for a fight as he ends up surrounded by all three members of The Dark Side. Gravedigger holds his hand out as he lifts the mic.
Gravedigger: Easy, Logan. Destroying you isn’t really the main reason I came out here.
Logan relaxes slightly but still doesn’t completely trust Gravedigger. Gravedigger glares at Logan.
Gravedigger: I came out here to tell you something, Logan. I came out here so everyone could hear this. I sat back there and listened to you during the last few minutes and honestly I couldn’t take anymore of it Logan. From one veteran to another. From one Hall of Famer to another, even through all that we’ve been through, I couldn’t take it anymore.
Logan looks at Gravedigger curiously.
Shannan Lerch: Well this is completely against Gravedigger’s character.
Gravedigger: Logan, I couldn’t take it anymore because after seeing what transpired last week on Slam, I have to say that….Logan….YOU DISGUST ME!
Logan gets a pissed off look on his face as the crowd boos a little. Logan steps forward and lifts the mic.
Logan: You watch your mouth, Digger!
Gravedigger: What did you say to me?
Logan: I said, you wat---
Gravedigger: SHUT UP! Shut your trashcan mouth, Logan!!
Logan looks confused and starts to say something, but is interrupted by Gravedigger.
Gravedigger: Yeah, how’s it feel to be on the other side of a shut up and a trash can insult. Logan, you’re going to shut your mouth and listen to what I have to say here, because if you don’t, Bishop and Priest here will shut it for you long before Doc and FPV can get down here.
Logan glances back over his shoulder at Bishop and Priest who tower over him. They have their arms folded and smirks on their faces as they look down at Logan. Logan turns around to Gravedigger.
Gravedigger: As I was saying, Logan. You disgust me after that performance last week. What the hell was that?! Fly kicks out of a couple of moves and so you just turn your back on the ring and walk out, giving him the win? We both know that Seth isn’t going to say it and if he does it’ll be forever before he gets around to it, so I’m going to say it now. Logan, you’re a disgrace to WCF. You’re a disgrace to the title of veteran, to the title of Hall of Famer. You call yourself Mr. WCF but then you pull that garbage like you did last week. You call yourself Mr. WCF and then you stand here tonight and talk on the mic about how you don’t feel appreciated and how the fans don’t care for you and all this other ridiculous bullshit. You want to call yourself Mr. WCF, you don’t get to do it based on stipulations. You don’t get to sit there and decide which matches you’re Mr. WCF and which ones you’re not.
Now, I’m sure everyone back there in the back and those in the audience and watching on TV are wondering why in the hell they’re watching Gravedigger give Logan of all people a pep-talk. The thing is, I’m not out here giving you a pep talk. I’m out here because as a fellow veteran and fellow Hall of Famer here in WCF who is still active, I’m lumped in with you. When you walked away from Jonny Fly last week, you made yourself look like a coward. You made me look like coward. You made me look bad just like you did yourself. You know what? They’re right when they called you a coward.
Logan is getting really pissed off.
Gravedigger: Logan, unlike you, I’m not a coward. You stand there and you talk about the new blood that comes in, how you’ve watched people come in and wow the crowd and get huge support from them only to leave for countless different reasons a few months later. You talk about how you have nothing left to prove, but that’s a lie. For me, every match is me proving that I’m the best in this company. The ultimate way of proving you’re the best in WCF is to win the world title. You had the chance to do that last week. Yeah, so he kicked out of two Connectors. Do you honestly think he was going to make some huge comeback after taking your finisher twice? I doubt it. He was nothing more than one more finisher or slipup from losing the world title a second time.
I don’t care how many Death Drivers, Respectos, Gringo Stretchers or Grave Markers it takes to put someone down. I do what it takes to get the job done and I get the three count, Logan. I don’t have some preset amount of effort I put forth in a match where if I can’t win at that point I walk out. That’s the difference between me and you. You talk about Slickie T, Torture, and PC Cradle. You know, if this was any one of them and you did that, you might not see me out here, but no. You walked out on Jonny Fly. Some guy who wasn’t even here a year ago. You let him walk away with the world championship.
At the end of this month, I’ll be in the main event at Blast against Jonny Fly for the world title. Oblivion will be in the match, too, as well as ToT member FPV. The thing is Logan, I’m going into that match with a limitless supply of Death Drivers and every other move in my arsenal. I’m going to do WHATEVER it takes to win the match and once again be the world champion. Yeah, like you I don’t need this title. I don’t have to have this title. We both have mile-long accomplishments here in WCF. I’m going to go into Blast and win the world title. I’m going to win the title no matter if these people respect me or not. Why in the world do you even care what these people think? I have only cared what they thought for a brief moment when I first donned the mask as Hector Rodriguez. That ended quickly and I put the fans in their place where they belong, behind me. I wrestle for myself. I win for myself.
Logan, I was going to come out here and talk all this smack and then whip your ass, but I’ve decided since then that you’re not even worth the effort it would take to bury you here in front of everyone. How about you go back to how you were in 2009 by eating a shit ton of hotdogs and peddle your DVDs again?
Logan has had enough.
Logan: SHUT UP!! You shut your trashcan mouth, Boudledigger!
The crowd pops a little even though they hate both men. Gravedigger grins and lifts the mic.
Gravedigger: I’d tell you to shut my mouth yourself but you’d probably just walk away like the little bitc—
Gravedigger is interrupted as Logan lunges forward and decks Gravedigger. Gravedigger is taken off guard and stumbles backwards. Logan and Gravedigger start trading lefts and rights. Bishop and Priest step forward and the three men start attacking Logan when FPV and Doc Henry come running down the ramp and slide into the ring. All six men start fighting with each other in the ring and the crowd is going crazy.
“Master of Puppets” by Metallica starts playing and Seth walks out from the back, mic in hand. He jogs to the ring as he speaks.
Seth Lerch: Guys, guys! Stop it! HEY!!
Seth Lerch climbs into the ring and gets into the middle of everything. He gets hit a couple of times but eventually all six men stop fighting. Seth turns to Gravedigger and Logan back and forth calming them down. Both men look like they want to tear into each other.
Seth Lerch: Yeah, I couldn’t believe my eyes when I thought I saw Gravedigger on TV giving a pep talk to Logan either but Logan, I have to admit that Gravedigger made some great points just now.
Logan looks at Seth and starts running his mouth at him.
Seth Lerch: Logan you walked out on WCF last week. You walked out on a world title match. You walked out on a world title match with Jonny Fly and Gravedigger made a great point with that. You didn’t walk out on some legend or veteran or fellow Hall of Famer. Logan, you walked out on Jonny Fly. Logan, look around you here in WCF. Look at what’s going on right now: it’s chaos. This isn’t the era of Jonny Fly like people would have you believe. This is the era of the New Blood here in WCF. With the exception of one title belt we currently have here in WCF, they’re all being worn and defended by new blood here in WCF. By people that have only been here a few months, if not a few weeks. Here in the ring right now, I’m standing with 6 men who are veterans here in WCF. You’re of the old guard. There’s only a couple of other men not standing in this ring right now who are also in WCF that have been here for years. Not a damn one of you is wearing a title belt.
Logan, when you walked out on the world title match last week, you walked out on all that I spent years building. You walked out on your fellow veterans here in WCF and officially told the new blood here in WCF that they were better than any veteran. You told those guys who mention Gravedigger on their Twitter accounts each week that they’re better than him and every other veteran when you walked out. It is your job as a veteran and Hall of Famer in WCF to destroy each and every newcomer who comes into WCF and advances far enough up the ladder to call themselves the greatest.
I’m standing in the ring with The Dark Side and the Team of Treachery. Two of the most well-known factions in WCF history. Two factions that are still thriving all these years later, but the thing is both groups are no longer swimming in a sea of fellow veterans and people who have been here for a long time. You’re surrounded here in WCF by dozens of new people. New people who hold all your titles. New people who can proclaim that they are WCF’s present and future. You think I want that? Yeah, I love the money they bring me, but you think I want to be booking people in the big matches who didn’t even help build WCF to what it is today?
Seth lowers the microphone and looks back and forth at both groups.
Seth Lerch: You know, this might sound crazy, but it’s just par for the course here in WCF lately, but I think it’s time to make history here in WCF. Gravedigger, you and The Dark Side are a force to be reckoned with. You’ve proven that for years now. You just may win the world title at Blast and become a four-time world champion also.
Seth turns to Logan.
Seth Lerch: And you, Logan. The Team of Treachery is also a force to be reckoned with and you’ve proven that each time you’ve formed the group. Your group might also win the world title at Blast if FPV is successful. But see, that’s the thing. Gravedigger you MAY win. FPV you MIGHT win. There’s no guarantee. Or even Oblivion could win and take the title to Monster’s Inc. Or the most horrible thing could happen that Fly beats all of you and retains the title.
SCREW THAT! Logan, Gravedigger, FPV, Doc Henry, Bishop, Priest. All six of you, it’s your job as veterans here in WCF to destroy all these new people here in WCF and keep them in check. You six are veterans here in WCF, not just because you’ve been here a long time, but because you’ve all proven yourselves in various ways here in WCF. Yet all six of you have just sat there on your asses and not done a damn thing while the newcomers have taken over MY COMPANY!
Gravedigger steps forwards and grabs for the microphone. Seth pulls it back and steps back from Gravedigger.
Seth Lerch: Yeah, yeah, Digger. I know what you’re going to say. You held the hardcore title for months and then you got to the finals of the Trios tournament. You still don’t have a belt around your waist right now do you? You’re still not fighting a bunch of newcomers each week. You know what you are doing? Since you came back in December, aside from the Trios tournament, you sat there fighting with the Team of Treachery and Oblivion while all the new blood here in WCF just passed you by and took control of the place.
Logan smirks at Gravedigger.
Seth Lerch: You were just as responsible, Logan. I can sit here and launch into you about what you've done since you returned as well, or I can even bring up last week if you want. Like I said a couple of minutes ago, it’s time to make history here in WCF. I think it’s time for WCF’s first real SUPERGROUP here in WCF.
The crowd starts murmuring. Gravedigger and Logan turn to Seth.
Seth Lerch: Yeah, I know you all hate each other, none more than Logan and Gravedigger you hating each other. You hate each other because you are so much alike and you’ve both accomplished so much here in WCF. You’ve spent your entire careers trying to outdo one another. I think it’s time for something monumental here in WCF. I believe it’s time to bring together two of the biggest factions in WCF HISTORY! It’s time to bring together The Dark Side and the Team of Treachery!!
Logan and Gravedigger both get in Seth’s face and start arguing with him.
Seth Lerch: Whoa whoa back off. You both need each other. Logan, The Dark Side has the power and might that the Team of Treachery lacks. No one can bring more pain and misery to people than the powerhouses in The Dark Side do. And you Gravedigger, you know as well as I do that the Team of Treachery would bring the ruthlessness and TREACHERY that The Dark Side lacks. Guys, just think about it. Who out there could stop the six of you? Who could stop the team of Gravedigger and Logan? Or since he’s in the world title match, the team of Gravedigger and FPV?
The crowd is going crazy, half booing half cheering.
Seth Lerch: That’s the only thing that’s been stopping either group from being the best here in WCF is that you’re always fighting each other. All through WCF history. Back in the day, it didn’t matter, but here and now…IT MATTERS. The Dark Side and the Team of Treachery, one supergroup dominating Pantheon, Monster’s Inc., Future Gods Incorporated. Those groups would all have to team together just to even THINK about stopping…The Darkside of Treachery!!
Logan and Gravedigger stop and look at each other. Both men step up and get in each other’s faces running their mouths at each other. Seth stands off to the side, observing. After about 30 or 40 seconds, Gravedigger’s right hand slowly creeps up between himself and Logan. Logan looks down at his hand, then at Seth, back to Gravedigger and then out into the crowd. A few seconds pass by and finally Logan clasps Gravedigger’s hand and the two men shake hands as the crowd explodes.
Zach Davis: WHAT THE HELL?!?
Shannan Lerch: ….
Zach Davis: Shannan? Oh man, she seems to have fainted from this. Wow, I can’t really say anything. The Dark Side and the Team of Treachery are one group?? Logan and Gravedigger on the same side?!? Well, it is 2012.
“Master of Puppets” by Metallica hits the speakers. Seth stays in the ring for a second watching The Dark Side and the Team of Treachery getting along. He climbs out of the ring and slowly both groups follow out after him and everyone heads to the back as the show goes to commercial.
The opening strains of "Paegan Love Song" by Acid Bath hit the PA and the crowd comes to life as the arena lights turn to a dim glow.
"Dying felt so goddamn good today
The darkened silhouette of Jam Willy Jesus appears at the entrance way and the cheers grow louder. Jam Willy acknowledges the fans by pounding his chest with his left fist twice and then raising that same fist into the air, before starting his walk down the aisle. A prison style spotlight follows Jam Willy as he slaps hands with the fans that have come to greet him along the security barrier, and makes his way down to the ring.
Jam Willy rolls into the ring and climbs onto the turnbuckles, raising both arms into the air while the fans shower him with cheers. Willy nods his head and smiles then hops off of the turnbuckles. He removes his leather jacket and beaded necklace and hands them to a ringside attendant, then uses the ring ropes to do some last-minute stretches before the match begins.
Zach Davis: Well here's Jam Willy Jesus! He's got a different look going since the last time we saw him competing on Slam.
Shannan Lerch: Yes sir, Zach. The beard has been shaved and the long black hair has been dyed a dark red. These day he's looking less like a cult leader and more like a serial killer.
Zach Davis: Definite improvement, I'd say.
Shannan Lerch: Oh, for sure. Willy can get me wet any ol' time. RAWR!
Zach Davis: Settle down, Lisa.
Jam Willy's opponent, the masked Mexican luchadore El Coolo, is already in the ring. They meet at center ring and engage in a staredown. Well, technically, Coolo is staring at Willy, but Willy is staring down at the mat, not even acknowledging his high-flying foe. Referee Zip Wingdinger calls for the bell.
Willy jumps to action with a motherfucker of a knee to El Coolo's midsection. The luchadore is doubled over in pain and covers up with his arms in a desperate bid to shield himself from further punishment. Willy wraps his hands around the shorter Coolo's head in a Muay Thai clinch and absolutely LEVELS him with one devastating knee strike after another to the face, not giving the masked superstar any chance to recover. The damage quickly becomes apparent when blood begins to flow from Coolo's mask, as if from a faucet.
Zach Davis: Ugh. This has already gotten ugly. Jam Willy Jesus has assumed control of this match and he's mauling El Coolo with vicious Muay Thai knees to the face!
Shannan Lerch: Coolo might be out cold, Zach. I'm not even sure if he's still breathing. The referee needs to halt the action right now and check Coolo for a pulse.
Zip tries to intervene but he can't pry Coolo from Willy's Muay Thai clinch. Zip issues a verbal warning to Willy, prompting a scowl from Jesus. Jam Willy suddenly releases Coolo from his grip. The luchadore plummets lifelessly to the mat. Wingdinger immediately calls for the bell and begins tending to Coolo.
Zach Davis: Jam Willy Jesus wins this match via knock out in under a minute, but the big story is that El Coolo might be dead.
Shannan Lerch: Wait, Zach... his legs are twitching. He's not dead! El Coolo lives!
The crowd lets out a cheer for El Coolo's heart and perseverance. Even Jam Willy applauds Coolo.
Zach Davis: Wow, great sportsmanship from Willy. He nearly murdered Coolo during the match, but he immediately expressed concern for Coolo's well-being once the match was over, and now he's cheering him on!
Shannan Lerch: Jam Willy Jesus is one-hundred percent pure class, Zach. I've always said that.
Willy extends his hand to Coolo and pulls the luchadore up from the mat. They briefly embrace before Willy raises Coolo's arm triumphantly.
Zach Davis: What a great sight! We need more of this type of sportsmanship in WCF!
Shannan Lerch: Not just in WCF, Zach... IN SOCIETY.
In an instant the good vibes are dashed when Willy throttles Coolo with another stiff knee to the midsection and spikes his head on the mat with a sickening Leg-trap, sunset flip powerbomb.
Zach Davis: Oh my God, thou Father who art in Heaven! Jam Willy Jesus just hit the Monolithic Mind Bong on an already severely injured El Coolo! What is the meaning of this? Why, Willy, why!?
Shannan Lerch: I am... stunned. Words cannot describe what I am feeling. Only my last period can describe what I am feeling.
Willy climbs out of the ring and grabs a microphone from the nameless sexy blonde ring attendant with the big hooters. Willy sneers at her, causing her to scurry away, before he climbs back into the ring. The crowd is booing its balls off at the suddenly very much heelish Jesus.
Jam Willy Jesus: Yeah, go ahead... Booo! Booo! Whaaa! Whaaa! Go cry yourselves a river! I'm from North Dakota! Believe me, you don't know what real suffering is like!
Crowd: YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!
Jam Willy Jesus: You can all suck my ass! I've been sitting at home in my shitty little run down, damn near condemned apartment for months on end waiting for the phone to ring. Waiting to hear that I had been booked on Slam. Do you know what? Not one damned phone call! Not one call for months until THIS week when they needed someone to open the show against this piece of garbage.
Willy spits at the fallen, defeated and barely breathing Coolo.
Jam Willy Jesus: Meanwhile, Emperor Joel Hall and his band of jobbers parade around on Slam every week without a care in the world, laughing gaily and wearing irregular underpants. Well who's laughing now, motherfucker!?
Willy yanks back on Coolo's arms and drives his foot into the back of Coolo's skull with a VICIOUS curb stomp, A.K.A Mercy Killing. The crowd gasps in horror as boos rain down from all corners of the Arena.
Jam Willy Jesus: Do you know what I say? I say no more jobbers! I say it's time for this shit to end! It's time for the real talent to have a chance to shine! That's why I'm laying down the challenge to Joel Hall, right here and right now. I want your jobber emperor ass one-on-one at Blast, Hall! If you don't accept my challenge then I will destroy each and every one of your jobbers, one by one, until I get to you. And if you do accept... I WILL MURDER YOU LIVE ON PAY-PER-VIEW AT BLAST!
With that Willy drops the mic, pulls out a prison shiv from his boot, and begins stabbing Coolo in the neck. The gruesome scene continues for several moments until a flood of twenty or so referees and road agents storm the ring and finally manage to pry Willy from his victim, restraining Jesus while medics tend to Coolo and eventually wheel him out on a stretcher.
The cameras open up and the sound of running water can be heard before the tap was turned off. Stepping from out of the shower, and quickly wrapping a towel around her was none other then the Sex Goddess herself, Kaylyn James Evans. Grabbing a second towel she dabbed at her wet hair before tossing the towel aside and moving from the small area towards the larger portion of the locker room to grab her now ringing phone.
Kaylyn James Evans: Hello?
While speaking Kaylyn lifted a leg, and pulled the towel from around her body off to dry her leg, before doing the same to the other and tossing the towel on the bench next to her.
Kaylyn James Evans: Look, it's not like that at all.
Whoever she was talking to was boring her, or at least the topic of conversation was. A light blue lace bra was secured around her chest, before she put her legs through a matching thong and pulled it up around her waist covering her sweet spot.
Kaylyn James Evans: I don't see why you are reading into this so much. It was just drinking. Just dancing. Nothing else happened. I have no interest in Chad what so ever.
Chad Evans, ever the sly Dogg, appears in the corner of Kaylyn's locker room, positioned out of sight behind her. His presence, though unbeknownst to her, is clearly visible to the WCF camera. We're able to watch as Chad sneaks up behind Kaylyn and sniffs at her hair. The aroma is intoxicating, causing his eyes to roll back into his head as he lets out a sigh. Kay wrinkles her nose and raises her ears. She heard something, but what was that? Could there be an intruder in her locker room? Before Kay can inspect, she feels two large masculine hands pinching her ass cheeks. Kaylyn yelps and thrusts a back kick towards the likely groin area of the groper.
Chad, ever the martial arts expert, catches her foot and uses the leverage to spin her entire body around, planting her ass-first on the bench while still holding her foot. The look on Kaylyn's beautiful face is a mixture of shock and relief when she sees that it's Chad.
Chad Evans: Granted I may have been distracted since you had just stepped out of the shower, but did I hear you right? It was just drinking, just dancing? Nothing else happened? You have no interest in me what so ever?
Kaylyn James Evans: Chad! What are you doing here? You can't just barge into my locker room!
Kaylyn tries to squirm her foot away from Chad's grip, but he is having none of that.
Chad Evans: Oh? Is that so?
Within seconds Kaylyn is paralyzed with pleasure as Chad's magic fingers work the sole and arch of her foot.
Chad Evans: You wanna kick the foot fuckin' master out of your locker room? Is that really what you want to do right now, Kaylyn?
Kaylyn James Evans: I.... ugh..
Kay was silent for a moment, closing her eyes while trying to think of what to say, but the pleasure was becoming to much. Opening her eyes she pushed the thoughts away as quickly as she could, but not as quickly as they came.
Kaylyn James Evans: Chad, you should not be in here right now.
Chad was not listening to anything she was saying right now, and if he was... he was not making it known. Kaylyn groaned before leaning forward and taking both of his hands from her foot holding onto them to keep him from distracting her.
Kaylyn James Evans: Listen to me damn it. I told you before... years ago even.. there can never be anything more to us. We were young, we weren't thinking... we made a ... mistake.
Kaylyn said the words, but it didn't sound like she believed them herself at the same time.
Chad peers into Kaylyn's beautiful brown eyes with his baby blues. He searches for signs of truth and signs of fiction. Chad shakes his head. He's not buying what Kaylyn is trying to sell him. He takes Kaylyn's hands into his own and begins rubbing them as he speaks to her calmly, rationally, but passionately.
Chad Evans: Kaylyn, baby, listen to me. We were young and maybe we weren't thinking, but we didn't have to think. We knew it was right because we could feel it inside of us. What we did was no mistake. Following your heart is never a mistake, not when there's a love so pure and so true as ours.
Chad gulps. He's looking into her eyes and Kaylyn is looking into his. Neither of them make a move. Kay sits still on the bench while Chad kneels on the floor in front of her, pouring his heart out to her.
Chad Evans: You are the most wonderful woman that I have ever met, Kaylyn. Sure there have been other women that have come into my life, and yes I did care for some of them. I even married one of them, Kaylyn. You know I did and that was a mistake, but I only did it because I thought that maybe... maybe I would have to settle for a life without you. I got of tired of waiting for you to walk back into my life and I didn't know how to find you or how to make you listen. Now that we're here, together, I'm not going to let you walk out of my life again. Not without letting you know how I feel.
Kaylyn James Evans: Chad, please, don't do this. How can you not see this as wrong? You are my...
Kaylyn cut herself short by biting on her lower lip, and taking a deep breath.
Kaylyn James Evans: I really can't have this conversation right now. I need to dress. I have to meet up with my clients. Damn it Chad, just the other night you were assuming everything I did in showing up was to fuck you over when it came to my clients.
She sighed softly before pulling her hands from his own slowly.
Kaylyn James Evans: I stayed away because I needed to Chad. I needed to figure things out for myself. You moved on... you were happy until Bobby fucked things up for you. You can be happy without me in your life. You have proved that. Not only that... you have known how to find me for a long time Chad. I know you followed the sport while you were not here. You must have known I came to the WCF last year, there is no way around it. Maybe your head is just clouded when I am around you?
Chad Evans: I will admit that I was suspicious the other night when we met at the bar, Kaylyn. I had reason to be suspicious. You're managing one of my opponents that I'll be facing on Slam. You were hesitant to even meet me in the first place. You've been ducking me every chance you can. You're hesitant to even speak my name when asked about me by Hank Brown.
Chad rises to his feet. He runs his fingers through his spiky blond hair and lets out a sigh. He looks down at Kaylyn, looks into her eyes once more, still pleading his case.
Chad Evans: Yes, I was suspicious of your intent, but that was only because I had to know that what we have is still pure, that it hasn't been corrupted. After the night that we spent together, Kaylyn, I don't know how you can deny it. You don't feel what I feel right now? The sheer exhilaration of being here with you? I have to tell you something, Kaylyn. Bobby did me a favor. He did me a favor by taking Leanne out of my life, because she was never the one that I wanted. She was never the one that I truly belonged with. You, Kaylyn...
Chad bends down on one knee in front of Kaylyn and touches her face with his hands.
Chad Evans: You are the one that I love. You are the one that I belong with. You are my soul mate. I could have never expected things to unfold this way. Not when I was watching you on TV while you were winning Television Championships and giving Odin and D-Day hell in the Ultimate Showdown match. You felt so far away. Even though I was watching you on TV, it felt like we were in different worlds. I couldn't pursue you then. I had a marriage. I wasn't part of this world... this Wrestling Championship Federation world. I knew the timing wasn't right. I knew you were with Corey and that you would only resent me for interfering, but now...
Chad rubs Kaylyn's cheeks with his fingertips.
Chad Evans: Now you cannot deny it, Kaylyn. We would not be here, right here, right now, if it was not meant to be between us. How funny can fate possibly be? Fate has united us through opposing forces in battle. You manage Sarah and Ayria. I have waged war against them. You... you were practically brought to me by my enemies. If that isn't fate, if that isn't a sign, then what more do you need?
Kaylyn sighed while listening to what he had to say. Her thoughts and feelings on the matter were something she was not planning to share.
Kaylyn James Evans: There is one thing you missed in all that Chad. Roy Speede. Do you expect me to just walk away?
Chad nods his head. He rises to his feet and paces around the locker room a bit, looking as if he's transfixed in thought. After a moment, he stops in his tracks and takes a deep breath. He smiles at Kaylyn with a look of bitterness in his eyes and exhales.
Chad Evans: I didn't forget, Kaylyn. I didn't forget at all. I was hoping that I could make you forget, that's for sure. I can't, uh...
Chad clears his throat.
Chad Evans: I can't tell you what to do, Kaylyn. I have no desire to tell you what to do. You are your own woman and I have always respected you because of that. You're going to have to make a choice and decide what you truly want, decide what will make you happy. Just remember one thing, Kaylyn...
Chad walks over to Kay and places his hands on her shoulders. He massages them gently. She lets out a moan before quickly correcting herself.
Chad Evans: Blood is thicker than water.
Chad leans in and kisses Kaylyn on the lips. surprising her. After a moment of lip wrestling he pulls himself away, against his own will. Kaylyn looks stunned. Chad turns around, walks toward the door, takes one last look at Kaylyn and exits the room. Kaylyn sat there for a long moment, her finger tips brushing along her lips lost in thought.
Kaylyn James Evans: That's the problem with this though.
She said to herself with a sigh.
The camera shows Waylon Cash standing backstage, arguing with Roxxy. As the volume comes in, we can hear their argument.
Waylon Cash: You're not coming out there tonight.
Roxxy: I don't care if it's dangerous, I wanna be there for you!
Waylon Cash: You won't be much help against what's coming. Just stay back here.
Roxxy glares at him for a moment, but decides to heed his advice, and stays behind as he makes his way down the hallway, and we fade out to a commercial.
Blake Updegraff IV's face slowly fades onto the otherwise black screen.
Blake Updegraff IV: Sheepatosis. It may sound silly, but it's a very real disease, and it affects more people than you might think.
Blake's face fades out, and is replaced by Benjamin Atreyu.
Benjamin Atreyu: Luckily, the signs are very easy to spot. Do you find yourself cheering for supposed good guys like Waylon Cash and Johnny Reb?
Benji's face fades out, and the face of Gein Spector fades in.
Gein Spector: Do you bring signs proclaiming your devotion to pompous, self involved jackasses like Johnny Fly, or Kid Phantasm?
Gein fades out, and an image of all three of them standing together fades in.
Blake Updegraff IV: Do you run to the merchandise booth, and buy masks from wrestler's who don't have the courage to show you their faces? These are the signs of Sheepatosis, and if you experience any of them, you might have this horrible, embarrassing disease.
Benjamin Atreyu: Luckily, there is a cure. At the nearest merchandise stand, you can purchase a Future Gods Incorporated T-shirt, bumper sticker, poster, hat, or any number of other items. Purchasing just one item of merchandise from true heroes, like us, is the first step to curing your Sheepatosis.
All In Unison: Future Gods Incorporated: Don't be a sheep.
The commercial ends, and we see a shot of the ring.
“MURDERRRRR! CLIMB ABOARD THE MURDERRR TRAAAAIIIIIN!”
Murder train comes roaring over the PA system, and a good amount of booing can be heard as Hardcore McMurderkill steps out onto the ramp. In his hand is a kendo stick, with barbed wire wrapped around it. Behind him is his manager, Blake Updegraff IV.
Kyle Steel: This match is scheduled for one fall, with a half hour time limit. Introducing first, hailing from Hell, Michigan, standing five feet, four inches tall, Hardcore McMurderkill!
Hardcore raises the kendo stick high in the air as the crowd boos. The two men then walk down the ramp, and Hardcore runs up the steps, in order to hold the ropes open for Blake. Both men step into the ring, and discuss strategy as the crowd boos. Slowly Hardcore's music dies, and is replaced by the opening trumpet riff of “White Trash Renegade”.
Waylon Cash steps out onto the entrance ramp, and smiles at his screaming fans. He tosses his hat out to a woman in the audience, and begins to dance down the ramp.
Kyle Steel: Now coming to the ring, hailing from Macon Georgia, standing six feet, five inches tall, Waylon Cash!
Waylon rolls under the bottom rope, and Hardcore McMurderkill rushes over, and starts stomping on him. The bell rings and the match is underway. McMurderkill's advantage doesn't last long, as Waylon stands to his feet, and kicks Hardcore in the gut. Waylon grabs him by the head, and waistband, and throws him between the top and bottom rope. Hardcore goes flying out of the ring, and lands on Blake Updegraff IV. They go sprawling to the concrete as the crowd erupts.
Zach Davis: Waylon takes the early advantage, and sends a message with a throw to the outside.
Shannan Lerch: I think that one might have been more for Blake than it was McMurderkill.
Waylon waits inside the ring, while the men on the outside are recuperating, a murmur starts to go through the crowd, and the camera suddenly focuses on Logan, who is making his way through the crowd.
Shannan Lerch: Well Logan and Waylon were doing some jawing back and forth on Twitter this week. You gotta wonder what Logan's motive's are, and what he's planning on doing.
Logan comes to the front row, only to take his seat in one of the empty chairs behind the guardrail.
Zach Davis: It looks like Logan just wants to check out the match. Of course, there's no telling with him.
Waylon stares at Logan for a moment, but notices that Hardcore McMurderkill has risen to his feet, and is helping his manager do likewise. As soon as they are standing, Waylon bounces off the opposite ropes, and comes flying over the top with a no handed plancha. He lands on both men, and sends them all crashing to the floor. Waylon stands, and raises his fists high above his head. Cash then grabs Hardcore, and tosses him, back first, into the steel guardrail. He the rolls his opponent into the ring, and follows after him. Cash lifts McMurderkill, and whips him into the ropes. On the rebound, Waylon hits him with a big flying calf kick. When Cash pops up, and has a huge grin on his face.
Zach Davis: Waylon is reveling in this. He is really enjoying himself.
Shannan Lerch: When I talked to him earlier today, he said he wanted to teach Hardcore McMurderkill a lesson about the company he keeps.
Waylon drags his opponent to a standing position in the corner, but Blake Updegraff IV jumps on the apron, distracting both Waylon, and the referee. As the distraction is happening, Hardcore reaches back and unties the turnbuckle pad from the steel ring it is concealing. Blake jumps down, and as Waylon turns around, Hardcore hits him with a drop toe hold. Cash falls face first into the steel turnbuckle, and drops to the ground clutching his jaw.
Zach Davis: My God! Cash may have broken his jaw!
McMurderkill turns him around, and starts hitting him with rights and lefts to the chin area. Waylon screams out, and shoves Hardcore backward. McMurderkill runs back at Waylon, but not before Cash gets a boot up to kick him in the face. Hardcore stumbles back, allowing Waylon to stand up, and this him with a running dropkick to the back. McMurderkill falls forward into the opposite turnbuckle. Waylon backs up, and runs at him, hitting him with another dropkick to the back.
Zach Davis: Waylon's smile has vanished. He has turned into an angry man.
Hardcore falls to the ground, but Waylon quickly tosses him tot he center of the ring, and lifts him to his feet. Cash then underhooks both of Hardcore's arms, and lifts him up ebfore hitting him with a butterfly brainbuster.
Shannan Lerch: Killshot!
Waylon goes for the pin.
Waylon pops up and begins to celebrate, but Blake Updegraff IV quickly slides into the ring, and hits him in the back with the barbed wire kendo stick that McMurderkill brought to the ring. Waylon stumbles, and turns around to get hit with a blast of pepper spray to the eyes. Waylon falls to the ground, and as he's trying to get his sight back, Benjamin Atreyu, and Gein Spector climb out of the audience. The two wrestlers slide into the ring, and stand on either side of a blinded Waylon.
Zach Davis: What are they going to do now? They've done everything they can think of to Waylon, what could they possibly do now?
Atreyu lifts Waylon to his knees, and Gein bounces off the ropes before hitting Waylon with a solid Midwest nail to the jaw. Waylon collapses, and the crowd rains down boos on Gein, Benji, and Blake. Suddenly, the booing turns to cheers as Johnny Reb and doc Henry come running down the entrance ramp, chairs in hand. The three men dive out of the ring, leaving and unconscious McMurderkill to fend for himself as they disappear through the crowd. Reb drops down to check on Waylon, as Doc rolls his eyes, and brings his chair down on the prone back of Hardcore McMurderkill a few times. Doc rolls out, and makes his way to the locker room, as Reb helps Waylon out of the ring.
“Change” by Deftones starts playing as words come up on the screen. The words are all being read by a familiar sounding voice.
3-time World Champion….
War IV winner….
3-time Tag Team Champion….
United States Champion….
WCF Hall of Famer…..
Footage from War IV in 2003 plays on the screen. Matthew Steele ducks a superkick from Gravedigger, goes for his finisher The Facelift, but Gravedigger reverses it and drops Matthew Steele on his head with a Death Driver pinning him for the three count.
The scene fades into the WCF studios where a skinny, professionally-dressed man is seated. The crowd pops when they see his name and title pop up on the screen. It’s Jayson Stasiak, Gravedigger’s Former Manager.
Jayson Stasiak: Here’s the facts. When it comes to Gravedigger and world title matches, he’s a surefire bet. He’s been in 12 world title matches in his career, no matter if it was as challenger or champion. Eight wins, 3 losses and 1 no contest.
Footage from WCF Blast 2003 plays showing Logan leaping over Gravedigger’s shoulder for a Connector. Gravedigger grabs Logan in mid-air, holds him in position and after forcing Logan to let go of the sleeper hold, drops him on his head for the Death Driver. Footage switches quickly to Gravedigger defeating Cyrus at Ultimate Showdown 2003 for his second title reign, then successfully defending his title against Steve Carr, Bishop and then Madd Dogg three consecutive weeks in a row that month.
The scene switches back to Jayson Stasiak in the WCF Studios.
Jayson Stasiak: Gravedigger’s beaten the best there is: Hellz Angel, Mace, Logan, Creeping Death, Chad Evans, and even Slickie T.
Footage of Gravedigger defeating each one plays after each person’s name is mentioned. The scene cuts back to Jayson Stasiak once more.
Jayson Stasiak: Trust me as someone who has known Gravedigger since his debut years ago: you haven’t really seen Gravedigger until you’ve seen him go for the world title. This isn’t a match for the hardcore title or the tag team titles. This isn’t some Trios tournament, this is for the world title. Gravedigger is a totally different man when it comes to the world title. There is no room for failure. He is unstoppable.
Clip after clip quickly plays of Gravedigger hitting the Death Driver on various opponents. The scene finally switches a pre-recorded segment of Gravedigger standing in a dark room, barely visible to the camera. Jayson’s voice can be heard one last time.
Jayson Stasiak: On June 24th, 2012 at Blast…Gravedigger will not be stopped.
The scene slowly fades to black and the show cuts to commercial.
The haunting guitar riffs of Cold's Confession drift through the arena as the Femme ICON makes her way out onto the stage and down the ramp amidst the chorus of boos and jeers. She saunters her way down, slides into the ring and goes to the far corner, climbing the turn buckle, raising both arms into the air, egging the crowd on.
“Follow Me, Boys!” plays as Stu marches out from the back, silently mouthing the lyrics to his theme as he heads down the ramp. He does a circuit around the outside of the ring before climbing the steps and entering. After some last minute old timey calisthenics (Indian twists, deep knee bends, etc) The Scoutmaster goes his corner. He hands his hat and sash off to a WCF stagehand and assumes a fighting position.
The arena goes black.
Voice: The true Villain is back!
"Kickin' Ass and Takin' Names by Moccasin Creek starts playing as a single white light hits the entrance. Boss steps out into the arena in a black pinstripe suit laughing. Out steps Adam in a camo "Villain" t-shirt with a skull with a yellow rose in its mouth and black wrestling tights with red "Villain" on each side. Around his waist is the Texas Heavyweight championship belt. He motions for Boss to follow him and they start towards the ring. Adam stops half way down and points at a fan in the crowd. Adam grabs the sign the fan has and blows his nose on it before he rips it up. Boss points and laughs at it. The camera pans down and the sign reads "Corey Black Rules". Adam comes back and pulla the camera up and tells the camera guy to stay off that crap. Adam slides into the ring and the fans begin the "BTJ" chant as he throws his t-shirt into the crowd.
Zach Davis: Oh wow. We've got some Corey Black fans here in attendance tonight.
Shannan Lerch: Sigh...
"Something in Your Mouth" by Nickleback plays over the loud speakers as Hunter makes his way down the ramp to a chorus of boos. He stops in the middle of the ramp as green and black pyros go off behind him.
Hunter slides in underneath the bottom rope as he puts his hands on the top rope and glares menacingly into the camera. He is cascaded by boos as the intensity in this face is shown to the world. Pyros go off in the background as his glare is never changing. The boos continue.
Zach Davis: And here we go!
Shannan Lerch: Hey, Zach, don't you want to join Slane's Scouts?
Zach Davis: Um.. no.
Hunter Valentyne immediately goes for Adam Young, tackling him down and hitting him with several punches right to the face.
Shannan Lerch: Just like the rest of WCF, Hunter REALLY hates Adam Young.
But Apathy, looking to gain a measure of revenge, pulls Hunter off and grabs him from behind... hitting him with a huge German Suplex!
Zach Davis: Just like Hunter grabbed HER from behind last night.. ZING!
Shannan Lerch: Pig. But yeah, word going around backstage is that Hunter and Apathy were engaged in.. activities... and Hunter abandoned her, handcuffed to the bed. So I imagine she's going to be grumpy about that.
Hunter stumbles to his feet, and looking to add insult to injury, Apathy grabs Adam Young's face and gives him a big overexaggerated kiss right on the lips, just to enrage Hunter!
Zach Davis: OH MY GOD!
Adam Young's eyes go wide and once Apathy is done with the kiss, she kicks him in the gut and throws him out of the ring. He hits the mat, stumbles up, and despite getting kicked has a huge smile across his face.
Shannan Lerch: ...
Meanwhile, the Scoutmaster is looking on with disgust at this whole thing. Hunter Valentyne is pissed beyond belief. He runs at Apathy, going to Clothesline her down, but Apathy ducks it and grabs Hunter's head, going for an Evenflow DDT! Hunter has it well scouted, however, escapes free and hits her with a Russian Legsweep, taking her down to the mat.
Zach Davis: Whoever said that wrestling was a soap opera for men, this match is proving their point.
Hunter begins stomping at Apathy, but Slane grabs him and begins yelling at him for physically assaulting a woman. Hunter yells back that this is a wrestling match, but Slane shakes his head. Meanwhile, Apathy crawls over to Slane from behind, and hits him with a low blow.
Shannan Lerch: Hah!
Zach Davis: Oof...
Slane cringes and slumps into Hunter, who hits him with a Gutwrench Suplex. He pins him.
No, Apathy pulls him off. Hunter kicks Apathy away and kicks her into the turnbuckle, where he begins choking her with his boot.
Shannan Lerch: She may or may not be enjoying that.
Next, Hunter climbs up an adjacent turnbuckle.
Zach Davis: What's he going for here? High risk move, coming up!
But Apathy gets to her feet and grabs his leg, pulling him down.
Shannan Lerch: Apathy just jerked Hunter off! ..... the turnbuckle!..
Apathy then throws Hunter to the ropes and catches him with a Uranage Spinebomb! Hunter rolls out as Adam Young reenters the ring. Instead of attacking Apathy, he puckers up for another kiss.
Zach Davis: Oh, brother...
Apathy goes to attack him, but Adam was expecting it. He sidesteps Apathy and hits her with a Superkick!, sending her flying over the top rope to the outside!
Shannan Lerch: She just landed on top of Hunter!
Young turns to Slane now, who has finally recovered from his low blow. Young gives him the scout's salute, but this only angers Slane. Slane throws Young to the ropes and then lifts him up for a Gorilla Press into a Flapjack!
Zach Davis: Ouch!
Slane pins Young, hooking the leg.
No! Young kicks out.
Shannan Lerch: Say what you like about Adam Young, but he's resilient.
Slane kicks at Young a few times before putting him into a Bow and Arrow Hold. Young screams in pain.
Zach Davis: Adam Young is a submission expert, and he's trapped in this hold... is he gonna tap out?
No, Young is able to reach and grab the ropes. Slane is forced to release the hold. Slane pulls Young into the middle of the ring and grabs his legs.
Shannan Lerch: He's trying to lock in the Knotted Up!
But Young knows whats coming, he kicks Slane away with all he's got. Slane backs up, runs at Young, but Young grabs him and rolls him up!
No!, Slane gets out of it.
Zach Davis: Adam Young almost had him there!
Apathy, from out of nowhere, Springboards and Dropkicks Adam Young right in the chest! Adam is propelled backwards and flies over the top rope, once again to the outside. She lifts Slane up in a Vertical Suplex position, then brings him down with a Falcon Arrow into pin!
Shannan Lerch: This could be it!
No! Hunter is back in the ring too and breaks it up!
Zach Davis: Apathy almost had it!
Hunter grabs Apathy, pulling her in, and hits her with a Double Underhook Canadian Destroyer!
Shannan Lerch: It's Valentyme!
Valentyne drops onto Apathy, pinning his former girlfriend.
Zach Davis: Hunter Valentyne picks up the victory!
Shannan Lerch: By pinning his former love, no less!
Valentyne stands up, looking down at Apathy. He gets his arm raised, looking down at her the whole time, before leaving the ring and heading to the back.
Backstage we see Famine of the Vile, Oblivion and Nathan Von Liebert in the hallway talking when Sarah Twilight passes by them. Famine sees her and stops talking. He walks up to her and gets in her way not letting her pass.
Sarah Twilight: You gonna move or do I have to move you?
Famine: Are you serious?
Sarah Twilight: Do I look like I'm joking?
Famine: Perhaps you haven't been paying attention so allow me to enlighten you. There's a new sheriff in town so to speak. And he's got his gun pointed right at your fucking head.
Sarah Twilight: You wanna do something? Do it now! I dare you!
Famine: No, no, no. See, that would mean that I get suspended. I'm not about to do something stupid like that. But I tell you what I WILL do. I'm going to speak to Seth in a little while and I'm going to ask him for a match. That match is going to be between you and me at the next pay per view. And it's going to end things once and for all. Do you know why?
Sarah Twilight: Oh this I have to hear.
Famine: I have much bigger plans in store with the gentlemen behind me that involve the destruction of any and everyone who get in our way. But before I do that I need to teach you a lesson once and for all. And it's going to be a lesson you will NEVER forget.
Sarah Twilight: Famine, if there's one thing I've learned about you since this whole thing started is that you're full of shit. Don't run your mouth. Just do it.
Famine: Oh, I will. Believe me when I tell you that you have no chance in hell of beating me. I guarantee it!
Sarah Twilight: We'll see.
Famine and Sarah both lock eyes for a moment before she shoves him aside and keeps going.
Famine: She has no clue what she's getting herself into.
Oblivion: You really gonna ask Seth to approve that match?
Famine: Damn right. If there's one thing I'm good at it's getting the advantage over my prey. When I created this match 10 years ago it was something no one ever saw before. And to this day if you ask around the world they will tell you that the de-
Famine sees the camera still there and stops talking
Famine: I'll tell you when there's no cameras around.
The scene then heads back to the arena.
Zach Davis: I wonder what this match will be?
Shannan Lerch: I don't know but I have a feeling that he has something sadistic up his sleeve.
Zach Davis: This next matchup may prove controversial.
Shannan Lerch: Now why would you say that?
Zach Davis: Eric Price isn’t exactly known for being the most honest person in the world.
Shannan Lerch: Are you accusing Eric Price of being a liar? You should watch your mouth because he could sue you for that. And with the money he has, he could win.
Kyle Steel: The following matchup is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first…
Eric Price comes walking down the entrance ramp with a microphone in hand cutting off Kyle Steel. He is already wearing a referee’s uniform.
Eric Price: Whoa, whoa whoa. Kyle, shut up, hit the bricks and watch how a pro introduces the competitors to a match.
Zach Davis: What an arrogant jackass!
Shannan Lerch: Hey, you’d best calm down or I’ll go tell him what you’re saying.
Zach Davis: Yeah, sure you will. As Eric makes his way into the ring, kicking our regular ring announcer out, he thinks he can do a better job.
Crowd: Asshole, asshole, asshole!
Eric Price: Ahem! A little respect please! Thank you! Now, the following contest is scheduled for one fall. It will be under regular rules with a special guest referee, a smart, handsome, charismatic individual, a man that is known for his integrity … ME!
Zach Davis: Oh please.
Eric Price: Introducing first, weighing in at 165 lbs, standing 6 feet 2 inches tall, he is from Stockton, California, a great wrestler, a great competitor, a man who knows exactly what he is doing in this ring, my friend Tek!
The lights go out and then on the screen you see a hand that is holding five fingers up and every second that goes past and finger goes down till one and the one second finger is the middle finger. Then Devastating Stereo up plays and the camera goes to the stage where Tek is standing. They put a spot light to the silhouette of Tek as he stands and it shows him wearing long black basketball shorts, a black pair of DC shoes, and a black and white LA dodger hat with a water bottle in hand. Tek then comes walking down the ramp as he drinks from the water bottle and bopping his head to the song and in his other hand has a black baseball bat and as he starts comes to the ring the screen goes from color to black and white and when he gets in the ring, the screen goes back to color and black smoke falls from the roof.
Zach Davis: Well, we know how this is going to be slanted. Although I must say that Tek seems to be getting a mixed reaction here tonight, more cheers than boos.
Shannan Lerch: Now to be fair, we haven’t heard him introduce his opponent yet, for all you know, he could give him the same type of treatment. You just love to jump to conclusions don’t you.
Eric Price: And now, his opponent, hailing from … well actually, I don’t really care. His opponent, Jonathan Jakobs. That’s what you get for attacking me you son of a bitch!
Eric quickly drops the microphone and turns his back not even looking when Jonathan Jakobs’ music hits.
All of the lights in the arena dim simultaneously... Next, a massive pulsing light pierces through the vicinity as a barrage of pyrotechnics erupt. Smoke pours from the stage in the midst of various colors & hues. "Riot" by 2 Chainz pumps from the speakers as "The Dare Devil" Jonathan Jakobs emerges from behind the curtains. He briefly stops and places his right fist in the air, the crowd gives him a mixed reaction. Jonathan strides down to the ring as he exchanges high-fives with a few of the fans. He climbs the steps & enters the ring.
Shannan Lerch: Oh look at this, Jakobs going right toward Eric Price, turning him around as Price was completely ignoring him.
Zach Davis: Price reminding Jakobs however that this evening, he is the only the official and not his opponent.
Eric Price: Back it up both of you, back it up!
Zach Davis: Well, looks like Price is doing this thing fair and square despite a very one-sided introduction of the competitors.
Shannan Lerch: One sided? I don’t see that, I thought it was fair and he was honest about it.
Zach Davis: Nevertheless, both opponents in their respective corners and Price calls for the bell to be rung and here we go. As both competitors approach each other face to face after what can only be described as a heinous and unprovoked attack last week by Jakobs, both Tek and possibly Eric Price are looking for vengeance here tonight. And, damn.
Shannan Lerch: A slap to the face straight from Jonathan Jakobs to Tek. He’s sending a clear message tonight that he means business.
Zach Davis: But Tek quickly follows up with an uppercut to Jakobs. Jakobs responds back with a punch to Tek. Tek punches Jakobs, Jakobs punches Tek. Jakobs connects again, and again and he goes to the ropes and hits a clothesline on Tek here, knocking him down.
Shannan Lerch: And Jakobs isn’t wasting any time here tonight. Cover.
Zach Davis: A quick kick out. Price barely counted to one. Jakobs applying a headlock to Tek here, trying to wear him down in the early going of this matchup.
Shannan Lerch: Yes, Jakobs said last week that it was only the beginning and I think this week, he intends to show that.
Zach Davis: Well, we had not seen this young athlete compete since before the Asesinato De Mayo PPV and tonight he seems to be firing on all cylinders. He still has that headlock solidly applied, trying to make Tek fade here. Price goes to check Tek’s arm, the right call to make here. He lifts it, but no, Tek is still in this.
Shannan Lerch: Tek is getting up trying to power out of it and he reverses it into a backbreaker on Jakobs!
Zach Davis: Now that’s impressive. Both men are down now as Price simply looks on at this carnage. And, slowly but Tek goes for the cover.
Shannan Lerch: And no! A kickout by Jakobs just before the three count. Tek looks a bit surprised.
Zach Davis: So far, it seems Eric Price has been calling this match, well as he said, right down the middle.
Shannan Lerch: And you doubted him.
Zach Davis: And Tek is going for the top rope, looks like he’s really going to try to end this now. And, he’s calling for it, the audience giving him all their energy. 450 Splash and oh no! Jakobs moves out of the way as Tek lands on the canvas.
Shannan Lerch: And Jakobs smiling as he rolls Tek over and goes for the cover.
Zach Davis: But Tek kicks out, almost at 3! Jakobs didn’t like that. Oh, and now he’s getting right in Eric Price’s face, arguing about this count.
Shannan Lerch: Price reminding however that he is the official in this matchup and that it was indeed a 2 count.
Zach Davis: It was a fair count I must say. Jakobs now looking to put Tek in a crossface, a submission hold! And Tek looks to really be feeling the effects of it.
Shannan Lerch: Price now asking Tek if he wants to quit. Tek indicating he does not. He inches himself toward the bottom rope. Inches away, these are some agonizing seconds for Tek.
Zach Davis: He inches closer and closer and, there, he’s got the bottom rope. Jakobs not releasing the hold though.
Zach Davis: With Jakobs not releasing the hold, looks like Price is interjecting himself into the match and he’s forcefully pulling Jakobs off of Tek. He pushes Jakobs back and Jakobs does not look happy.
Shannan Lerch: As Tek is recovering, Jakobs now in Price’s face but Price reminding him that he told him he would be fair and that he is simply doing his job. Jakobs now yelling at Price about putting his hands on him. Price yelling right back explaining that he didn’t let go of the hold.
Zach Davis: Price now telling him to concentrate on his opponent. As Tek is now getting up, Jakobs approaches him and wait, looks like Tek nails a belly to belly suplex against Jakobs. Jakobs down as Tek is now gaining the upper hand in this match up.
Shannan Lerch: Looks like the submission took a bit of the wind out of him though.
Zach Davis: Tek is a strong competitor however and he will not give up. As Jakobs is getting up, Tek nailing kick, after kick, after kick to Jakobs’ midsection. As Jakobs is trying to recover here, Tek tries for a superkick but no one home as Jakobs grabs Tek’s leg, turns him and he looks to be trying to apply an Ankle Lock here but he’s unable to lock it in as is able to kick Jakobs back to the ring ropes. Both men now at opposite sides of the ring. They meet up in the center a punch from Jakobs, a punch from Tek, a punch from Jakobs, a punch from Tek and Jakobs now kicks Tek in the midsection. He goes behind Tek and looks like he’s setting him up Torture here as he lands one German suplex on him.
Shannan Lerch: And here goes two. Jakobs has Tek really locked in here. And, a third. Jakobs is simply not letting go here and now, a fourth German suplex!
Zach Davis: And looks like he’s going for it, and oh, Tek looks like he’s trying to stop it here. He’s putting his foot right in Jakobs’ path. But Jakobs hits an elbow to Tek’s head and here we go, a fifth German suplex! As Jakobs releases the grip on Tek.
Shannan Lerch: Cover him!
Zach Davis: Oh, Jakobs is signaling, I think he’s really going to try and put Tek away here. He’s going to the top rope. I don’t know if this is such a wise move, a lot of risk involved here.
Shannan Lerch: But he doesn’t give a damn. He’s determined to make a statement here tonight,
Zach Davis: And he’s going for it, Dance with the Devil and the Press connects! But that took a lot of wind out of him as well.
Shannan Lerch: Is he going to be able to take advantage of such a move. Both men now on the canvas laid out as Jakobs inches closer and closer to Tek. Just a little more, cover!
Zach Davis: And Tek is somehow able to kick out just before 3!
Shannan Lerch: How did he do that? That should have put him away. And look at Jakobs, he looks incredibly frustrated now.
Zach Davis: I think he’s wondering what he’s going to have to do to put Tek away here tonight! Tek showing how resilient he is, how he has that “I will not quit” attitude. Jakobs is frustrated however as he goes outside the ring here. He’s going to the ring announcer’s area and he’s getting a steel chair.
Shannan Lerch: Now it’s going to get interesting.
Zach Davis: This match is being contested under standard rules. If Jakobs uses this chair, it will be a disqualification for him. As Price is tending to Tek to check if he can continue on, Jakobs slides in the ring with the steel chair. He looks intent on hitting Tek. But wait, Price gets in his way and reminds him that it would be an automatic disqualification! Jakobs doesn’t want to seem to let go of that chair as he holds it, Price goes for the chair and steals the chair away from him.
Shannan Lerch: That’s a good job as an official that he’s doing. Taking the weapon away from him.
Zach Davis: Price seems to be holding onto that chair. Tek is getting up and wait, what is he doing?!
Shannan Lerch: Eric Price just hit Tek with a steel chair during this matchup! As Eric throws the chair to the canvas, he has a smile on his face.
Zach Davis: And look at this, he’s telling Jakobs to cover him! He goes for the cover and…
Zach Davis: And Jakobs pins Tek for the victory as both Jonathan Jakobs and Eric Price celebrate this atrocity!
Shannan Lerch: I don’t know what to make of this. Looks like Eric Price is asking for a microphone now, maybe we’ll get some form of explanation.
Eric Price: Hey Tek, you wanted to think for yourself, you wanted to be your own man. You’ve got it, now you have to deal with the consequences of helping yourself!
Zach Davis: And Price hits Tek in the head with that microphone and starts stomping on Tek. And looks like Price is directing traffic here as Jonathan Jakobs is turning Tek around and putting him a sharpshooter as Price stomps on his back. The match is over!
Shannan Lerch: What is the reason for this?!
Zach Davis: And now Price is punching Tek’s head as he’s busted open. Someone has to stop this!
Shannan Lerch: And hey, wait a minute! That’s Hank “Thunder” Lane.
Zach Davis: What’s Thunder doing out here? As he storms the ring. Jakobs immediately lets go of the Sharpshooter and slides out of the ring. Thunder taps Price on the shoulder and as Eric Price turns around and stands up, Lane hits a clothesline on him. Price quickly slides out of the ring here.
Shannan Lerch: And Lane checking up on Tek to make sure he’s okay.
Zach Davis: As both Jakobs and Price make their way up the ramp both Price and Jakobs with sick smiles on their faces as they head to the back. As Lane checks on Tek, Lane looks furious and with blood running down his face, Tek looks furious.
Shannan Lerch: What could have caused this though? Why did Eric Price turn on his friend Tek here tonight?
Zach Davis: A loss and betrayal tonight but what motivated this? A lot of questions that need to be answered after this hideous act tonight!
We go to commercial. When we come back... we're backstage in Tek’s lockerroom. Tek is still in shocked by what happened in the ring with Eric Price and there is a knock at the door.
Hank “Thunder” Lane: Hey, Tek you okay man?
Tek: Yeah, I am okay thanks for the save Hank. And, congrats on the win last week.
Hank “Thunder” Lane: Thanks, man you are getting tougher out there. I mean I didn’t know how last week was going to go. Just the right place at the right time. But I have an idea to run by you.
Tek: What’s that idea?
Hank “Thunder” Lane: Well it, looks like Eric just told you to go fuck yourself and is going to be life partners with Jonathan, and they are going to be doing some two on ones against you. What would you say if I were to be your stable mate; you watch my back and I’ll watch yours. Unlike them who odds are most likely, they’re washing each other’s back.
Tek thinks it over hard for a minute or two. Then sticks his hand out and Hank shakes Tek’s hand.
Tek: You got it, I might be nice right now but don’t take my niceness as my weakness, that would be a figment of your imagination.
We are backstage once again as we see Famine going into Seth Lerch's office. Seth is sitting at his desk talking on the phone to someone as Famine walks in and takes the phone from him.
Famine: He'll call you back.
Seth Lerch: What the hell do you think you're doing?
Famine: We need to talk. Now!
Seth Lerch: Weren't you told a few weeks back that you don't run things around here?
Famine: Yeah, yeah you're the guy running shit I get it. I need you to approve a match between me and Twilight at the next pay per view. I need this to end once and for all.
Seth Lerch: Famine, don't you pay attention? Sarah is already booked for Blast, she's defending her Tag Team Titles against the winners of the Trios Cup tournament. But I'll tell you what. The fans have been clamoring to see you and Sarah go at it for months now, and after Blast, Ultimate Showdown is right around the corner... What match do you have in mind?
Famine: I'll save those details for later when I officially make the announcement. But I tell you this, after this match, it's over. Famine and Twilight will never face off again.
Seth Lerch: Why is that?
Famine: Because no one has survived this match since I created it ten years ago. I have been undefeated in it and that will continue. So do we have a deal?
Seth Lerch: Fine. As long as it involves wrestling inside of a ring and not tearing apart anything we have to pay for, you got it.
Famine walks away smiling as Seth sits there thinking about what he's just agreed to.
Zach Davis: This doesn't sound good. He just approved a match and doesn't even know what it is. Last time he did that, we got the Euthanasia Chamber.
Shannan Lerch: We'll find out later tonight. I don't have a good feeling about this.
Zach Davis: You and me both.
'Riding The Storm Out' by REO Speedwagon begins playing on the Jumbo-Tron as Hank 'Thunder' Lane makes his way towards the ring. He is wearing a long Satin robe with Thunder on the back of it in Diamonds. As he passes by the announcers table he grabs a mic from one of them and takes it into the ring with him.
Hank 'Thunder' Lane: Now I want ALL of you Fat, Disgusting, Out of shape worthless pieces of crap to close your eyes while I take my robe off! Your eyes don't deserve to gaze upon a body as fine as this!
He throws the mic down and takes his robe off. His Muscular body is glistened with sweat and shines under the light. He has on a pair of Black wrestling trunks with Thunder on the back of them. The crowd is a mixture of cheers and boos as he awaits his opponents.
The Lights Shut off and My Name By Eminem FT Xzibit Blasts Through the Speakers and Green smoke fills the entrance ramp as red and blue lights flash through out the crowd and Nic Daniels Walks Out With the Lovely Gina Caldwell as they both Walk through the smoke then look into the crowds for their reaction, He then looks at Gina Nods then Heads down to the ring as he poses into the ring as Gina Caldwell Claps at ring side as Nic waits for his opponents.
American Capitalist by Five Finger Death Punch is blasted through the arena. After the intro of the song is finished, the pyro starts blasting out everywhere in the arena. The ramps, the stage, the ring, titantron, everything in the arena. Coming out from backstage is Joel Hall. The crowd starts to cheer for his arrival. He walks down the ramp and jumps on the canvas. Then, he rolls into the ring and looks at the crowd. He gives the devil horns sign.
~*~ 4:19 ~*~
Flashes over the titantron, as green smoke begins to fill the entry way. The arena goes completely black and then
Cold by Crossfade plays over the loud speaker as out struts the Paragona of Americana , LA Johnny Stylez. Stylez moves with the rhythm of the music while yelling at the crowd. Naturally Stylez is met with a course of boos so loud that it almost shakes the arena. Stylez is dressed in a pair of baggy cargo pants and he is wearing a P.o.P T-shirt Outsiderâ€™s style. On the front of the shirt is P.o.P in white bold letters with (Players of Perfection) written in captions. Stylez is wearing a pair of silver oakleys and he has a cigarette hanging from his lips. After dancing to his music and taunting the fans, Stylez makes his way down the ramp.
-What I Really Meant To Say-
Stylez arrogantly struts to the ring, stopping to blow smoke in the face of a few fans sitting front row. Stylez then puts his cigarette out, and slides in the ring on his stomach. He then shoots up and immeadily begins talking trash to the fans, who are letting him have it. Stylez walks up to the ring announcer and playfully slaps them over the head a few times, before walking over to the turnbuckle and laying across it pretending to fall asleep as he awaits the bell.
Zach Davis: And there is the Internet Champion. Here we go!
Stylez goes right on the attack, running at Daniels, but Lane and Hall intercept him, hitting him with a Double Clothesline. Lane and Hall stomps at Stylez repeatedly before Lane turns on Hall, throwing him to the ropes and hitting a Belly to Belly Suplex, with Hall landing on top of Stylez!
Shannan Lerch: Oof! What a move!
Daniels runs at Lane, but Lane hits a Back Bodydrop, sending Daniels flying over the top rope and to the outside. Lane picks Stylez up and then back down with a Snap Suplex. He floats over and pins.
No, Stylez kicks out. Hall is up though, he grabs Lane from behind and spins him around, kicking him stiff in the gut and then executing an Underhook Powerbomb! Hall falls onto Lane, pinning.
Daniels kicks Hall off. Now Stylez is back up, he grabs Daniels and hits him with an X-Factor! Daniels rolls out of the ring. Stylez now stomps at both Lane and Hall, trying to keep them down. But slowly, they both work their way to their feet. Lane and Hall throw Stylez to the ropes and then hit him with a Double Flapjack as he comes back. Stylez rolls out.
Zach Davis: No love for the Internet Champion.
Hall and Lane begin brawling in the ring now, back and forth. Lane uses his strength to get the upper hand, and takes Hall up with a Vertical Suplex. Lane then climbs to the top...
Shannan Lerch: Hank Lane, going high risk!
Lane flies off with a Flying Elbowdrop! He pins Joel Hall, hooking his leg.
No!, Joel Hall kicks out!
Zach Davis: Joel Hall, once again showing lots of heart!
Stylez, from out of nowhere, Springboards over the top rope and hits Hank Lane with a Roundhouse Kick! Hank Lane stumbles back into a turnbuckle, Stylez runs at him and goes for a Clothesline, but Lane drills him with a Standing Dropkick! This gives Joel Hall the opportunity to grab Lane from behind and puts him in a Full Nelson Hold, then hits a Facebuster!
Shannan Lerch: TEARS DON'T FALL!
Joel pins Lane!
No!, Daniels pulls Hall out of the ring to break up the pin. Daniels throws Hall into the ring steps before he slides in himself. He picks Lane up, throws him to the turnbuckle, but Lane reverses it and sends Daniels into the turnbuckle instead. Lane quickly lifts him up... and hits a Vertical Suplex off the top!
Zach Davis: He's going for his Stormy Night Suplex, let's see if he can finish the combination-
Indeed!, Lane flies off the top and hits the Frog Splash onto Daniels!
NO!, Stylez grabs Lane and quickly throws him out of the ring and onto Joel Hall! Stylez quickly pulls the injured Daniels into the middle of the ring and locks him in a modified Texas Cloverleaf!
Shannan Lerch: Stylez is giving Nic Daniels the Business!
Daniels is forced to tap out!
Zach Davis: Aanndd there you have it.. Stylez steals the win.
Stylez stands up and is handed the Internet Title. He grins, raising high in the air to a chorus of boos.
Shannan Lerch: Fantastic match. Styles just stole it from Lane and Hall, but that's the way he is!
The End Of Heartache by Killswitch Engage begins to play as Famine of the Vile makes his way out to the ring. The fans all boo in unison as the Demon King walks down the ramp with a smile on his face.
Zach Davis: What's he so happy about?
Shannan Lerch: It's got something to do with this match. I know it!
Famine walks up the steel steps and through the ropes. He walks over to ask for a mic as the music dies down.
Famine: Would you all please shut the hell up for a moment? Show some respect when someone is out here to speak.
The boos grow even louder.
Famine: Fine. Keep booing. I'll talk over you. Now, the reason I'm out here is because earlier this evening, Seth Lerch gave me the OK to have a match against that red headed nuisance Sarah Twilight. You all know what's been going on the last few months so I won't go over it. But what I will go over is the match that will take place at the aptly named Ultimate Showdown.
Zach Davis: Here it comes!
Famine: Sarah, I hope you're paying real close attention because I am about to introduce you to your final resting place. This place has been the final resting place for many, MANY wrestlers throughout the last ten years. It's a place I created and a place that could only come from the sadistic mind of someone like me. Allow me to introduce you to....The Devil's Playground!
The cameras switch to the tron where a picture of a monstrous structure appears, loosely appearing like an Elimination Chamber.
Shannan Lerch: What the fuck is that?!
Zach Davis: It's exactly what he said. A final resting place. That thing looks sick!
Famine: That right there is my baby. Let me explain how this is going to work Sarah. You and I are going to get into that ring, have the cage surround us and the winner will be the one who is still standing. There is no way out despite the two gates you see open. I should warn you. I have never lost inside of that cage and I don't plan on starting now. So I hope you start to pray to whatever god or gods you believe in. Because if you don't. Not only will I destroy you, but I will own your very soul. THAT I guarantee!
Famine then drops the mic and starts to walk out of the ring as his music hits once again.
Zach Davis: Good lord. Has Sarah gotten in over her head?
Shannan Lerch: I don't know, Zach, but I do know that it's going to be a bloody and fierce battle inside of that monstrosity.
"John" by Li'l Wayne plays and out from the back walks Bishop. Bishop throws his arms up as he looks around at the crowd. He walks down the ramp and climbs into the ring.
Kyle Steel: The following contest is a special first-blood match! First, on his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 320 pounds and hailing from Miami, Florida... THIS IS BISHOP!
Zach Davis: And here we go tonight on Slam with this first blood grudge match!
Shannan Lerch: Not to brag, but I had my first blood when I was twelve.
Zach Davis: ...
"Still Counting" by Volbeat hits the PA... Tommy Kain makes his way down to the ring with a signature bottle of Evan Williams (Because Jack Daniels is for rednecks.) He gives the crowd a smirk that just screams, "Damn I know I'm better than you." Finally making his way to the ring, sliding under the bottom rope and sitting in one of the corners taking a drink or two from his pre-match bottle of booze.
Kyle Steel: And his opponent, weighing in at 228 lbs and hailing from Indianapolis, Indiana... TOMMY KAIN!
Zach Davis: Strong words have been exchanged all week between Bishop of the Dark Side and WCF newcomer Tommy Kain, who's recently found himself an ally in Johnny Stylez.
Shannan Lerch: Johnny Stylez is the biggest thing on the Internet since GOATSE.
Bishop and Kain square off and begin trading punches; Kain ducks a punch and hits Bishop with an uppercut. Bishop just shouts at him; Kain takes him to the mat with a haymaker. He shouts to the crowd.
Zach Davis: And both of these young lions are roaring here tonight - quite literally, I might add!
Shannan Lerch: What do you think of this Tommy Kain, Zach? I think he's a sweetie.
Zach Davis: You really do know how to pick them, don't you?
Bishop tackles Kain and begins striking him about the face. Bishop picks Kain up, drags him to the turnbuckle and slams his head into it.
Shannan Lerch: He even kinda reminds me of Jay Price a little bit.
Kain 'hulks up' a bit, then begins smashing Bishop's head into the turnbuckles...
Crowd: 1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6!
Zach Davis: And there's a six-pack for Bishop!
Kain spears Bishop into the corner. Bishop goes down. Kain goes outside and throws in the timekeeper's bell.
Shannan Lerch: Is it over already?
Zach Davis: No... I think Tommy Kain's appropriated some of the ring equipment here!
Shannan Lerch: So he's a handyman, then. Ooh. I've got some plumbing he could work on...
Kain climbs in and Bishop grabs him, dropping him with a sidewalk slam.
Zach Davis: Bishop was just waiting for him... and now the Dark Side's back in charge of this match!
Bishop goes out and gets a chair... as he returns to the ring, Kain charges towards him with a dropkick, which Bishop dodges. Bishop cracks Kain with a chairshot.
Zach Davis: And Bishop knocks Tommy Kain flat with a huge home-run swing!
Shannan Lerch: That had to bust Kain open... lord knows I'd be out after that... especially after all that whiskey... or a few pills...
Zach Davis: Referee Philip Bailey checks Tommy Kain, but there's no signal to end the match so we're assuming Bishop didn't bust him open with that chairshot... though I'm not sure how.
Zach Davis: AND TOMMY KAIN CRACKS BISHOP WITH THAT RING BELL! Tommy Kain's full of Tennessee courage and he's not laying down easy!
Kain bounces off the ropes and hits the KWI (Kneeing While Intoxicated - Shining Wizard). As Bishop struggles to get up, Kain takes the chair and shoves it between the 2nd and 3rd turnbuckles - he drags Bishop over to them...
Zach Davis: Kain's probably looking for a slingshot here... Bishop kicks Kain in the face! Kain's slumped in the turnbuckles and Bishop's back up!
Bishop stands quickly and then scoops Kain out of the turnbuckles, rushing towards and then nailing a tombstone piledriver onto the ringbell.
Shannan Lerch: God, stop the ringing already! Some of us are hung over.
Zach Davis: What a brutal running tombstone piledriver onto the ringbell! These two have taken it to each other as hard as we've seen in a while here on Slam...
Bishop drags Kain up, swinging Kain face-first into the chair... so hard, in fact, that Tommy Kain flips up and over the turnbuckle to the outside of the ring. Referee heads out to check Kain: he is not bleeding, match continues.
Zach Davis: Tommy Kain is still not busted open here even after getting his head smashed with that chair AND getting tossed out of the ring! What's it going to take to make the blood flow here tonight?
Shannan Lerch: We could have started these two off with box cutters.
Bishop picks up Kain and tosses him into the guardrail; he crotches Kain on the guardrail and then hits a big boot to the chest taking Kain into the second row.
Zach Davis: And here we go into the audience! Bishop just kicked Tommy Kain into the crowd... and now he's headed in after him!
Bishop climbs over the rail; from the ground, Tommy Kain throws an open chair at Bishop cracking him in the face and sending him back up against the rail. Kain then dives at Bishop, knocking both men back over the rail and onto the floor.
Shannan Lerch: Oh man, that is a serious sweaty man-pile right there...
Zach Davis: You can say that again, Shannan- but save it for later in the show! The referee's checking them out and Kain and Bishop are both still good to go, so this match is continuing...
Kain drags Bishop over to the ringsteps and hits a double-underhook piledriver (Tommy-Driver). Referee Philip Bailey checks out Bishop, who has been busted Bishop open.
Kyle Steel: Your winner of the match... TOMMY KAIN!
Zach Davis: The referee's bringing Tommy Kain back into the ring to raise his hand, and Bishop is just glaring angrily rubbing his bleeding forehead... AND HERE COMES PRIEST! Priest slides into the ring and starts pounding on Tommy Kain... a huge knee-lift by Pr- HERE COMES JOHNNY STYLEZ! Stylez is in the ring in a second, and he knocks Priest up against the ropes with a running dropkick!
Shannan Lerch: Religion vs. Internet - this should be a great fight!
Zach Davis: Kain and Stylez are pounding on Priest, but here comes Bishop! He grabs Stylez by the hair... OH MY GOD WHAT A LARIAT! Kain gets a huge beal out of the ring... and now Stylez and Kain are headed up the ramp, yelling back to Bishop and Priest that this isn't over!
Shannan Lerch: A pothead and an alcoholic fighting 'the Dark Side'... since when did this show get so existential?
Zach Davis: What does 'existential' mean, Shannan?
Shannan Lerch: I don't know. I read it in an e-mail this morning. You know what this match was missing? A pony.
Crowd: Bobby C! Bobby C! Bobby C!
The chant continues as darkness comes over the arena and "I'm Not Done" by Fever Ray hits the speakers at maximum volume. Sparkly fireworks illuminate the entrance as Bobby Cairo appears, looking dapper in a black suit with white pinstripes, though he does not look happy.
"So, I lost my head a while ago, but you seem to have done no better.
The only thing louder than Cairo's entrance music is the cheer of the crowd. Cairo salutes his fans and then makes his way down the ramp, slapping five and shaking hands with delirious fans along the way, though he still seems perturbed.
"Some do magic, and some do harm.
Cairo reaches the ring and walks up the steps before flipping over the top rope and into the ring. Cairo climbs the turnbuckles and salutes the fans once again, with both arms raised into the air and a gritty look of determination upon his face.
"Who is the Alpha? And what is made of cloth?
The lights return to the arena as Cairo climbs down from the turnbuckles. Bobby is handed a microphone by the sexy blonde ringside attendant, whom he winks at and sends away with a firm slap on the ass.
"One thing I know for certain, ohhh I'm pretty sure.
Crowd: Bobby C! Bobby C! Bobby C!
Cairo doesn't say anything. He just stands in the middle of the ring and stares out at the crowd, absorbing their adoration with a subtle glee.
Zach Davis: Cairo is enjoying a hero's welcome from these Reading fans, but he can't be too happy after his run-in with the Southern Rogue Doc Henry last week.
Shannan Lerch: Knowing Bobby I'm sure he has a few choice words for Doc.
Cairo licks his lips, savoring the combination of peach cobbler and vaginal juices, before finally lifting the mic to his mouth and speaking.
Bobby Cairo: I appreciate that warm reception, ladies and gentlemen, but you'll have to excuse me if I'm not in a good mood tonight. It hasn't been the best week for me. I've had a lot on my mind lately and most of it has to do with Doc Henry.
Crowd: Booooo! Booooo! Doc's a redneck! Doc's a redneck! Doc's a redneck!
Bobby nods his head in agreement, a mopey look plastered upon his face.
Bobby Cairo: Last week I was betrayed by a man that I trusted, a man that I thought was my friend. Doc Henry! You were counting cards, motherfucker!
Cairo scowls into the camera lens as if looking straight into Doc's soul.
Bobby Cairo: That's not why I'm out here though. I'm out here because you double-crossed me. Let's review, shall we? Last week you invited me to join you in your locker room for a good old-fashioned game of high stakes poker, like we've played countless times before. This was to be followed by, in your words, the interracial orgy to end all interracial orgies. Obviously you did not need to say another word. I was hooked. This promise of multi-ethnic vajayjay did not come to fruition, however.
Bobby lowers the mic and lets out a heavy sigh. He shakes his head and then lifts the mic to his lips again.
Bobby Cairo: During the game you had your lady friends spike my drinks so that I wouldn't be able to keep my wits about me, then when you had me all wonky on roofies or whatever that shit was, you made your move. That sexy wife of yours pulled out that .45 and you blind-sided me with a sneak attack, put my ass through a table with your Gambler's Hand. That's cowardly shit, Doc. That's rat shit. That's punk shit. That's not the conduct of a true Son of the South. It's also... not smart.
Cairo takes a few halting, angry breaths.
Bobby Cairo: I'm not sure why you thought you could tease the Six Inches of Steel with that sweet pussy and then yank it away from me. I'm not sure why you thought you could lay your grubby little Confederate paws on Bobby Cairo and get away with it. I am not the one to fuck with, Doc. You should know that as well as anyone. You and I have been running together for a long time. You know how I operate. They call Logan the Face of Treachery, but I am much scarier than anything that man's twisted brain could concoct. How do you think I became a power player in the cutthroat worlds of business AND politics? You think I've been washing my hands with Ivory liquid for all these years, Doc? I bathe in the blood of babes. I am the Gestapo. Any pretense of jurisprudence is shattered when you step into my world. I am not a... "nice man".
Cairo's eyes grow cold and dead as they stare into the camera. His rage has dissipated. Bobby is beyond angry now. He's gone into full-blown sociopath mode.
Bobby Cairo: Do you see where I'm headed with this, Doc? Now, now...
Cairo holds his hand up as a deceptive sort of calm briefly rears its head, as if trying to get your guard down.
Bobby Cairo: Maybe you made an honest mistake. You thought you were being loyal to your ToT comrades, especially that broken down piece of shit Logan. How could you have known that after you sent your little message to Bobby Cairo, Logan would puss out in his World Title match against Jonny Fly and just.. disappear? Nobody could have figured that, right? See, I get all of that, I really do. But, Doc...
A sinister smile creeps across Bobby's ruggedly handsome face, betraying his implied sympathy for Doc.
Bobby Cairo: You will have to walk down to this ring and convince me that I should forgive you for your sins against Bobby Cairo and Pantheon. Bear in mind that I am not a very forgiving man, but I am a reasonable man. After all I did a great job of running WCF while Seth was locked up, didn't I? I saved this company from going under. I breathed new life into WCF when no one else was willing to take the reins and bear the responsibility of leadership. Now why don't you bring that sexy ass wife of yours down to the ring with you and we can talk about making a deal?
The fans clamor and cheer for the possibility of a Cairo/Henry showdown as a feeling of electricity fills the air.
Zach Davis: Is Doc Henry going to make his way out here and meet with Cairo?
Shannan Lerch: I don't know, Zach. Frankly I'm not sure that coming out here would be a wise move on Doc's part after the stunt he pulled last week.
Zach Davis: We do know that Doc is in the building. He's booked on the card tonight.
With no immediate sign of Doc, the fans begin to grow restless. Cairo stands in the ring with his arms folded, staring up at the entrance ramp, waiting for Doc to show. After a while Cairo grits his teeth in frustration and raises the mic to his lips.
Bobby Cairo: I can see that Doc only has the courage to face me when it's a set-up so I'll just have to go back there and find him myself--
Bobby is abruptly cut off when "Dr. Feelgood" hits the speakers. As the main riff blasts through the arena, Doc and Mary emerge on the stage, the Confederate Title strapped around his waist. Doc looks straight into the ring at Cairo, never taking his eyes off of the US Senate candidate and WCF Hall of Famer. Doc proceeds toward the ring with Mary at his side. He keeps his eyes fixed on Cairo as he walks up the ring steps and climbs in through the ropes, holding them open for Mary. Doc is handed a mic by the attendant. He keeps close to the ropes, along with Mary, wary of a possible attack by Cairo, though not showing any fear. Doc clears his throat and then lifts the mic to his mouth.
Doc Henry: You want to make a deal, Bobby? You want to negotiate with me?
Doc arches an eyebrow while tapping his chest with an index finger.
Doc Henry: Negotiation is typically reserved for those who find themselves in a position of leverage. You're powerless, Bobby. You're not the make-believe president of WCF anymore, remember? Seth Lerch is back and ToT is once again runnin' the show!
Doc hoists a clenched fist to the sky while the crowd unleashes a hot torrent of boos at him. Bobby flashes a conciliatory smile at Doc, between sneaking peaks at Mary's boobs.
Bobby Cairo: You're right about one thing, Doc: I am no longer the interim president of WCF. In that regard my work is done, and it was done well I might add. However you're wrong about me being powerless.
Doc Henry: How d'ya figure? You can't book matches. You can't stop the Team of Treachery from runnin' roughshod over WCF and takin' all the titles. Face it, man, you're just a monkey-boy for Fly.
Doc smirks at Bobby while the fans respond with loud, angry boos.
Bobby Cairo: That...
Cairo begins laughing. It starts with a chuckle and crescendos into a full-on laughing fit. Eventually Cairo doubles over while holding his sides to prevent them from splitting. Doc and Mary exchange confused glances, unsure what Cairo finds so damn funny. Cairo finally gains his composure. He wipes the tears from his eyes.
Bobby Cairo: That is certainly one perspective, Doc, although you are sadly mistaken. You have no idea what's going on here and that's precisely what makes this so damned funny to me.
In an instant, a swarm of large men wearing black suits and sunglasses jump over the security barrier and surround each side of the ring. They look like Secret Service agents, though it's impossible to say for sure whether they are. One thing is for certain: These men are preventing any possible escape from the occupants of the ring. Doc and Mary frantically peer around and realize that they've been surrounded. There's a frenzied look in their eyes, nervousness more than fear. Doc does his best to comport himself as he pulls Mary close.
Doc Henry: What the hell is this?
Bobby Cairo: Oh this? This is a trap, my friend. This is...
Cairo looks as if he's searching for the right words.
Bobby Cairo: This is bad news for you.
Cairo's smile exudes arrogance and an air of menace. Doc and Mary look on with concern.
Bobby Cairo: I'm not this jovial, easy-going guy that everybody seems to think I am. I'm not like my former protege Chad Evans, the supposed working-class hero. I am vindictive. I am spiteful. I hold grudges. Petty grudges, Doc. Imagine what I'm feeling towards you right now?
Cairo tweaks his nose and sniffles like a cokehead. He glances at Doc, then glances at any one of the men in black suits, then back at Doc.
Bobby Cairo: You thought you could take advantage of me because, in your mind, I was going to "play by the rules."
Cairo makes air quotes with his hands as he says those words.
Bobby Cairo: You thought I believed in fairness and nobility just because I've aligned myself with two of the nicest guys in this business, Kid Phantasm and Jeff Purse. You thought that because I'm friends with the newly reformed Jonny Fly, that I've been reformed as well. You thought I wouldn't play dirty, bend the rules, pull out all the stops.
Cairo motions toward the silent mob of hired muscle that surrounds the ring.
Bobby Cairo: Like I said, Doc... Sadly mistaken.
Doc Henry: Now wait just one damn minute here, Cairo! I don't know what you're tryin' to pull, but the ToT ain't gonna tolerate this kind of BS! Seth and FPV are back there and--
Bobby puts his hands up, silencing Doc's protests.
Bobby Cairo: Shh. They can't save you, Doc. These men that surround the ring are Secret Service agents. They've been trained to kill a man thirty-seven different ways before he hits the ground, and that's just with the knuckle technique. How do you think they got past WCF security?
Zach Davis: The knuckle technique? That's my move!
Shannan Lerch: Yeah and you couldn't even get me off with it, Zach.
Bobby Cairo: No one is entering or exiting this ring without my authorization. So, that being said, let's talk turkey.
In a fit of desperation, Mary reaches for the nickel .45 that's strapped to her, well, use your imagination. Unfortunately for Mary, Cairo is quicker to the draw with his pearl-handled revolver. And, of course, the entire swarm of Secret Service agents have their weapons drawn and aimed at Mary's generous bosom. Several red dots also appear on Mary's chest as if sniper rifles have been fixated on her from unseen locales.
Bobby Cairo: Do NOT do that.
Mary looks up and around and quickly realizes her predicament. She finds herself frozen in mid-draw.
Bobby Cairo: Uh-uh. Nice and slow. Put the gun on the ground and kick it over to me.
Mary does as she's told while Doc angrily looks on. Doc is positively fuming.
Doc Henry: You got no right treatin' a lady like this, Cairo!
Bobby Cairo: I beg to differ. As much as I enjoyed that naked spear from Mary last week, I'm not about to have her point a gun at me again.
Cairo kicks Mary's gun toward a far corner of the ring, where one of the agents retrieves it.
Bobby Cairo: Now that you understand my position, I'm going to tell you what is going to happen. As you know, Doc, I proclaimed that you were a dead man after you ambushed me last week.
Doc swallows hard, his face showing grave concern though not revealing any fear. Mary nervously hugs her husband, her eyes swelled with fear.
Bobby Cairo: Oh relax. I'm not going to shoot you. On national television? With a crowd filled with witnesses? Please, I'm not daft. No, I'm not going to shoot either of you, but I am going to strong-arm you.
Zach Davis: Is Cairo going to have sex with Doc and Mary right there in the ring!?
Shannan Lerch: I don't think that's what he meant, Zach.
Bobby Cairo: I thought about the best way to get my revenge on you, Doc. Thought about it long and hard for the past week. I stayed up late at night drinking and toking, toking and drinking, and finally, this morning, it hit me. I'm going to take something from you, Doc. I'm going to take that which is the most important thing in the world to you.
Doc Henry: What are you talkin' about, Cairo? You're out of your mind!
Bobby Cairo: Quite untrue. The way that I see it, there's only two things in this world that really and truly matter to you. There's your lovely wife Mary...
Bobby points the barrel of the revolver at Mary, causing her to flinch, before he withdraws it.
Bobby Cairo: Then there's that...
Cairo points the gun at the shiny gold Confederate Championship belt that Doc is wearing around his waist.
Bobby Cairo: Truth be told I honestly don't know which is more important to you, but I will be satisfied to remove either one from your possession.
Doc grips his woman tight and strokes the polished faceplate of his belt before raising the mic to speak.
Doc Henry: You're not takin' either one from me, Bobby. You can shoot me if you want, but you're not gettin' my wife or my belt.
Cairo's sneer grows increasingly ominous.
Bobby Cairo: Oh but I am, Henry. I'm giving you an ultimatum and you will choose, or it won't be you that I shoot. I didn't want this to get messy, but hell if I have to--
Bobby points his gun at Mary. Doc darts in front of Mary to shield her from harm.
Doc Henry: Hey! That's enough of that, you sunnuva bitch!
Bobby Cairo: Then what's it gonna be? Your bride or your belt? Make a choice, Doc!
Doc Henry: The damn belt!
Cairo raises a brow. He nods his head, as if he's impressed.
Bobby Cairo: I guess what they say is true. Chivalry isn't dead.
Cairo holsters his revolver. Doc and Mary simultaneously exhale in relief. They finally relax after what seemed like an eternity in peril, though it was only a few moments. Doc's bravado quickly returns to him.
Doc Henry: You set all of this up just to get my belt, Bobby? That's a damned coward's game, ya yella Yankee bastard!
Bobby Cairo: Whoa, whoa, whoa. I didn't set this up to get your belt. No, no, not at all. I set this up to get a match with you.
The crowd pops like crazy at the mention of a Cairo/Henry match. In stark contrast, Doc and Mary appear perplexed.
Doc Henry: WHAT!? You did all of this just to get a match? Why didn't ya just challenge me!?
Bobby Cairo: That's old hat. Plus, I couldn't be sure that you would accept. PLUS, I wanted to scare the shit out of you two.
Doc growls with rage, while Mary gestures obscenely at Bobby.
Bobby Cairo: Oh, I understand that you're upset but I have not fully explained my plan yet, so if you wouldn't mind...
Cairo makes a soothing motion with his hand.
Bobby Cairo: Settle down and listen up. I could have very easily challenged you to a match at Blast, but Cairo versus Henry is bigger than Blast. It's bigger than Wells Fargo Center in Philadelphia. Hell, it's bigger than WCF. Don't misunderstand me though. You and I ARE going to have a match, Doc, and you ARE going to put your Confederate Championship on the line. Since you like putting people through tables, it's going to be a tables match. And it's going to happen at XIII in Norway!
The crowd EXPLODES.
Zach Davis: Cairo versus Doc at XIII! Confederate Championship at stake! Tables match!
Shannan Lerch: But will Doc accept!
Zach Davis: Does he have a choice? Those Secret Service agents look like they mean business!
Doc thinks about it for a moment. He whispers into Mary's ear and she whispers into his. Eventually he raises the mic to his lips.
Doc Henry: Why in the hell should I agree to that?
Bobby Cairo: You already know the answer to that question.
Cairo strokes the weapon in his holster.
Bobby Cairo: Since I am a sporting gent, I'll sweeten the pot for you, Doc. I'm proposing that our match shouldn't just be a Confederate Championship match. It should be a championship unification match!
Doc Henry: What the hell are you talkin' about? You don't have no championship!
Bobby Cairo: Wrong again, Doc.
The ladies in the Arena go wild with high-pitched shrieks of orgasm as Cairo strips his suit jacket and dress shirt from his body to reveal that he's wearing a championship belt around his waist. A quick zoom-in by the camera reveals that the inscription on the belt's gold faceplate reads Northern States Imperial Championship.
Bobby Cairo: For most of my wrestling career I have held this belt, the Northern States Imperial Championship. It is not a sanctioned WCF championship. In fact I captured it during my first hiatus from WCF back in 2006. Since then I have regularly defended it, having only been defeated for it once. That was by Canadian hardcore wrestling legend LuFisto. As you can plainly see it is once again around my waist and I have no intention of ever losing it again. Outside of my reign as WCF World Champion, this is the most significant title reign of my career, Doc. You pride yourself on representing the Confederacy as its champion? Well, I pride myself on representing the Union as its champion. What do you say we have ourselves a redux of the Civil War at XIII and put both of our belts on the line? First man to put his opponent through a table walks away with all the gold.
Doc ponders Cairo's surprising offer. He paces the ring for a minute and looks toward Mary, then looks toward Bobby.
Doc Henry: Fine, I'll play your game, but since my Confederate Championship will be at stake, our little brouhaha will be contested via the rules set down when the belt was formed.
Cairo wastes no time in replying.
Bobby Cairo: No problem, Doc. You got any stips you wanna add? You go right ahead.
Doc holds his hand up, silencing Cairo.
Doc Henry: There's one more thing. I want the real Bobby Cairo, not some pussy hiding behind hired thugs, even if they are Secret Service.
Cairo smiles. He snaps his fingers, and in an instant the Secret Service agents disappear into the crowd without a trace, as if they were never there in the first place. Now it's Doc's turn to smile.
Doc Henry: You don't know the Devil you just invited into your world...
In the blink of an eye Doc makes a beeline toward Cairo, attempting to strike Bobby in the head with his microphone. Cairo alertly dodges the assault and backflips over the top rope, then hops off the ring apron. Bobby chuckles at Doc while Doc fumes in the ring, his teeth clenched as a scowl forms on his face. Cairo's music hits the PA while the fans at ringside clamor to touch his arm or ass or whatever they can reach.
Zach Davis: Wow! The tension and animosity between Cairo and Henry is immense! Former friends turned bitter enemies!
Shannan Lerch: As if that weren't enough, Doc Henry has apparently agreed to put his Confederate Championship on the line in a title unification bout against Bobby Cairo and his Northern States Imperial Championship! Is that really going to happen, in a tables match at XIII in Norway of all places? Are we going to have a rematch of the Civil War here in WCF?
Zach Davis: It looks that way, Shannan, and I for one cannot wait!
"Flashlight" by Parliament Funkadelic plays over the PA.
Shannan Lerch: We're back, and here comes Steve Orbit coming to face Odin Balfore in a rematch with the TV title on the line once again.
Zach Davis: We all read on twitter how the Mack begged Odin Balfore for this match to happen, after he foolishly got himself DQ'd last week, costing him the title and basically making himself look like a jackass.
Shannan Lerch: Last week we saw a side of Steve Orbit that we haven't seen thus far in his short career in the WCF. Up until then he had been very methodical and more or less professional, in the ring anyhow. I think his emotions got the best of him last week.
Zach Davis: Let's see if he can reclaim that title this week, or if Odin will shut him up for good.
Steve Orbit walks ahead of Golden Joey, talking to girls who mostly give him disgusted looks, which he is oblivious to and continues blowing kisses and making rude, sexual comments. At ringside he begins the process of taking off whatever pimp attire he is wearing that night, whether its a mink coat, designer suit, etc and always hands his gold chains and his hat to Golden Joey. He continues to "flirt" with the girls in the crowd as he enters the ring.
“With Oden On Our Side” hits the PA system.
Zach Davis: And here comes the Nordic Tank!
Shannan Lerch: Odin is basically a legend here in the WCF, having held multiple titles including two World title runs.
The arena grows dark as the fans get to their feet to catch a glimpse of the stage. The fans stand and cheer an once the vocals starts, the arena lights flash back on and there stands Odin Balfore, centre stage. Odin stares down at the ring with a sinister grin as the fans sing along with the chorus.
Crowd: Futile to resist! You know we have come! Futile to resist... the battle is.. already won!
Crowd: Futile to resist! You know we have come! Futile to resist... the battle is.. already won!
The fans pop insanly right after as Odin begins to walk down the ramp at a slow an methodical pace. Once he gets to the foot of the ring, he steps up on it and looks around the arena again before steping over the ropes..
Crowd: Futile to resist! You know we have come! Futile to resist...
Odin cuts off the fans as he raises his hand in triumph. Odin turns back to the ring as the fans finish their part.
Crowd: The battle is.. already won!
The match starts as Odin and Orbit circle each other in the ring. Steve Orbit talking some trash as Odin just stares him down. They lock up, Odin gets Orbit in a side headlock. Orbit manages to break free and pushes Odin towards the ropes, Odin turns around and hits a huge right hand knocking Orbit flat on his back. Orbit bounces back to his feet almost as quickly as he went down.
Shannan Lerch: I guess Steve Orbit can take a hit on the chin.
They lock up again, this time Odin whips Orbit into the ropes, Orbit ducks a clothesline and continues running, hitting the ropes on the opposite side of the ring. He comes back and hits Odin with a dropkick, Odin stumbles a couple steps back but stays on his feet. Orbit starts chopping at Odin's chest.
Zach Davis: The Mack can not try to overpower the big man, he will never win that way.
The two men exchange blows, with Odin eventually getting the upper hand and hitting a hard European uppercut followed by a snap mare. Odin sits Orbit up.
Zach Davis: Now Odin's got that huge arm around Orbit's neck, I can't tell if it's a choke hold or a sleeper.
Shannan Lerch: With arms like Odin I don't think there's a difference.
Odin wrenches his arm tighter around Orbit. Orbit is swinging his arms trying to connect to Odin's body and head but barely connecting with much force. Eventually Odin lets go of the hold and with Orbit still sitting, Odin hits him with a knee to the back of the head which sends him face down into the mat.
Zach Davis: Odin rolls him over and here's the first pin attempt.
Shannan Lerch: Kickout at two, now both men are on their feet.
Odin and Orbit lock up again, this time Orbit manages to sweep one of Odin's legs and send him to the mat. Orbit quickly follows by leaping in the air and dropping a fist on Odin's forehead. With Odin holding his head, Orbit goes to the turnbuckle and...
Zach Davis: Big top-turnbuckle elbowdrop from the Mack!
Shannan Lerch: This is the only way he's gonna win this thing, by keeping Odin on the mat.
Orbit continues stomping Odin, holding the ropes for extra leverage. Odin slides out of the ring for a moment to regain himself as Orbit with out warning launches himself over the ropes.
Zach Davis: Top rope vault, caught by Odin!
Odin presses Orbit over his head and heaves him back into the ring. Odin climbs back into the ring as Orbit gets right back to his feet..
Shannan Lerch: Odin with that falling double knee smash. I think he calls it the Resurrection.
Odin goes to pick up Orbit but gets a slap in the face. Odin goes to pick him up with both hands but Orbit counters putting Odin in a side head lock.
Zach Davis: Orbit doing good keeping Odin grounded.
Orbit wrenches at Odin's neck as the ref checks the submission. Orbit wrenches harder as Odin starts to go blue in the face but he manages to prop himself up on an arm.
Shannan Lerch: Odin reverses into a school boy pin.
Zach Davis: Kick out again by Orbit.
Odin lets up as Orbit manages to roll out to the apron. Orbit stands up as Odin charges..
Orbit hits a shoulder to Odin's gut...
Shannan Lerch: Pimp Slap!
Zach Davis: And The Mack brushes his shoulder off, no sweat for Steve Orbit.
With Odin on the ground, Orbit grabs one of his legs and twists his foot in an ankle lock. While the ref is checking on Odin, Orbit stomps him right in the nuts, while still twisting on the ankle.
Zach Davis: At least he did it when the ref wasn't looking this week.
Odin manages to crawl over and grab the rope to break the hold. As he gets back to his feet, Orbit runs to the opposite ropes, and comes back with a diving forearm smash.
Zach Davis: Steve Orbit with another pin attempt.
Shannan Lerch: Odin gets a shoulder up!
Orbit takes a breather and walks around the ring, letting Odin get back to his feet. Orbit moves right in with a series of chops and kicks to Odin's body and legs.
Zach Davis: Crane kick by Steve Orbit!
Shannan Lerch: He looked just like the Karate Kid with that one.
Zach Davis: The re-make with Will Smith's kid, maybe.
As Odin gets back to his feet, Orbit grabs him and goes to whip him into the ropes, but Odin reverses it. Orbit comes back and...
Shannan Lerch: The Mack tries a crossbody but gets caught!
Zach Davis: BIG powerslam by Odin Balfore! Steve Orbit felt that one!
Shannan Lerch: Orbit just gets the shoulder up.
Odin picks Orbit back up and lifts him up in the air but Orbit kicks off and runs to the buckle.
Zach Davis: Orbit runs up the turnbuckle! Body splash attempt..
Shannan Lerch: Odin turns it into a choke slam...
Zach Davis: Ragnarok! That's it, Orbit's gotta be done..
Shannan Lerch: Odin retains the TV title!
The ref hands Odin the TV belt and he raises it into the air. Orbit is starting to stir on the mat.
Zach Davis: And Steve Orbit is visibly upset, pounding on the mat in frustration.
Shannan Lerch: He was impressive in this match, but Odin is the clear victor tonight.
Odin begins to leave the ring, as Orbit appears to be having some words with the ref.
The scene opens up backstage where WCF interviewer, Hank Brown, is standing with Gravedigger.
Hank Brown: Hank Brown here with Gravedigger. We saw the little promotional video your people put together earlier tonight and I have to say it looked pretty impressive.
Gravedigger: Well of course it was impressive, Hank. It was all about me, Gravedigger, going for the world title. Everything about me is impressive. I look physically impressive. My wins each week are impressive. Hell, my shit is impressive when I drop one in the toilet.
Hank Brown looks disgusted.
Hank Brown: Well, anyway, everyone is wondering if Jayson Stasiak’s appearance in your promo tonight was a sign of his return to WCF as your manager?
Gravedigger shakes his head.
Gravedigger: No, Jayson still works for me at my nightclub, The Graveyard. That job keeps him busy enough that he doesn’t have the desire to return to WCF anytime soon. I’m glad you asked about my manager because I actually do have a manager. In fact, I have two managers and I would like to introduce them all to you now. You all know them from the big screen. They’ve been in some classic movies, even one just a year or so ago and now they’re making their WCF debut as my managers for my upcoming World title match at Blast. I present to you the “Italian Stallion” Rocky Balboa and his corner man Duke from the Rocky movies.
The crowd pops as Sylvester Stallone walks onto the screen dressed as his Rocky character followed by Tony Burton dressed as the Duke character. Hank looks surprised, then confused and looks back and forth at Gravedigger and then Sylvester Stallone. Hank holds out his hand to Sylvester Stallone.
Hank Brown: Mr. Stallone, it is an honor to meet you.
Stallone shakes Hank’s hand but gives him an odd look. He responds in his Rocky Balboa voice.
Sylvester Stallone: Yo, I don’t know why you callin me, Sylvester. I don’t look like no cat and I sure don’t see no little birdie floatin around here. The name’s Rocky. Rocky Balboa.
Hank Brown still looks confused and looks at Gravedigger who grins.
Hank Brown: Wait, you hired Sylvester Stallone to play his Rocky character to train you for Blast?
Gravedigger gives Hank an “are you serious” look. “Rocky” pokes Hank on the chest with one of his gloves.
Rocky Balboa: First of all, yous gotta start showing me some respect. Don’t sit there talking about me like I’m not here when we both know I’m here because I know I’m here, you see? I ain’t no character but you, you’re a character all right. One I’m starting to not like.
Hank Brown: Yeah but you’re an actor, not a real boxer, Mr. Stallone.
Rocky smirks and turns away slightly and then decks Hank Brown with a huge right, flooring him. A couple of people off screen come running over and check on Hank Brown.
EMT: He’s knocked out cold.
Duke bends down and picks up the microphone that Hank was holding and turns to the camera, Rocky’s left arm around Duke’s shoulders while Gravedigger stands next to them, smirking.
Duke: Let that be a lesson to anyone else that doubts the presence of myself and Rocky here on behalf of Gravedigger. We watched Gravedigger for years on WCF TV and we know how dangerous the man is. Every single one of you back there in the back know that he’s dangerous, too, but now that he called upon myself and Rocky…Gravedigger’s gonna be a force to be reckoned with.
Mr. Fly, you might be the world champion right now, but if my man Rocky has proven anything over the years, it’s that being the champion isn’t a guarantee that you will walk out the champion every time you defend the title. At Blast that will not be more true when my friend Gravedigger steps into the ring and rips that world title from your grasp. The fans, they may cheer you every time you come out to perform or speak on the microphone, but I don’t like a single thing about you. That’s why when Gravedigger called me and asked for me and Rocky to help him in his training and to be in his corner at Blast, I didn’t hesitate for even a second.
June 24th, 2012 will go down as the day that Jonny Fly himself once again goes down to another veteran of WCF. You may have no problems beating all these rookies out there for the world title, but you are sorely mistaken if you think that Gravedigger is going to lose to you. And that is a fact, Jack! Now come on, Digger, let’s go build us some HURTIN’ BOMBS!
Rocky turns and does a flurry of fake punches at Gravedigger’s midsection and then puts his arm around him as the three men walk off-camera. The camera pans down to Hank Brown who is just coming to. The show then goes to commercial.
The house lights dim, and the intro to Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Sweet Home Alabama" hits the speakers. Hushed anticipation falls over the crowd as a spotlight illuminates the stage. Johnny Reb steps out from behind the curtain. A cheer goes up from the audience at his appearance. As he walks down the ramp, a cascade of sparks rains down on the stage. The Inveterate Confederate circles the ring, slapping hands with the fans at ringside. Johnny eschews the steps completely; he leaps onto the ring apron and climbs the turnbuckles, posing for the cheering crowd for a moment before he jumps down, ready for the match to begin.
The vocals of Ayria Adams's No Duh serenade over the P.A. system as The Awesomeness herself makes her way out from behind the curtains. The moment she emerges, the crowd erupts in rage induced fury, throwing their perishables in her general direction. Security tries extra hard to hold back the crowd as some brave souls lean over the railing to give Ayria an earful. Adams spreads her arms spread eagle-like with a facial expression that oozes confidence and awesomeness as she says to the camera, "They love me, they really really love me."
Gingerly making her way down to the ring with her Alaskan swag, she takes time to talk trash with some of the occupants in the front row. A select few loyal fans pay credence to Ayria's Awesomeness, but she ignores them all the same. As usual someone reaches out to touch her but she evades their glancing touch and stares them down before continuing her trot to the squared circle. Upon arrival she slides into the ring, prances around in her best Muhammad Ali impression before spinning around three times with her arms out stretched before dropping down to one knee and flexing.
The people detested her, the little kids booed at the top of their tiny lungs. Adults threw up their middle fingers as the juvenile ones simply gave her a thumbs down.
As the music died down Ayria jumps up on the turnbuckles to face the crowd, taunting them to elevate their hate.
Zach Davis: This is one of those half and half matches.
Shannan Lerch: You mean dude versus chica?
Zach Davis: No. I mean, it is that, but I was referring to the fact that we have one half of the Tag Team Champions facing one half of the number one contenders.
Shannan Lerch: But do we really? We know that Ayria Adams is really Ayria Adams, but is Johnny Reb really Johnny Reb or some sort of creepy Johnny Reb cyborg sent from the future to destroy all humans?
Zach Davis: Shannan, I can't even tell you if I'm really Zach Davis. I'm so high right now I'm about to climb onto the announce table and bust a move to that "Call Me Maybe" song.
Shannan Lerch: Is it playing? I don't hear it.
Zach Davis: Uh yeah, it's playing twenty-four/seven... in my mind!
Reb and Ayria circle each other before locking up mid-ring. Ayria eschews the collar-and-elbow and uses her speed to slip behind Reb with the hammerlock. Reb lands a back elbow flush to Ayria's jaw and the Egg McMuffin of Professional Wrestling stumbles back while holding her jaw. Reb charges at Ayria with a lariat. Ayria ducks the lariat and trips Reb with a drop toe hold. Adams lands a pair of quick elbow drops to Reb's back and then grabs an arm and goes for the Kimura lock. Reb rolls through and slips out of Ayria's McMuffiny grip.
Zach Davis: Little too much McMuffin grease on Ayria's hands that time.
Shannan Lerch: Reb is a crafty veteran. He knows all the tricks of the trade.
Ayria curses at Reb in her Alaskan gangsta thug lingo as both superstars return to their feet. Reb takes exception to a particularly unsavory remark that Ayria made about his mama and responds with hard kicks to the midsection, followed by a springboard bulldog. Ayria slides out of the ring to regroup. Reb builds up a head of steam and flies over the top rope with a suicide plancha that smashes Ayria into the arena floor. Reb takes a moment to recover before returning to his feet and rolling Adams into the ring.
Zach Davis: Truly impressive athleticism by Reb.
Shannan Lerch: Reb's one of the best high fliers in this company, even if he is a creepy cyborg from the future.
Reb snapmares Ayria to the mat and then locks her in a Dragon sleeper.
Zach Davis: Reb's got the Sweet Water Sleeper locked in here!
Shannan Lerch: Ayria is arching her back to try to alleviate the pressure, but she's in a terrible position here. She took a bad bump on the outside of the ring when Reb hit that plancha and now, to compound matters, Reb is cranking on her neck with the Sleeper.
Ayria grits her teeth, her face contorting in pain, as she tries to position herself closer to the ropes. Reb looks determined to coax the tap out as he digs in deeper with his grip and yanks on Ayria's neck. A "McMuffin!" chant breaks out amongst the Adams loyalists in attendance, and this gives Ayria some juice.
Zach Davis: Reb is the fan favorite in this match, no doubt, but Ayria has her support base.
Shannan Lerch: Ayria is a cute Alaskan woman with a brash and cocky demeanor. How can you truly hate her, unless you're the one that she's talking shit to?
Zach Davis: Even then it could be hot.
Shannan Lerch: If you're into kinky tie-up games and femdom?
Zach Davis: Are you offering me your services, Shannan?
Reb is still stretching Ayria in that nasty Sweet Water Sleeper, but Ayria's inching closer to the ropes and Reb starts to loosen his grip, sensing that Adams is going to get to the ropes at any moment. Rather than waste energy pursuing the submission, Reb releases the hold and scoops Ayria from the mat. Reb poses for a half-second before clobbering Adams with his patented Facebreaker DDT as flashbulbs go off around the Arena.
Zach Davis: Reb with the Facebreaker DDT! He's really taking it to Ayria!
Shannan Lerch: You have to wonder if Ayria was looking ahead to the Tag Titles match at Blast and didn't really bother to prepare for this one-on-one match-up.
With Ayria's diminutive body prone on the mat, Reb scales the turnbuckles with ease and prepares to go flying. Adams has other plans however as she bolts to her feet and dropkicks the ropes, crotching Reb on the top turnbuckle. Adams looks disoriented after hitting the move, as if she's running more on instincts at this point than wits, but Reb is the one howling in pain and understandably so. Ayria takes a few seconds to gather herself before climbing onto the turnbuckles. She flips Reb all the way to the mat with a BIG hip toss and then climbs to the top herself.
Zach Davis: Ayria is suddenly in the driver's seat after it looked like she was dead in the water!
Shannan Lerch: Ayria is wily and kind of sneaky, Zach. This is why you have to be careful around her.
Zach Davis: She might crotch you?
Shannan Lerch: Exactly and nobody likes to get crotched, except for the sickos.
Zach Davis: Again, are you offering me your services?
Reb gingerly rises to his feet, his hands instinctively rubbing the feeling back into his groin. Without warning Adams flies off the top rope and hits a diving stunner near the corner.
Zach Davis: Ayria hits the McMuffin Top! She pins Reb!
Slappy Johnson: ONE...
THR--NO!!! FOOT ON THE ROPE!!!
Ayria groans as she hears the news, but she doesn't stay discouraged for long. She drags Reb into the middle of the ring and tries another pin.
Slappy Johnson: ONE...
T--NO!!! KICK OUT!!!
Ayria hops to her feet and gets in the ref's face... or his chest anyway since she's considerably shorter than him.
Zach Davis: Ayria is really giving Slappy a piece of her mind here. She's barking about slow counts and Confederate conspiracies.
Shannan Lerch: Is Slappy a Southerner?
Zach Davis: I think he's from the Ozarks.
Shannan Lerch: Where is that?
Zach Davis: I have no idea. It's in the US, I think.
Ayria plows Reb in the head with her boots, again and again, wearing Reb out with stomps to the cranium.
Zach Davis: Aww isn't that cute?
Shannan Lerch: What? Getting stomped in the head?
Zach Davis: No, I mean Ayria's boots are so tiny. How could those stomps possibly hurt?
Shannan Lerch: I think you need to lay off the herb, Zach.
Zach Davis: It was the powder, thank you very much. I can handle my herb.
Ayria grabs the top rope, hops onto the middle turnbuckle and then springboards onto Reb's chest with a double foot stomp. Reb groans in pain. Ayria smiles, appreciating the pain that she's causing the Inveterate One. Ayria hops onto the ropes again, springboards off and drives her feet into Reb's chest once more.
Zach Davis: Ayria is a cutie pie but she's also exceedingly dangerous. I know that Southern men believe in chivalry and all that jazz, but Reb might want to rethink his code of ethics here. He's getting stomped into paste by a pair of size three wrestling boots.
Shannan Lerch: Well hold on here-- Ayria has backed away from Reb. She's standing in the corner, waiting for Reb to get up--oh shit! Ayria just cracked Johnny in the head with a Shining Wizard!
A spattering of blood flies from Reb's mouth and lands on the canvas before Ayria dives on top of Reb, cradling him for the pin.
Slappy Johnson: ONE...
THRE--NO!!! KICK OUT!!!
Ayria lets the expletives fly, "FUCKDAMMITWHYWONTYOUDIEMUFUCKA!?" and unloads with closed fists to Reb's skull.
Zach Davis: Ayria has snapped. The babe's gone loco.
Shannan Lerch: Those Southern men know how to drive the ladies wild, Zach.
Zach Davis: I wish I was Southern.
Shannan Lerch: I wish you were from Neptune... and you stayed there.
Zach Davis: Rude.
Ayria finally composes herself, and gets to her feet. Adams whips Reb into the ropes, BUT NO Reb reverses! Reb comes to life with a snapping dropkick to the jaw and quickly follows with a double knee lift that sends Ayria reeling into the corner. Reb runs toward Ayria and monkey flips her to mid-ring. With momentum firmly on his side, Reb corkscrews off the ropes and hits a zesty Corkscrew splash that whips the crowd into a frenzy.
Crowd: REB! REB! REB!
Zach Davis: FREE BIRD!
Shannan Lerch: Calm yourself, Davis. Your first name ain't Jefferson.
Reb Irish whips Adams HARD into the turnbuckles. Ayria wobbles forward, nearly tripping over her own feet...
Zach Davis: Inverted Frankensteiner by Reb! He's got the legs hooked!
Slappy Johnson: ONE...
THR--NO!!! KICK OUT!!!
Both superstars kip to their feet, though Ayria is unsteady on hers. Reb goes on the attack with knife-edge chops to the throat and, ahem, chest of his female foe.
Zach Davis: Wow. Ayria's boobies are taking a beating.
Shannan Lerch: Reb looks apologetic, being the Southern Gentlemen that he is, but this is a prototypical Johnny Reb striking attack and he's gotta do what he's gotta do to win the match.
Zach Davis: He's treating the lady like a feller. What more can you ask for in this overly PC modern world of ours?
Ayria appears to be energized by the chops to her boobs. She clobbers Reb in the face with a Rolling Back Elbow and makes the desperation pin attempt.
Shannan Lerch: Awesomelbow by Ayria! w00t! Girl power!
Slappy Johnson: ONE...
THREeeee-----NOOO!!!! SHOULDER UP!!!
Ayria doesn't even have the energy to protest this time. She lies on the mat exhausted, having expended her second wind. Reb is the first to get up, using the ropes to aid his balance. Ayria finally sits up on the mat and crawls to her knees. Reb appears to be sizing Ayria up.
Reb sees his opening and climbs out to the apron. Ayria gets to her feet and turns to face Reb. Reb flies off the ropes and plants Adams with a Corkscrew shooting star DDT!
Zach Davis: Saturday Night Special! That should do it!
Shannan Lerch: No! It looks like Johnny's going up top one more time! He wants to finish Ayria once and for all!
Johnny flies off the top rope with a Shooting star elbow drop that lands straight across Ayria's throat.
Zach Davis: Oof! Southern Discomfort! Ayria's gonna be eating her McMuffins through a straw for awhile!
Slappy Johnson: ONE...
Shannan Lerch: Johnny Reb defeats Ayria Adams! Great win for the Confederate Big Dick Superstar as Reb and Kira prepare to face Ayria and Sarah for the tag titles at Blast!
Haruna Sakazaki: tonari no BANANA wa ao sugiru..... himitsu ga nai tomodachi wa tsumaranai.... na na na na na......
We can see cheerful Haruna Sakazaki walking while she is singing. It looks like she’s so happy because her brother has a consecutive victory. In the middle of backstage, she meets with “Future” Johnny Reb. that already finished his own match.
Haruna Sakazaki: aah, Reb-sama! Konbanwa (Good Evening)! How….are you?
Johnny draws up short, eyeing the young lady as if she were a snake preparing to strike.
Johnny Reb: Listen, sugar... you oughta just keep your distance from me, an' I'll do the same. Now, if'n you'll excuse me...
Looking supremely uncomfortable with the whole situation, Johnny edges around her and hurries away.
Haruna Sakazaki: Reb-sama! Chottomatte yo (Please wait)! Eeh, nande (what’s wrong)?!
Haruna ask herself why Reb act like that to her. She then rushes to Kira’s room to ask what happened.
Haruna Sakazaki: Aniki, Reb-sama wa tsūro o mitashite, demo, aisatsu wo kotaerunakatta, doushita no?(Brother, I just met Reb in the corridor but he didn’t reply my greeting, why?)
Kira Sakazaki: really? He did that to you again? Hold on, let me confront him. Just wait here!
Then we move again to the backstage when we see Johnny Reb start leaving the building, but he turns around, shaking his head -- and finds himself face to face with a very annoyed Kira Sakazaki. The younger man has his arms crossed, a steely-eyed stare directed at Reb.
Kira Sakazaki: What is your problem, man?
Johnny Reb: Problem?
Kira Sakazaki: Don't play dumb, Johnny. Twice you've disrespected my sister, and I want to know why.
Reb casts a long-suffering look heavenward and sighs.
Johnny Reb: Ok, look, Kira... It ain't nothin' personal. She's a nice girl, an' all, it's just... It's complicated.
Kira's gaze doesn't waver. He raises one skeptical eyebrow.
Kira Sakazaki: You keep dodging the question.
Johnny Reb: I can't tell you. That's the problem. It has to do with you, an' her, an' future events. I can't go changin' it.
Kira Sakazaki: But you're already changing future history just by being here.
Johnny Reb: Some things can be changed; some things are fixed in Time. This one's one of them fixed points. If I told ya about it, an' you tried to change it, the consequences would be... catastrophic. now if you'll excuse me.
Reb releases Kira's hand in his body and slowly walks leaving shocked Kira.
Kira Sakazaki: ......Great Scott!!
“Rocket States” by Deftones hits the speakers as Jay Williams steps out onto the stage donning his signature entrance robes. The crowd erupts with boos.
Kyle Steel: The following three on three tag team match is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, originally from St. Louis, Missouri, he is GEKIDO, Jay WILLLLLLLIAMS!
Williams starts down the ramp as the fans boo, and he completely ignores all the chants as he approaches the ring steps. He pauses for a moment before walking slowly up them, one by one, and out onto the ring apron before stepping between the ropes into the ring. He climbs to the second turnbuckle and looks out at the fans before ripping off his mask, and the fans erupt with another chorus of boos as he drops it to the ground. He steps off the turnbuckle and removes his robe, handing it to the timekeeper.
Zach Davis: And there’s one of the most hated men in the WCF right now, the man who went under his masked GEKIDO persona for several weeks building heat within the locker rooms-
Shannan Lerch: We get it, Zach. Nobody roots for Jay Williams anymore.
The opening strains of "Today I Woke To The Rain Of Blood" by Combichrist filter through the PA system. The standard arena lighting is replaced by a flickering strobe effect that fills the arena as the music picks up with a thumping bass beat. The entrance way is illuminated by a green neon glow and the first one out from the back is King Jimmy Dean! King Jimmy draws a loud cheer from the crowd as he holds his gold and diamond scepter high in the air, ready for action. The cheers grow louder as Chad Evans and Kira Sakazaki appear atop the ramp, taking their place next to Jimmy. The trio of Big Dick Superstars triumphantly raise their arms into the air and then gesture thusly toward their crotches, sending the thousands of females in attendance into a collective squeal of orgasmic bliss that temporarily drowns out the music. Jimmy leads his troops down to the ring and walks up the ring steps to the apron. Jimmy smiles and waves out to the fans, while the Big Dicks hop onto the apron and flip over the top rope in unison. Jimmy climbs through the ropes and each man takes a corner of the ring, climbing onto the turnbuckles and signaling to the fans that it's time for some Big Dick Action!
Kyle Steel: And his partners, they are part of the stable collectively known as the Big Dick Superstars, Kira Sakazaki and Chad EEEEEEVANS!
Shannan Lerch: That Chad Evans really is something, you know? And for an Asian boy, I’m glad to see he broke the stereotype!
Zach Davis: What stereotype?
Shannan Lerch: He’s in the BIG DICK Superstars, Zach, um... Duh?
The lights turn to a blood red as the crowd stands up on their feet, as the electronic beats of "Ghosts 'n Stuff" plays over the P.A. Out the curtains comes Mr. FPV, signature duster and everything. He plays to excited crowd like the circus ringmaster, fistbumping furiously along with the crowd and the music, and each fistbump triggers an explosion of black pyro from the stage.
Kyle Steel: And introducing their opponents, first, from Atlanta, Georgia, he is Frank Patrick Venable, FPV!
Zach Davis: Now, question here, Shannan. Last week after Franky’s match, there was a strange message on the Jumbo-Tron, and it said something like-
Shannan Lerch: Look!
The crowd falls silent as a maniacal laughter echoes over the speakers, and on the jumbo-tron, a message appears.
I SAID IT ONCE, I SHALL SAY IT AGAIN
The words fade from the jumbotron as the maniacal laughter continues. Franky is looking around, confused, and his eyes shoot across the ring at his opponents, and then back up at the jumbotron as the laughter fades.
Zach Davis: What is this all about? Dammit! Franky’s spooked!
Shannan Lerch: I haven’t a clue, but we’ll find out at Blast I guess.
Dr. Feelgood hits the speakers and as the main riff blasts through the arena, Doc, and Mary emerge on the stage, the Confederate Title around his waist. Looking around, he raises a fist in the air, then leads the way to the ring. Climbing up the steps, he holds the Ropes for Mary, who slinks lithely through. Doc steps trough the rooes and grins proudly as he pops the crowd drawing more boos as Mary takes the belt. Mocking them, he sits on the turnbuckle and waits.
Kyle Steel: And his partner, from Griffen, Georgia, he is WCF’s first, longest reigning, and thus far only Confederate Champion, Doc Henry!
Zach Davis: Does that title even count, Shannan? I know we’ve been over this, but he doesn’t even defend the damned thing!
Shannan Lerch: What do you mean? He defended it against Johnny Reb several times at recent pay-per-views!
Zach Davis: I know, but the belt itself is a load of bull!
Shannan Lerch: Don’t let Mary hear you say that.
The lights go out as a spotlight centers on stage. Piano chords begin a haunting melody, accompanied by heavy drum beats. The crowd begins to boo MASSIVELY as the video wall displays the words THE ONLY ONE
Kyle Steel: Making her way to the ring, hailing from Los Angeles, California, and weighing in at 142lbs, she is THE ONLY ONE WHO MATTERS in Professional Wrestling...."The Mistress of Mischief" SARAH TWILIGHT!
Pyros shoot up from the stage as our melody finally kicks into guitar. "The Only One" by Evanescence continues to play as Sarah finally walks out onto the stage. She is greeted with deafening boos and soaks them all in, as if she enjoyed the crowd's hatred. She arrogantly swaggers towards the ring and steps inside. Pyros now shoot off from the ring posts and Sarah stands in the center of the ring, posing, almost as if for her own amusement as the crowd's boos become even LOUDER.
Zach Davis: And there’s one half of the WCF Tag Team Champions, Sarah Twilight, ready for action in this six wrestler tag team matchup!
Shannan Lerch: We’ll see how long that lasts, Zach. She and Aryia Adams, the reigning champions, are going to have to defend their belts against none other than the Big Dick Superstars, Kira Sakazaki and the former world champ, Johnny Reb.
Zach Davis: That being said, Kira is a part of this matchup here tonight along with other Big Dick member Chad Evans, so we’ll see how that works out for the trio that won the tournament.
< DING-DING-DING! >
The teams discuss in their corners the opening action, and it appears Doc and Williams are going to take the first turn for their respective teams as the others step out onto the ring apron. The two tie up, collar and elbow, and Doc uses his size to his advantage, backing Williams without a moment of hesitation into the ropes. The referee starts his count on Doc to back away.
ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!
Doc backs up before the five, and Williams catches Doc with a kick to the midsection, which sends the Confederate into a bent position, holding his stomach in pain. Williams bounces off the ropes and on the return leaps, and catches Doc across the back of the head with a jumping leg drop which lands in sort of a bulldog position. Williams gets up and wastes little time making the tag to Chad Evans.
Shannan Lerch: And it looks like the team of Jay Williams and the Big Dick Superstars are having no trouble getting along to start this matchup! We’ll see how things progress, but right now-WHOA!
As Chad waits for Doc to get up, he shows off to the ladies in the crowd with some pelvic thrusts that draw a few whistles from the crowd, but boos from the males in the audience. As Chad turns around, Doc is up to his feet, and he levels Chad Dogg with a clothesline. Evans springs back to his feet right away, and Doc bounces off the ropes, going for a second and dropping his opponent again. He hits the ropes, and FPV tags himself into the matchup.
Zach Davis: Looks like things are changing up rather quickly, Shannan. Your words might’ve jinxed Evans and crew!
Shannan Lerch: Evans and crew? hm... I like that! Since he is the star of this matchup!
Zach Davis: And your dreams, Shannan, but you’ve got no chance with him!
Shannan Lerch: Shut up, Zachariah.
Chad springs up to his feet as FPV goes springboard into the ring, and Evans ducks a springboard clothesline before hitting FPV a kick to the side of the head as he turned around. Doc clubs Chad in the back with a double axehandle type move, and the ref tells Doc to get to his corner, but he raises his arms up in confusion. The ref points to FPV and Doc shakes his head and goes to his corner as FPV springs up.
Shannan Lerch: Obvious confusion early on for the Team of Treachery, and the blind tag by FPV definitely made Doc Henry a bit aggravated.
Zach Davis: We’ll see if that continues, Shannan. It looks like they’re still not having any trouble.
FPV and Chad stare one another down, circling one another as the crowd chants.
Crowd: LET’S GO CHAD DOGG!
Crowd: LET’S GO CHAD DOGG!
The two lock up, and it seems the two are evenly matched until FPV catches Chad with a knee to the gut. He follows it up with a right and a left, and then a European uppercut. The crowd pops as FPV hits the ropes, and on the return leapfrogs over Chad, who springs to his feet. FPV ricochets off the opposite ropes and Chad knocks him down with a roundhouse kick. The crowd ROARS in approval as Chad points over toward the corner.
Crowd: KIRA! KIRA! KIRA!
Chad tags in the Asian Sensation, and Kira steps through the ropes as FPV gets to his feet, the two nod and FPV charges, but Kira knocks him down with a dropkick.
Zach Davis: Interesting Strategy going on for the Big Dick Superstars so far!
Shannan Lerch: But if they keep this up, it won’t last long!
Kira gets up first, and pulls FPV up, and whips him into the ropes. From behind, Sarah Twilight tags herself into the matchup and FPV notices this, so he holds onto the ropes as Sarah steps into the ring. Seeing this, Kira tags in Chad Evans and backs away as the crowd roars, seeing the matchup they obviously wanted.
Shannan Lerch: Look at Chad! Look at him! Sarah is so lucky getting to lock up with him like that!
Zach Davis: Shut up, Shannan. Just watch this match and see how it happens.
The two lock horns, and Chad takes advantage with a standing side headlock. Sarah pushes him into the ropes and he drops her with a clothesline. He bounces off the ropes and she makes him leapfrog over, and then gets to her feet and goes for a spinning kick, but he ducks it, and as she spins around he hits her with a kick to the side of the head that sends her staggering off to one side. Chad takes her down with a running leg lariat and goes for the pin.
Kickout by Sarah! But Doc had come into the ring to break it up! Jay Williams, However, stops him and sends him out of the ring over the top rope.
Zach Davis: And this match is turning into chaos!
Shannan Lerch: You’re right, but it looks like the BDS are on top right now!
FPV, however, wasn’t going to let that happen, obviously, and he comes into the ring and as Jay turns around, FPV goes for the BOOM! HEADSHOT!
Crowd: BOOM! HEADSHOT!
But no, Williams ducks it, causing FPV to fly over the top rope and outside the ring. Williams and Kira both get back onto the apron, leaving just the two legal competitors, Sarah and Chad, who by this point are both on their feet and are circling one another waiting for one of them to make a move. Chad goes for a Clothesline, Sarah ducks it. Sarah goes to whip Chad into the corner, but he reverses it; Sarah is sent into the BDS/GEKIDO corner instead. Chad runs at her and Springboards, hitting Sarah with an Enziguri!
Zach Davis: Decapitation Style!
As he had done that, Williams had tagged himself back in. As Sarah stumbles out of the corner, Williams hits her with a Tiger Bomb into pin!
Shannan Lerch: Williams Driver Classic!
Zach Davis: I DON'T BELIEVE IT! GEKIDO Jay Williams has just pinned Sarah Twilight!
Williams stands, grinning from ear to ear, and gets his arm raised. FPV and Henry, outside the ring, regroup and head back up the ramp. Evans helps Kira up. Kira whispers something to him and he leaves as we go to commercial.
Shannan Lerch: Looks like we'll hear from Kira once we're back from commercial.
Kira and Haruna are standing together in the ring. Looks like Kira will have something to say.
Kira Sakazaki: Well, I have something to say to my one and only partner for the WCF Tag Team Championship, Johnny Reb. Wherever you are, you have to listen to me. I know you are from the future and I know what is gonna happen to our future or to Chad Evans’ future. And you surely know what is gonna happen to me and Haruna. Since last week, you act strangely to both of us just like something terrible to me is happening in your timeline. I’ll never ask what happened, no, never. I'm just asking two things from you, Reb. Just act like regular Johnny Reb so we can still focus to our upcoming Title Match at Blast against Twilight and Adams or….. please return the actual Johnny Reb to me and do your own business yourself without involving me because…… Motto (again)?
Suddenly the light goes off and the situation goes creepier.
Shannan Lerch: What?! We will see another masked man going to ambush Kira again?
Zach Davis: No, Shannan! I feel something different…. The sense of evil!!
Shannan Lerch: Evil?! What would you consider to be evil?
That's when The WCF Arena's light begin to flicker.
Zach Davis: Did it get cold all of a sudden?
We can hear Oblivion’s voice from out of nowhere.
Oblivion: Good Evening, Kira!!
Kira Sakazaki: W-who are you? Where are you? Show yourself!! I demand of it!!
Oblivion: It doesn;t matter who IT is. I have always lived in your deepest fear in your soul! IT sees you as a brave fearless warrior that always fights everyone who stands in your path. But fear will always be fear. A tough warrior, like you, always hides your biggest fear deep inside your soul. You have a strong fighting spirit. IT comes to uncover your fear! Release you from ALLL-L-L your pain, Kira!
Kira Sakazaki: I don’t know who you are, Kono yaro(you bastard)!! Fight me right now and I will show you the meaning of true fear!!
Oblivion: Such fire in you, Sakazaki! But it’s useless. If you want to fight me, you have to know what fears you the most and IT knows your true fear! Your biggest fear is beside you right now. Yes, you are afraid that you cannot take care your lovely little sister, right? Hahahahaha….. Oblivion sees deep down into your little sister's soul. She has a monster growing, deep down inside her. She WILL be a perfect fit, for her to become Oblivion's apprentice, become a new member of Monsters Inc. We need her!! We need the awakened state of little Torigoya!
Kira Sakazaki: DON’T YOU EVER TOUCH HARUNA!! IF EVEN YOU LAY ONE FINGER ON HER BODY, I SWEAR TO GOD I’M GONNA KILL YOU!!!
Oblivion: Tsk-tsk-tsk!!! Just try it! I even don’t need your permission! I just need your sister! So, starting this night, enjoy your sleepless night and prepare to always look around every time you step out to that ring. Because, someday, we will take your sister from you, awaken her monster deep down inside her soul. Oblivion is going to teach her how to control her dark side. IT will teach her on how to take on every single soul, who stands her God's path. One day. Some day Haruna Sakazaki WILL turn on you!!! She will have no choice!!
Kira Sakazaki: Teme ra kono yaro sonna mon ka? ZAKEN JANEE ZO, OMAE!! KIAI YARO!! (What bullshit are you talking about? DON’T FUCK WITH ME! BRING IT ON!!)
As The WCF Arena still in darkness, we hear Oblivion’s diabolical laughter. We can see Haruna shake with fear. We can hear Haruna scream.
Haruna Sakazaki: KYAAAAAA.......!!!
Then the light goes back to normal.
Kira Sakazaki: nande, imoto (what happened, sister)! What did you feel?
Haruna Sakazaki: watashi no te o hippatte mite kanjiru, ko-kowaidesu, aniki!(I felt someone try to pull my hand. I-I’m scared, Brother!)
Kira Sakazaki: don’t worry, my dear! I always here to protect you! I promise I’ll never let them touch you!
Haruna hugs her brother’s body tightly. We can see Haruna’s body sweating profusely. Kira looks down at Haruna's right hand, which has several scratches. The marks are slowly bleeding.
Haruna Sakazaki: ittai (it hurts)!!
Kira Sakazaki: what is that, oh my god. you're bleeding! damn you, Oblivion!
Kira takes off and rip off his headband and wrap it to Haruna's hand. Haruna is sobbing on her brother's shoulder. Kira goes into her sister's left pocket and pulls out a note that says in blood.... "You will belong to Oblivion." Kira crumples up the small piece of paper and throws it down onto the mat.
Shannan Lerch: Is this the beginning of Kira’s terrible future just like the future Johnny Reb said?
Zach Davis: Poor Haruna. What is Oblivion’s intention to terrorizing that pair of siblings? They're not even Pantheon members!
Shannan Lerch: I think Oblivion wants to recruit Haruna.
Zach Davis: But, Haruna is not a monster. If she was a monster, she probably be the cutest monster in the world!
Shannan Lerch: Come on, Zach! Don’t start!
Shannan Lerch: Here comes the Main Event!
Zach Davis: The Monsters Inc vs The Future Elements! This should be good.
Shannan Lerch: There has been trouble between Kid Phantasm and Nathan von Liebert ever since Liebert kidnapped Nightmare.
Zach Davis: Actually, it started when Kid Phantasm kicked Nathan's rat, Rocky.
Shannan Lerch: Oh, right. I figured a kidnapping was a bigger deal then a rat kicking.
The lights go out. Oblivion by Mastodon begins to play, as the thunderous combination of the guitars, bass, and drums explode through the arena's speakers.
I flew beyond the sun before it was time
Falling from grace cause I've been away too long
Kyle Steel: Weighing in at 305 pounds, from the deepest, darkest part of a sick man's psyche...... O-O-O-OBLI-I-IVI-I-I-I-O-O-O-O-NN-N-NN-N!!!
There are a mixture of cheers and boos, more cheers than boos. The crowd stands onto their feet and rush towards the security railings. Oblivion slowly slinks out to the entrance stage, low to the ground. The Wells Fargo Arena explodes with cheers and some boos. Oblivion has it's arms extended outward, with it's index fingers pointing out. The Vixen are nearly undressed, as they come slithering out and walks next to Oblivion. The Vixen are dressed with bra-like bikini tops, with very short skirts. They have glitter plastered everywhere. Their makeup is smeared, but maintained to be very attractive. The guitar solo begins, lazers flash throughout the arena. Thunder-like sounds rattle the arena, as lighting strike-like sounds shake the foundation of The Wells Fargo Arena. The music continues to thrash as The Vixen are divided in two groups. As, one group are twirling around with the insanity of the music, while the other group, of The Vixen are thrashing with the music. Their energy has the Coliseum going completely crazy!
Oblivion slowly stands up, with it's arms extended outward, spins around. Oblivion, The Vixen, and The Gathering get to ringside. As IT pops IT's neck, Oblivion holds IT's arms outward. The Vixen rub their hands all over Oblivion's well sculpted abdominal muscles. A couple of girls begin to french kiss. The Gathering continues to slink around, tormenting the crowd, nearby. Oblivion proceeds to slide under the ring ropes and is walking over to a corner. The half naked women slide into the ring, in various sexual manners. Oblivion climbs up to the second turnbuckle and is raising IT's arms to an mostly cheering crowd. Oblivion jumps down and walks over to the center of the ring. The Gathering slithers away under the ring, with blood on their hands. Several thousand cameras flash throughout the arena, as Oblivion strikes a muscular pose, with The Vixen rubbing all over Oblivion. All of the women, of The Vixen, begin to kiss. The Gathering peak, from under the ring, as they begin to snarl and bark, while white foam drips out of their mouths.
NOW I'M LOST IN OBLIVION!!!
Zach Davis: Well, Oblivion is scary, I hope Kid and Jeff know what they are doing.
Shannan Lerch: I agree. Wow.
The camera pans to the titantron, where an oak door comes into view. A thump is heard, and the door shakes on its hinges. Several more thumps occur, until the blade of an ax busts through the door. Smoke begins to form on the stage, as a dark figure steps out. Suddenly a woman voice yells out from the speaker.
"No, go away!
Leave me alone!"
Smoke billows down the aisle as the man walks down it to the ring, his identity shrouded in the smog. Meanwhile, on the titantron, the ax makes a large hole in the wood, and a hand reaches in for the door knob, the fingernails painted black. Again the frightened voice rings out as the mystery man slides into the ring.
Zach Davis: That voice sounds familar.
Shannan Lerch: Zach, that voice is Nightmare!
"Don't you come in here!
I don't want you here.!"
The mystery man watches the titantron now, as the door opens, and the same man standing in the ring, steps into the house. A lightning bolt cracks behind him, equal in volume to the string of fireworks that fire up on the ramp. The man on the titantron rubs his thumb on the door, leaving a bloody smear on the polished oak. He lifts the ax with both hands, as the voice pleads.
"No, No, No, NO!!
The scream is cut off as the man swings the ax. Blood appears to splatter across the tron, and then the name "Nathan von Liebert" is written with a finger painted black. Nathan, who is in the ring, falls on his knees, never taking his eyes off the 'tron until it goes black. He then scans the members of the crowd that he could without contorting his torso.
Shannan Lerch: This is terrible.
Zach Davis: I have to agree, but here come The Future Elements, a part of Pantheon.
"Paradigm Shift" by Liquid Tension Experiment blasts over the PA. The lights in the arena go out. Its pure darkness.
Zach Davis: What is going on?
Shannan Lerch: LOOK!
The lights have risen, and Jeff Purse and Kid Phantasm are in the ring. They are behind Nathan and Oblivion, who are watching the titon tron, waiting for the competition. Jeff spins Nathan around, who spins into Kid Phantasm, who hits The Ice Cap on Nathan to start the match. The ref sees this and seperates the teams, Oblivion pulling Nathan to the corner.
Zach Davis: Good offense by The Future Elements.
Shannan Lerch: Getting the jump on the monsters? Thats genius. It looks like Jeff and Oblivion will start things out.
And start they would, as Oblivion charges at Jeff and knocks him to the ground with a should block. Jeff gets right up though, and Oblivion whips Jeff into a corner. Jeff, thinking smart, runs up the corner, hitting a beautiful Taking of The Training Wheels. Jeff goes for a quick cover.
Zach Davis: Oblivion, barely moved by that, throws Jeff off of him.
Shannan Lerch: I think he flew 10 feet in the air.
Jeff quickly tries to keep Oblivion from reaching his feet with little success, it seems all the kicks and punches are doing nothing. Oblivion starts to battle back on Jeff, each hit like thunder, finally finishing with a huge clothesline that lays Jeff out. Oblivion looks back at Nathan, who is up now, and tags him in. Nathan comes out, Phantasm tries to enter, the ref tries to stop him, as Nathan picks Jeff up and kicks him in the crotch. Jeff drops to the ground, Nathan laughs. He picks Jeff up again and whips him into the ropes, coming back with a boot to Jeff's teeth. He begins stomping on Jeffs body, hard. He bends...
Shannan Lerch: And Nathan with that Fish Hook to Jeff. Ouch.
Zach Davis: But he lets go quickly. He is toying with his opponent now.
And sure enough, Nathan picks Jeff up just to kick him back down. Always glancing at Phantasm, who reacts angrily. He slams Jeff with a vertical suplex, and tags in Oblivion. Oblivion picks Jeff up and drops right down with a harsh DDT. He pins.
Phantasm comes in to stop the count. Nathan tries to come in, but Phantasm looks him back into his corner as he exits the ring. Oblivion hits Jeff with another DDT and tags Nathan back in.
Zach Davis: Seeing some great teamwork here by the Monsters Inc.
Shannan Lerch: I just hope they don't ruin Jeffs face.
Nathan comes in and whips Jeff into the ropes, but Jeff hopes over them. On the apron he quickly jumps onto the top rope. Nathan knows what is coming and gets out of the way, so Jeff lands on his feet, met with a round house kick to the teeth. Jeff is on the ground again as Nathan climbs the turnbuckle. He goes for a moonsault, but Jeff rolls out of the way and Nathan catches mat. Jeff is on his feet, he runs up the ropes, Nathan is getting up and...
Shannan Lerch: THE FUTURE!!
Zach Davis: Jeff just hit Nathan with The Future, that 720 DDT. Both men are down.
Each are crawling to their corner, Nathan makes the tag first, and Oblvion grabs Jeff's leg. Jeff gets up on his feet and makes Oblivion release him with an Enzuigiri. Jeff makes the tag. The crowd goes crazy as Phantasm takes Oblivion down with a clothesline, and runs after Nathan. Nathan takes drops down to the mat and begins running around the ring. Jeff Purse backflips off the apron, nailing Nathan as he runs past. Phantasm stands over Nathan, he picks him up by the hair, and sends him flying into the steel steps. Oblivion, however, decides that is enough. He grabs a chair and heads their way, but the ref tries to pull the chair away. And while this is going on, Jeff runs up as Phantasm lifts Nathan, and pull down the Fourth Dimension on Nathan across the steps.
Zach Davis: That was badass.
Shannan Lerch: Chaos is about to ensue, Oblivion just knocked out the ref.
That he did, and he rushed and nailed both Kid and Jeff with a Chair. He goes under the ring, however, and produces a ladder, that he sets up in the ring. He starts up as Jeff follows him up the ladder. In the ring, up on the ladder, Oblivion and Jeff Purse start throwing punches, as Kid and Nathan throw punches near the announce table.
Shannan Lerch: Nathan is coming onto the table, I am gone.
And its true, Phantasm has Nathan on the announce table. Jeff succeeded in knocking Oblivion off the ladder, and Kid is shouting for Jeff. He looks and sees what is happening, and with out thinking, stands atop the ladder, probably 15 ft in the air. The crowd is going wild, and with cameras flashing, Jeff flys off the ladder, 15 ft, and crushes through Nathan on the table with a huge Deflator. Kid smiles, as Nathan lay motion less. He digs the man out and throws him in the ring. Jeff Purse still in the rubble. Kid slides in the ring after Nathan, who thankfully isn't bleeding, and stands over him, a sick look on his face. Kid drops, and pins NvL.
NO! Oblivion dives and breaks up the pin!
Zach Davis: OH MY GOD so close. Wow.
Jeff Purse stirs and stumbles to his feet, sliding into the ring.
Shannan Lerch: How is this match going to end?
The crowd suddenly starts booing like crazy as Bishop, Priest, Doc Henry, and FPV come walking out from the back and down the ramp. Not far behind them are Gravedigger and Logan.
Shannan Lerch: Whoa, what are they doing down here?!
Zach Davis: Looks like the newly formed Darkside of Treachery is coming down to make a statement!
Bishop and Priest pull themselves up onto the apron and step over the top rope together. Kid and Jeff jump on Bishop and start pounding away at him while NvL and Oblivion attack Priest. Doc Henry and FPV quickly slide in and split up and all 8 men are fighting in the ring. Gravedigger and Logan slide into the ring and join their stablemates in beating down Purse, Phantasm, NvL and Oblivion. Logan is seen flying through the air hitting a Connector on Kid Phantasm while Gravedigger drops Oblivion in a Death Driver in the center of the ring. NvL is double chokeslammed by Bishop and Priest and Doc Henry hits a Gambler’s Hand on Jeff Purse, laying out all four men.
Shannan Lerch: WHAT NOW!? What the hell is going on here?!
The bell rings.
Zach Davis: The ref has thrown this one out. What a Slam, geez, our two main events ending with disqualifications...
The crowd pops as Jonny Fly and Bobby Cairo come running out from the back and the crowd boos as Famine of the Vile runs out. All three men ignore each other as they stand at ringside. Hearing the crowd reaction, Gravedigger, Logan and FPV turn to the entry way and are taunting Fly, Cairo and Famine of the Vile to come in and save their stablemates while Bishop, Priest and Doc Henry stomp away at the ones in the ring.
Shannan Lerch: This is madness..
Logan is perched up on the turnbuckles taunting the crowd with a huge smirk on his face. Gravedigger and FPV are both halfway out of the ring, leaning through the ropes, begging Jonny Fly to get in the ring. Both men are doing the belt motion, talking smack to Fly about his days being numbered. Seth Lerch stands at the top of the ramp, an evil grin on his face as he surveys the carnage in the ring. The copyright info comes up as Slam goes off the air.