Scott Savage paces back and forth across his office, his unkempt hair sway with his gate. A rare two week old beard covers his face, and his suit is unbuttoned and askew. He mumbles to himself, but stops when he see sth knob on the door turn. A wide smile spreads across his face as Chelsea Armstrong and John Gable walk into the room.
Scott Savage: Greetings! It is good to see you both.
John Gable: Yeah… what is this about?
Scott Savage: First I would like to apologize for my absence last week. Recent events have taken their toll on me, and I was emotionally unable to come to Slam. Second… I want to announce that I am disbanding S-PAC.
Chelsea and Gable begin to shout their arguments, but he puts up a hand to stop them.
Scott Savage: I started this organization with two goals. The first was to create the most dominant stable WCF has ever seen. We have done that and more. The second was to take a couple of young superstars like yourselves, and bring out the best in them. Turn them into remorseless killing machines, and future world champions. To that end, I have been unbelievably successful.
Scott steps over to Chelsea, and brushes a few strands of hair from her face.
Scott Savage: Chelsea Armstrong… when you came to me you were as talented as any woman I had ever seen, but you didn’t know it. You had been beaten down by selfish friends, and in S-PAC you were lifted up. You found confidence, and became the true embodiment of the MOD nickname. You’re my little murder machine, and I can not wait to sit at home and watch you destroy everyone in your path. Always remember that compassion and mercy are for those who don’t understand how important it is to win. Stay strong, and stay merciless.
He then turns to John Gable.
Scott Savage: John… when you came to me you were already almost perfect. I only had to do a little polishing, and now look at you. The longest raining Television champion in the history of this company. A name spoken in hushed whispers all around the wrestling world, for fear that he may appear and destroy the one who spoke it. John Gable is now known across the world as one of the most frightening foes a man could have, as well as the greatest acting talent the world has ever seen. I certainly can not wait for your next performance. I have a feeling it will be something worth watching.
Scott steps back and takes a second to look at both of his pupils.
Scott Savage: I could have scoured the wrestling world and not found pupils as worthy as the two of you. I am a very lucky man, but now I must leave for a while. I have to be there for Waylon. He is going to need me. I wish you both the best of luck. I know you will not disappoint me.
With that Scott walks out of the room, leaving his former clients in stunned silence.
"Drunk and Crazy" by Mogwai hits as Slam opens up with a shot of Seth Lerch's smug face. The camera pulls back to reveal the owner of WCF standing on the front steps of the Garret Coliseum in Montgomery, Alabama with a dozen of Alabama's finest state troopers in front of him.
Seth Lerch: Gentlemen, I'm going to make this short and sweet.
Seth pulls out a photo of Jayson Price with a red X drawn across his face.
Seth Lerch: This man is not to be allowed in this building. Not even one toe may touch the floor past these doors. If you see him, arrest him. And be ready for anything, and I mean anything, that he may try to pull.
The officers nod their heads in understanding as Lerch crumples up the photo of Price and tosses it to the side.
Officer #1: You gonna pick that up?
Seth Lerch: Well, I mean I-
Officer #2: We might be working for you tonight, but we can still give you a ticket for littering.
Seth hurriedly picks up the crumpled photo and stuffs it back into his pocket.
Seth Lerch: Now then, as I was saying. Be ready for anything, Price has already proven to be crafty. Not very smart, but crafty. And I-
Seth pauses as he sees an all too familiar cameraman strolling toward the front entrance.
Seth Lerch: Just stop right their Bob. I don't know what Price sent you to do but I-
Bob reaches for something and the officers swarm him.
Officer #1: HE'S GOT A GUN! GET THE SPRAY!
Seth ducks behind a bush at the mention of a gun as the officers continue to wrestle Bob to the ground. Suddenly one of them stops and yells out at the others.
Officer #3: It's not a gun!
The commotion stops as the officers back away. Bob sits up, a tape recorder in his hand. Blood is running from his nose and his left eye is already starting to swell.
Cameraman Bob: Last time I do any favors for that jackass!
Seth peeks his head out from behind the bush and comes back out when he sees their is no danger.
Seth Lerch: What the hell are you doing here Bob?
Cameraman Bob: Price sent me here to give you something. A message.
Seth Lerch: A message? What message?
Cameraman Bob: Hear it for yourself.
Bob tosses the tape recorder to Seth and then walks off holding his ribs. Seth looks over the tape recorder before hitting the play button.
Jayson Price: Seth, buddy, look I know you went through all kinds of trouble once again to try and keep me out of the arena tonight and I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for making a guy feel special. Making him feel important. However, I should tell you that tonight you aren't going to succeed. In fact, I can guarantee it.
Seth Lerch: We'll see about that you son of a bitch.
Jayson Price: You could have every employee at your disposal standing at the exits right now, a dozen, or even two dozen, cops standing at the front entrance, but it's not going to do you a damn bit of good. Because I know you too well Seth. I know you're a cheap son of a bitch who would only pay for all that extra security for one day only.
Seth's face begins to redden as he realizes what Price is saying.
Jayson Price: There's no way that the thrifty, cheap, penny pinching Seth Lerch that's been wearing the same outdated band shirts since 1999 would have coughed up the extra money to have anyone watching the entrances in the wee hours of the morning. And you'd be surprised how little you have to pay some night janitor to let you in when the place is empty.
The crowd pops as they realize that Price has outsmarted Lerch and is in the building. Seth heads for the doors, waving for the officers to find him.
Jayson Price: Now right now I'm sure you're ready to send everyone of those fine officers into the building to find me and haul my ass off to jail. But let's not waste their time, Seth, or anyone's time for that matter. You want to find me? Come look for me in the center of the ring in about an hour. Alone. And don't you worry about anything happening to you, because we both know if I was planning on attacking you I'd have already done it. And if you don't show up, we're just going to keep on doing this little dance where I force you to fork out cash for more security. So what's it going to be Seth?
The tape cuts as the officers wait for Seth to make the next call.
Seth Lerch: Go home.
Officer #1: What? But you-
Seth Lerch: I said go home. I'm going to end this tonight.
Seth heads inside as the officers leave. The cameras cut inside of the arena to the announce table as the crowd is left buzzing.
Zach Davis: Did we hear that right? Jayson Price is in the building and wants to see Seth Lerch alone in the ring?
Freddy Whoa: Well there's no way that can end badly.
Zach Davis: Sarcasm?
Freddy Whoa: Oh no, not at all.
Zach Davis: Oh, okay. Well what kind of plan can Seth Lerch have?
Freddy Whoa: Well he's a businessman with a sharp mind that's successfully run this company for well over a decade and has never been bested by anyone, so I'm guessing he's more than capable of handling a situation like this one.
Zach Davis: Wait a second. He's none of those things at all. Freddy, I'm starting to think you're messing with me.
Freddy Whoa: No I'm not.
Zach Davis: Oh, all right then.
The arena lights go black. The titon tron lights up with a very, very bright light, the sound of angels are heard singing...Then the image of Father Terry Andrews, the holy puppet, appears, with a white background.
Father Terry Andrews: Disciples of the WCF, I bring you peace and love. Tonight is the night I have promised all of you that salvation will appear. You needn't wait much longer my friends, for soon you all will be saved. Speak now disciples of the WCF if you wish to be saved, or forever be damned in eternal damination.
There are mixed reactions, very few of them are cheers of salvation.
Father Terry Andrews: Well then, don't say I didn't warn you. Salvation is coming my children, The Rapture is soon upon us.
The screen cuts quickly to black.
Breakdown by Biohazard plays and biohazard comes out and walks to the ring as yellow and purple lights flash.
Freddy Whoa: And it looks like we're going to start our first match of the night, and Zach my boy I'm not sure what to expect.
Zach Davis: This match can only boost Biohazard or drop Logan even further than the opener. The once great champ is starting the shows now, and this match might just leave him lower on the roster than that.
Freddy Whoa: What's lower than opening the show?
Zach Davis: Um... Wednesday Night?
Freddy Whoa: WHOA! Not cool, man! Not cool!
The slow march of a drum roll hits the speakers carrying into "Treachery" by Bleach. Logan slowly steps out onto the entrance ramp to a chorus of boos. He stands at the top of the ramp, slowing looking around at the masses of garbage booing him. He's wearing his signature attire, with a black leather sleeveless vest over it. Logan begins walking down the ramp, taking his time, every now and then pointing out to a member of the audience and talking trash to them. Logan hits ringside, climbing the ring steps, and getting inside the ring stepping through the middle rope. Logan climbs the nearest turnbuckle, gazes around at all the stupid WCF fans booing at him, and he raises his arm up into the air. After a moment, Logan finally steps down, taking off his vest and throwing it to the outside, and then paces the ring while the music fades.
Kyle Steel: The Following match is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Mexico City, weighing in at two hundred ten pounds he is "Everyone's Favorite Luchadore", BIOHAZARD!!
The crowd pops for the Luchadore.
Kyle Steel: And his opponent, hailing from Chesapeake, Virginia, he is "The Face of Treachery", weighing in at two hundred and fifty pounds, ladies and gentlemen he is LOGAN!!
Master of Puppets by Metallica hits, and Seth walks out. He walks to the ring, slapping a few hands, and rolls in, staring down The Face Of Treachery.
Kyle Steel: Ladies and Gentlemen, the special guest referee for this contest is the Owner and Chief Executive Officer of the Wrestling Championship Federation, Mr. Seth Lerch!
Zach Davis: As if there's a Mrs. Seth Lerch anywhere?
Seth Lerch: I heard that, Davis. I'm docking your pay.
Zach Davis: Shit...
Kyle exits the ring and Seth checks both competitors for concealed weapons, and calls for the bell.
< DING-DING-DING! >
Biohazard immediately goes right at Logan, but The Face of Treachery uses Biohazard's momentum to whip him into the ropes, on the rebound Logan catches him with a lariat.
Freddy Whoa: Nice shot from Logan to start the match.
Logan pulls BH up wastes little time in executing a quick belly-to-belly suplex, before pinning the Luchadore.
Seth Lerch: No, Kickout!
Logan gets to his feet and grabs Biohazard, but the Luchadore catches Logan with a right, and a left, and then a quick step-up hurricanrana, and as Logan gets back to his feet Biohazard drops him with a DDT.
Zach Davis: Nice combo by Biohazard.
Biohazard goes to the top rope and leaps, looking for the frog splash, and-
Logan grabs at his ribs in pain as Biohazard rolls off after connecting, and the Luchadore quickly pulls Logan up, setting him up for the Trip ToThe Wasteland, but before Logan can be picked up the bigger man uses his size and strength to flip Biohazard, sending him crashing to the mat behind him on his back.
Freddy Whoa: But Wait!
Biohazard grabbed Logan's legs on the way down, not only helping slow his own fall, but pulling Logan backwards as well and rolling him into a pin, almost sunset flip-like in style.
Seth Lerch: NO! Logan kicked out!
Biohazard shoves Logan away and gets up, breathing heavily as he motions toward Logan, calling for him to get up. The crowd starts an almost rhythmic clapping tying to draw The Face of Treachery to his feet, and possibly to his end.
Zach Davis: Good idea, Logan. He can't send you to the wasteland if you stay down!
Freddy Whoa: But he can-
Biohazard approaches and locks Logan in the Toxic Shock, his dangerous Crossface move.
Zach Davis / Freddy Whoa: Do that...
Logan flails about in pain as Biohazard locks the hold tighter, but Logan manages to get his foot to connect with the bottom rope, and Seth notices.
Seth Lerch: One... Two... Come on, Biohazard, get off. Three...
Biohazard lets go of the hold and drags Logan by the focused arm toward the center of the ring, but Logan surprises BH with a fist to the gut, and gets to his feet, quickly setting Biohazard up for the Connector.
Freddy Whoa: WAIT! SMALL PACKAGE!
Zach Davis: No, it is a Jumbo Hotdog of - oh! The wrestling move!
BIOHAZARD HAS LOGAN IN A SMALL PACKAGE!
Freddy Whoa: WWHHOOAA!~!!~!!~!~!~
The crowd... doesn't pop. They're in stunned disbelief.
Zach Davis: BIOHAZARD... HAS DEFEATED... LOGAN!?
Freddy Whoa: Has he ever won a match before in his life? Is he going to unmask to be Skyler Striker or something? Please by Skyler Striker.
Purple and green confetti and ballons begin falling from the sky. The screens at the top of the arena that usually show replays begin flashing the name "BIOHAZARD," ordering the fans to chant for him. They decline. Biohazard grabs a mic.
Biohazard: i beat logan. suck on it jonny fly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Biohazard drops the mic as Logan lays there.... and the lights go out. The crowd goes ape shit.
Zach Davis: What the hell is going on now?!
Freddy Whoa: I DUNNO BRO.
The lights flicker on and off like a strobe light and a man is in the middle of the ring. First, he Clotheslines the fuck out of Biohazard, turning him inside out. Logan is up, and BAM, Logan turns around and the man with a hooded sweatshirt clotheslines Logan down too. The crowd pops, not for cheers, just for the fact that it's chaos.
Zach Davis: WHO THE HELL IS THAT?!
The lights stop flickering and are completely black. The lights come back on and the man is standing over Logan whose face down still moving but barely. The man unzips his sweatshirt and looks up.
Freddy Whoa: WHOOOOAAAA
Zach Davis: WHAT?!!? TORTURE AND LOGAN IN THE SAME RING TOGETHER! WHAT THE HELL IS TORTURE DOING NOW?!!?
Freddy Whoa: I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD EVER SEE THIS IN A BILLION YEARS.
The crowd goes apeshit fucking bananas fucking crazy and Torture takes the sweatshirt completely off and throws it into the crowd. He turns around and a steel chair and a microphone is laying in the corner. Torture grabs the steel chair and sets it up as if he's going to sit down.
Zach Davis: What is he going to do?! Logan and Torture going to fight right here right now?!
Torture begins yelling at Logan to get up. Demanding him to get up. Torture kicks at Logans hands as he's trying to use them to desperately, and slowly, claw and crawl his way to the nearest ropes. The crowd is actually getting behind Logan just for the sheer fact to see these two legendary icons go at it one more time.
Freddy Whoa: THIS CROWD IS CRAZY, ZACH.
FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! Chant is thunderous in the arena. Torture nods his head to the chant and still demanding Logan to get up. Logan fights his way to the bottom rope, and pulls himself to the second rope. Logan's face is fucking furious. Logan has never been so angry in his life. Logan stands on his feet and the crowd is going apeshit crazy again. The cameras are shaking, everyone on their feet, Logan turns around and goes for a wild punch but Torture ducks it, catches Logan and hits a stiff T-Bone suplex. The crowd boo's.
Zach Davis: TORTURE WITH THIS T-BONE SUPLEX! SECOND WEEK IN A ROW WE'VE SEEN HIM USE THAT NOW! LOGAN IS OUT COLD!!
Freddy Whoa: EITHER WAY YOU SPIT IT OUT BRO I STILL DONT BELIEVE WE ARE SEEING TORTURE AND LOGAN IN A WCF RING RIGHT NOW!
Logan's hand moves slowly forward to crawl one more time. He lifts his head as Torture looks on slightly taken back. The crowd comes alive for Logan one more time but the dreams are dashed as Torture stomps the back of Logan's head face first into the mat. Torture walks to the chair, moves it right next to Logan's lifeless body and sits down. He grabs the microphone.
Torture: I told you so.
The crowd boo's Torture out of the arena. Just kidding, he's still there.
Torture: I told you in 2004 that Logan was second-rate compared to me.
Torture: I told you in 2006 that he wasn't even on the same level as me.
Torture: I told you a few years ago that he didn't deserve the seconds I would be paid to waste in a ring dominating and destroying him just like I would Johnny Fly.
Torture: I told you last year if he wanted to fight me in a match then he should put his name on the list of the participants for this year's WAR. What has he done since? Nothing. He hasn't done anything since, and yet people still like him and want him here? Why? WCF doesn't need you, hell, Logan, WCF doesn't want you! You hear me you over-hyped, over-glorified-mid-carder, huh? Hello?
The Tort is kicking at his lifeless body as he continues to call him names.
Torture: So here we are. Sunday Night Slam and what do we have? Logan laid out, and Torture standing tall once again. Like every time we've ever been compared, like every time we've ever stood in the ring together at the same exact time, and just like right now, Torture stands over Logan. And this is who you want to be in your company?
The crowd boos. Torture puts the microphone back to his mouth.
Torture: Next Sunday at WAR, I will defeat anyone and everyone in WCF at WAR just like I've always done my entire career, and ... You know what, you don't deserve me..
Torture drops the microphone and kicks the chair over. Torture picks up the steel chair and folds it and lays it down in the middle of the ring. Torture bends down and picks up Logan's body and holds him up. Torture holds Logan who is barely standing on his feet in front of him and shows him to the crowd in a walk-around 360 degrees.
Zach Davis: What the hell is Torture doing?
Freddy Whoa: This is crazy, Zach, this is crazy!
Zach Davis: I'm not a fan of this at all!
Torture takes his thumb and crosses it through Logan's throat and then bends him back into his arms and hits a Torture's Device on the steel chair. Torture pops back to his feet as WCF refs and staff members run down the ramp. Torture slides out of the ring and jumps the guardrail into the crowd. Most of the crowd is booing, some are cheering, some are just going apeshit crazy still because of the chaos Torture is bringing.
Zach Davis: THIS IS ENOUGH DAMN IT! HE HAS TO BE STOPPED! TORTURE FOR WEEKS HAS BEEN ATTACKING AT RANDOM, OR AT LEAST WHAT WE THINK, THIS IS.. UGH.
Freddy Whoa: It's CRAZY Zach! WE JUST SAW TORTURE AND LOGAN IN THE RING.. GOD DAMN THIS IS CRAZY BRO! LIKE WHOAAAA!!!
Zach Davis: For the past three two weeks Chelsea Armstrong has been apparently putting the whole locker room on notice as a series of three attacks have happened.
Freddy Whoa: That’s right Zach, in two weeks Chelsea and her evidently growing support group consisting of Chase Michaels, Jay Omega, and Alex Richards have taken out Pantheon members Jonny Fly and Corey Black as well as a returning Logan. It’s been made clear through various Twitter posts consisting of the hashtag #3Down that this isn’t done yet.
Zach Davis: I believe you’re right Freddy, and it appears we might be witnessing yet another clever attack as we speak, backstage employees have sent word that Chelsea has been spotted.
The camera flashes backstage where a match ready Chelsea Armstrong is seen walking down the hallway smiling innocently for the camera that has approached her. Passing through various stage hands and a few wrestlers everyone appears to be a littleweary of where she’ll stop, she doesn’t yet though as she continues walking before turning the corner. Coming to an abrupt stop Johnny Reb is seen at the end of the hall talking to Jay Omega, Chelsea brings her index finger to her lips signalling for it to remain quiet before she continues her walk up to Johnny.
Chelsea Armstrong: Hey there timelord.
Johnny Reb: Really Chelsea?
Chelsea Armstrong: Really, really. You know…I’ve always wanted to time travel myself, but then again I’m quite tired of the past. I’m one to look toward the future.
Johnny Reb: Oh?
Chelsea Armstrong: Yeah, but there’s one problem…I simply don’t see you in my future and that’s a bit of a problem for me.
Johnny Reb: So is this where you jump me from behind like a coward like you have the other three?
Chelsea Armstrong: No no no, you should know by now that I tend to leave the dirty work to other people, kind of like him.
Turning Johnny is met with Jay Omega who’s facial expressions have changed, a once smiling Chelsea is quickly turned into one of confusion as the time goes without a hit being thrown.
Chelsea Armstrong: What are you doing!
Jay Omega: I told you I didn't want to do this, Chelsea.
Letting out a frustrated puff of air Chelsea pushes Omega out of the way as she connects with a strike of her own to the head of Johnny Reb. And the two start to brawl with Reb managing to get the advantage as he throws Chelsea into and ultimately through a piece of the set. Reb looks at Omega who is just standing there. Chelsea manages to get back to her feet which causes Reb to turn around only to get taken out with a spear by Chase Michaels.
Freddy Whoa: What a spear by Chase Michaels, he just speared Reb out of his time travelling boots!
Zach Davis: I'm guessing that was a fixed point in time...
Chelsea looks back at Omega with an annoyed look on her face.
Chelsea Armstrong: At least someone is doing their damn job!
Meanwhile Richards picks Reb up for a powerbomb and as Richard drives Reb down Chase jumps up and grabs Reb by the back of head with his knee positioned against the back of Reb's neck and with the momentum of the powerbomb Michaels knee is driven into the back of Reb's neck.
Chelsea Armstrong: Okay two people are doing their damn jobs!
All of a sudden Cormack MacNeill appears on scene with a bunch of security and MacNeill instantly squares up with Richards as Michaels, Chelsea and eventually Omega start to brawl with security.
Cormack MacNeill: You looking for a fight Laddie?
Richards simply looks at MacNeill and nods his head.
Cormack MacNeill: Good cause so am I!
Zach Davis: Finally someone is standing up to that Pack of thugs!
Freddy Whoa: I wouldn't count your Scotch Eggs before they're hatched, the odds are still four to one against WCF's fighting Scotsman!
MacNeill give Richards a mighty shove, sending the big man stumbling back. With an eye on Omega Cormack helps Johnny to his feet and steadies him.
Cormack MacNeill: You ok Laddie?
Johnny Reb: Yeah, thanks for the save. You were always my fav....
MacNeill scoops up Reb and drives him to the floor with a rotating spinebuster.
Zach Davis: Stone of Kings! Oh my god has Cormack MacNeill joined Chelsea's little pack of miscreants?
Michaels, Chelsea and Omega wipe the floor the rest of the security personnel and even Chase's valet Aeryn gets involved as she nails one of the security guard with a running bicycle kick.
Zach Davis: This is just crazy, Chelsea Armstrong and her group misfits have now attacked a grand total of four superstars.
Freddy Whoa: Sadly I still don't think they're done, and with the addition of MacNeill who knows who'll be next.
As they finish taking out the security guards they finally let up before stepping back as if assessing the damage. Chelsea looks at each man taking a long glance at Omega before once again looking into the camera.
Chelsea Armstrong: Four down.
Walking away they all follow except Omega who kneels down beside Reb who is just starting to slowly move back to his knees.
Jay Omega: Look, I'm real sorry about all this, Johnny. I tried to stop them, I really did. But you were on the list, and I can only do so much; at least you'll still make it to the ladder match tonight. I hope you understand this is just business, and don't let it affect anything outside of work. But if it does... well, we'll always have the Cretaceous Period.
Reb gives him an uncertain look as he's still dazed from the attack while Jay stands and follows in the direction the others went. Just as in the past few weeks medics rush onto the scene a few minutes too late as they tend to the fallen veteran.
Scene opens backstage. Tyler Walker is heading to the ring. When he turns a corner, he hears a voice.
Voice: Hey, kid.
"The Mack" Steve Orbit steps out of the shadows.
Tyler Walker: What do you want freak
Steve Orbit: Whoa, take it easy. I ain't here to fight.
Tyler Walker: Yeah well I know you have a problem with jonny Fly. And my enemies friend... I mean a friend who hates my enemy... uh..
Tyler starts to count on his fingers.
Steve Orbit: It's cool, I understand. Look, I'm just here to warn you. Jonny Fly ain't the best guy to be hangin' around.
Tyler Walker: ya he is
Steve Orbit: He don't have friends. He uses people. And when they aren't useful to him anymore... he turns on them. You know what I'm sayin'?
Tyler's expression is blank.
Steve Orbit: Just be careful, aight? You never know when he's gonna turn on you.
Tyler Walker: Watch youre back jerk
Tyler walks away. Orbit shrugs.
Zach Davis: Fans, we've got Ultimate Destroyer vs Tyler Walker up next after this commercial break, stay tuned!
Kyle Steel: This match is scheduled for one fall!
Ultimate Destroyer is wheeled down in a steel box (like they did the tasmanian devil in looney tunes).
Kyle Steel: Introducing first, from Parts Unknown... weighing four hundred pounds... ULTIMATE DESTROYER!
Freddy Whoa: That is a big, scary dude.
Zach Davis: No doubt.
"I Like to Move It" by Reel 2 Reel plays over the sound system. Tyler Walker emerges from the back with white pyros at the entrance. He's wearing his black and gold letterman jacket with "TW" embroidered in the front, "TY WALKER" on the back. He's also wearing black shades, a white tank top and his black shorts with "TW" written around the belt line. Black boots and has his wrists taped. He slowly makes his way to the ring with a cocky smile on his face, bobbing his head to his music as he ignores the fans. When he hits the ring, he climbs on the apron, drops his jacket to ringside, and does a few body builder poses, as more white pyros blast off. He enters the ring through the ropes and removes his tank top and shades, throwing them to ringside before getting ready to fight.
Kyle Steel: And his opponent, from Santa Monica, California... weighing in at two hundred and seventy-five pounds... TYLER WALKER THE SPACE WAREWOLF!
Freddy Whoa: No Jonny Fly tonight?
Zach Davis: He's got a match to prepare for.
Freddy Whoa: Yeah, plus Walker and Fly are probably trying to shake those homosexual rumors.
Zach Davis: ... Nobody believes those rumors. They aren't even rumors. It's just something that Ultimate Destroyer said in his promo.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! Why you getting so defensive? Are you involved, Zach? Is it a love triangle? A triangle of dic--
DING DING DING
Zach Davis: Stop it.
Freddy Whoa: Saved by the bell, Zach.
Destroyer and Walker collide in the center of the ring! The ring shakes from the two massive men bouncing into each other. Neither man budges. They take a few steps back, before colliding again! And again, neither man budges.
Zach Davis: Destroyer is WAY bigger than Tyler-- and Tyler is huge!
Freddy Whoa: I'll tell you what you got here. It's the unstoppable force, versus the immovable object. Ain't that how it go?
Destroyer and Walker start throwing right hands at each other. Destroyer gets the upper hand and jacks Tyler with a big forearm to the face. He grabs Tyler and throws him into the corner, hitting him with big chops to the chest. He whips Walker to the opposite corner and then charges with a running splash.
Zach Davis: Well, Ultimate Destroyer is living up to his name right now!
Ultimate Destroyer scoops Tyler and hits a Tombstone piledriver before covering him.
Freddy Whoa: Walker kicks out!
Destroyer stomps out Walker as he tries to get up. Walker throws a couple blows at Destroyer's gut but Destroyer knees him in the head. Destroyer pulls Walker up and presses him over his head-- but Walker slips out behind him! Destroyer turns around and Walker nails him with a right hand! Destroyer no-sells it. Walker backs up and charges with a shoulder block, but Destroyer just tosses him aside.
Zach Davis: Tyler Walker is nowhere near his comfort zone. He's used to plowing over his opponents-- he can't do that with Ultimate Destroyer.
Destroyer grabs Walker but slips out and lifts Destroyer onto his shoulders in a fireman's carry!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa!
Walker drops Destroyer in a gutbuster!
Zach Davis: The Crunch! Tyler Walker is the strongest man alive!
Walker covers Destroyer, hooking the leg.
Freddy Whoa: KICKOUT! Ultimate Destroyer kicks out!
Walker goes into a three-point stance. As Destroyer gets up... Walker drops him with a running clothesline.
Zach Davis: I guess he DID learn something from watching football with Fly.
Freddy Whoa: Hey, if there's anybody I want as a teacher or a mentor, it's Jonny Fly. The dude is brilliant.
Walker grabs Destroyer and puts him in a standing headscissors. He tries to lift Destroyer... but he can't. He tries again... but Destroyer counters with a back body drop! Destroyer whips Walker into the corner, and charges with a big boot. He climbs to the top turnbuckle, bringing Walker with him.
Freddy Whoa: Not looking good-- WHOA!
Destroyer flies off with a powerbomb to the ringside floor!
Zach Davis: THE END!
Freddy Whoa: I mean, he gotta pin him first--
Zach Davis: That's the name of the move! The End!
Destroyer rolls Walker into the ring and pins him.
DING DING DING
Air raid sirens sound over the PA.
Freddy Whoa: And now it's the end. Ultimate Destroyer beats Tyler Walker!
Zach Davis: Walker just didn't know what to do when faced with someone bigger and stronger. It's like my dad always said... there's always somebody tougher than you.
Freddy Whoa: Your dad said that?
Zach Davis: ... Maybe it was the bartender, I dunno. It's true, though.
Destroyer celebrates his victory in the ring as Walker heads to the back.
The scene opens up to the “Livewire” Grayson Pierce walking backstage with his new sparkly, sheer white robe over his arm. He walks with purpose as he enters a small room seeing Jay Omega reclining, instructing a wiry young man on the proper way to polish his United States Championship Belt.
Jay Omega: Counter clockwise motions… dammit, Virgil I said COUNTER CLOCKWISE!
His assistant obliges.
Livewire: What’s up champ?
Jay Omega: Oh hey, Sparky. How's the quest for gold going?
Livewire: Not bad, not bad. I believe you owe me 5 grand.
Jay Omega: I owe you what now? I'll remind you that you let the fleabag into Seth's private loo when I specifically asked you not to. Now there's gonna be a fight for the recipe, when I could have been making millions a day off it as we speak. The way I see it, you should be the one who owes me. And a lot more than just "cinq mille" as the French say.
Livewire: I believe your exact words were 'Do your best to keep that psychotic sycophant rabid animal out of our business meeting and you'll be 5 grand richer.' Well I tried my best, you know how persistent that idiot can be. Now cough it up, bro. My losing streak has been eating away at my saving's.
Jay turns his head, part frustrated, part curious, and part impressed.
Jay Omega: Well, maybe you should stop losing, ever think of that? Yes, yes, you've found the illustrious loophole. That's what I get for smoking the good shit before I shook your hand on that one... well played good sir, well played. VIRGIL! Check in the couch cushions... there should be some pocket change somewhere in there.
Virgil slowly walks over to the couch and reaches in. He finds nothing.
Jay Omega: Come on, think of it like prom night with an Italian girl; really get your arm in there... Buddha, it's so hard to find good help nowadays.
Virgil continues searching and eventually pulls out a stack of bills.
Jay Omega: There we go! Gimme them greenbacks.
Jay rifles through the wad of cash and pulls several bills out. He hands the rest to Livewire who puts it in his pocket.
Jay Omega: And now we're squared up. Don't spend it all in one place, Sparky.
Jay Omega: Producer?
Livewire: Don’t act like you don’t know about the letter… and this robe.
Jay Omega: That is indeed a bright robe, but I really don’t know what you’re talking about.
Livewire: So you’re trying to tell me that you’re not this ‘Producer’ guy?
Jay Omega: Producer? I’ve been called a lot of things in my day; The Omega Man, the Hardcore Maniac, Snicklefritz Q. Shaalom, the Sultan of Smoke, King Khaos, Salacious B. Crumb, Grand Poobah, Ruler of the Ring, Top Dog, Head Hancho, Big Dawg, simply The Man…
The scene cuts to commercial and when it returns Omega is still going…
Jay Omega: The Maharaja of Mayhem, the Chief of Chiba, Pot Potentate, Emperor Scorpion, the Canadian Superman… but never Producer. I like the way it rings, though. Maybe I should add it to my already extensive list. Thanks for stopping by, kid, I appreciate the helpful suggestion.
Jay Omega: NOW CLOCKWISE YOU FOOL! Have you never seen the Karate Kid? Wax on, wax off, motherfucker! Krishna, a fucking monkey could do this… actually, maybe I should get a monkey to do this... yes... A MACAQUE!
Grayson turns to leave. Before he can reach the door Omega stops him.
Jay Omega: Oh hey, one more thing, Gray Poupon.
Livewire: What the fuck do you want now, Omega?
Jay Omega: You're gonna like this! I think... Virgil, you neutered gerbil, why are you polishing that belt! Go fetch Mr. Music Man's... you can copyright that nickname free of charge, by the way... package.
Virgil slowly trods off-screen.
Livewire: You're always full of games, aren't ya, Jay? You ever gonna grow up?
Jay Omega: Heh heh, poor naïve, gullible, ignorant, childlike, unsophisticated, wide-eyed greenhorn. You're in waaay over your pay grade. Just sit back, do as you're told, and enjoy the ride. This guy knows what he's doing.
Virgil returns handing Jay a small, palm-sized box wrapped in heavy-brown paper. Hanging from it is note. The Omega Man tosses it to Pierce; the note flying off in the process. Livewire looks at package wrapped in the familiar paper, the note upon the grand near his foot, and whips his head around furiously.
Livewire: .... You piece of crap, you said you didn’t know anything about this guy.
Jay acts like he's not listening.
Jay Omega: Virgil, you slacker! Why can I not eat off that belt? Am I going to have to replace you with a CAPUCHIN!
Omega glances at Grayson and offers a half-perplexed, half-amused expression. Pierce takes a deep, steadying breath, reaches for the fallen envelop and pulls out the note. It contains two words: "Do it." Grayson pauses to eyes Omega curiously; Jay is curious himself, trying to nonchalantly read the note with a smirk before meeting Livewire's gaze.
Jay Omega: You gonna open the box, or what? The suspense is killing me, and you can't tell me your interest isn't piqued, too.
With a reluctant sigh, Grayson tears the wrapping and opens the box. Gray’s eyes open wide with wonder, shock and terror, as if seeing the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, yet is scared to death of it. He pulls out a simple golden ring with an enormous solitairy, round-cut diamond. Omega whistles in appreciation.
Jay Omega: Hey, at least you finally got some gold.
Gray stares blankly at Omega and seemingly on cue Eve Overton makes into the room and over to the duo.
Eve Overton: Hey, Gray. We’ve got some administrative stuff to take care of before the ladder match, you done playing with your friends?
She pushes her silken blonde hair behind her ears and repositions her secretary glasses back on the brim of her nose. She looks up at Gray and smiles before turning around and walking away. Gray takes the ring back in the box, and puts the box in his waist band, smiles and follows suit. He pauses momentarily to chuck the white robe at Jay.
Livewire: Here. You can have this gaudy ass thing back.
Livewire walks out of shot as Jay examines the robe , then rubs it on his face.
Omega : This is soooo soft. It really is a fabulous material.
T-Rex’s “20th Century Boy” cues up on the arena’s sound system.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! That’s Bryan Worthy’s music!
It is indeed, so it makes sense for Bryan “Buzz” Worthy to be the one walking out from the Gorilla position. He’s dressed casually; just jeans and an official WCF “War 2014” tee shirt. The newly refurbished Television Championship is slung over his shoulder. Buzz jogs down the ramp, slapping hands with the fans who line the barricade. After climbing the steps and entering the ring he is given a microphone by Kyle Steel.
Buzz Worthy: Everyone having a good time tonight?
The fans cheer; indicating that they are in fact, enjoying themselves. It’s Sunday night in Alabama; what else would they have going on if not for Slam?
Buzz Worthy: I came out here for two reasons. First, I wanted to show the WCF Galaxy the work done to the WCF Television Title.
He holds the belt over his head to the approving crowd.
Zach Davis: That’s right: when Buzz became champ he had the title fixed so it was once again the Television Title and not the Cinema. Restored it to its old glory.
Buzz sets the strap back down on his shoulder.
Buzz Worthy: And second, I want to talk about John Gable.
Lots of boos for King Leukemia. Bryan nods understandingly.
Buzz Worthy: Yeah, I get that. John's not the easiest person to like. He’s conceited. He’s anti-social. But the fact is, he also happens to be one of the best wrestlers on the planet.
The fans continue to boo, although the level of rancor has decreased a bit. Worthy begins to pace back and forth in the ring.
Buzz Worthy: No doubt about it, John Gable is a main event level talent. Facing him at War, whether the TV Title is on the line or not, is going to be an uphill struggle. But still, nothing in life worth doing is ever easy, right?
There are loud cheers in response to Worthy’s rhetorical question. He grins and continues.
Buzz Worthy: That’s why last week I thought, ‘Hey, let’s have some fun with this match. During the wait for War let’s do something that both entertains the fans and also stokes our competitive fires.’ So I went on Twitter and suggested an acting competition; John Gable versus Bryan Worthy, in this very ring, to see who’s got the chops. Only John said no. He doesn’t think the WCF Universe would appreciate his talents.
Zach Davis: He’s right; they probably wouldn’t.
Worthy stops and scratches his head.
Buzz Worthy: I needed to come up with a way to convince John Gable he was wrong; that the fans of the Wrestling Championship Federation do know a good performance when they see it. But John’s a tough nut to crack. I barely understand how pro-wrestlers think, despite being one myself. A wrestler slash actor is that much more of a mystery.
Buzz Worthy: So I called for help.
Another dramatic pause as Buzz looks up to the stage.
Freddy Whoa: Help? What’s Bryan Worthy talking about? Who-
The opening chords to “Exiles” by Therapy? interrupt Freddy, and cause the fans in attendance to collectively gasp in shock. Their surprise transitions to a massive pop when a tall, lean man with long black hair walks out onto the stage.
Zach Davis: Oh my God! It’s Phillip Baines! Phillip Baines is here!
Baines, resplendent in a monochromatic white suit, acknowledges the crowd’s thunderous reaction. The former Hardcore Champ turned movie star walks down the ramp as his usual pyro goes off behind him. He hops up onto the apron and flips over the top rope. As Buzz applauds politely the Baines goes and climbs each of the four ring posts and salutes the fans.
Freddy Whoa: It’s been a long time since we’ve seen The Young Lion in a WCF ring!
After jumping down from the turnbuckle closest to the timekeeper’s table, Phillip reaches out and down to accept a microphone. He then begins speaking.
Phillip Baines: Hello, Montgomery, Alabama!
There’s another pop for the hometown getting mentioned. Once it quiets down Baines continues.
Phillip Baines: Thank you for that amazing welcome. Really, to be away all this time, and to still get those positive vibes, it means a lot. I may make my living in Hollywood now, but there is no doubt that, to me, the Wrestling Championship Federation will always be home.
More cheers. An “Enter War!” chant slowly begins to build. Baines, looking genuinely moved, finally shakes his head in the negative.
Phillip Baines: It’s tempting; y’all, it’s very tempting. The lure of lacing up my boots again is strong. But unfortunately, I got certain contractual obligations. Billion dollar film franchises are relying on me being available. You think Oblivion is scary? You don’t want to give one of those heavyweight studio lawyers a valid reason to come after you.
There are loud boos when the l-word is mentioned. Baines lets the crowd vent before moving on.
Phillip Baines: Let’s talk about why I am here. Last week my people got a call from the WCF Television Champion, “Buzz” Worthy-
He points to Bryan, who gets a modest pop.
Phillip Baines: - asking for my help in selling something. Now, normally, I don’t do commercials, but when it was explained that what was being sold was a wrestling angle, I made an exception. See, what Buzz is trying to do is set up an acting competition between himself and my fellow thespian John Gable before their rematch at War.
Baines gives a dramatic shrug.
Phillip Baines: How could I say no to that? As both a practitioner and a patron of the arts, it’s my duty to encourage the performance of live theater no matter the venue. And I knew, with the personalities and the possible stakes involved, you’d want to see it, right?
The fans cheer. Phillip nods encouragingly.
Phillip Baines: Of course you do! This “Act Off” is a chance for you to be entertained by two of WCF’s most charismatic competitors before they go and beat the hell out of one another at War. A quick tease before the grand finale. But here’s the rub: John Gable isn’t interested in performing for you. He doesn’t think you’ll get his act. I don’t believe that’s true. You guys are smart. You know talent when you see it. After all, it’s because of fans like you I’m in the position I’m in today.
Zach Davis: And that position? Making $20 million a picture.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa!
Phillip Baines: It’s because of fans like you that John Gable and Buzz Worthy and every other in the wrestler in the back gets to make a good living performing here, in this very ring.
Baines pats one of the ropes for emphasis.
Phillip Baines: John Gable is wrong when he says you aren’t sophisticated enough to appreciate his genius. He’s just making excuses. Blaming the audience when maybe he should be looking at himself. Why is this man claiming he’s too highbrow for WCF? Dude used to dress as a turkey when he wrestled.
Freddy Whoa: That’s true. We all remember John Gobble.
Phillip Baines: And then there was the ethnic shtick he would do while pretending to be Herbert Goldsmith. That role wasn’t exactly what I’d call ‘subtle’.
Zach Davis: It fooled the WCF Universe though.
Phillip Baines: My point is, John Gable is putting on airs. He’s not too sophisticated an actor to come out here and perform for you tonight. And you need to let him know it. Tell John Gable that you’re a discerning audience, and that you want him and Buzz Worthy to get to monologuing right now!
The fans, having been whipped into a frenzy by Baines, begin to whoop and holler. A chant in favor of the “Act Off” reverberates throughout The Garret Colosieum.
Crowd: Mon-o-log-uing! clap clap clapclapclap
Crowd: Mon-o-log-uing! clap clap clapclapclap
Crowd: Mon-o-log-uing! clap clap clapclapclap
Crowd: Mon-o-log-uing! clap clap clapclapclap
This goes on for several seconds, with Baines and Worthy encouraging the chants. Then:
"Ozark Empire" by Listener booms over the P.A. system as a less than pleased Gable walks down to the ring with a microphone already in hand. He quickly rolls into the ring as fans boo
John Gable: Brilliant! This is one desperate display you have going Buzz! You are so desperate to steal everything from me! First you take my title and returned it back to its pathetic original state, completely destroying EVERYTHING I did for it. If you were a smart man you would have taken a ride on the momentum of the CINEMA TITLE!
The fans boos grew louder.
John Gable: And now you want to try and make a fool out of me in this ring! What makes you think that you can beat me in my craft?!
Gable turns to Philip...
John Gable: And you! You kind of people are the reason I am stuck here! I was so sure that if they were ready to hire an asshole like you that it would only be a matter of time before they would come for me! I should be the on in the block busters, getting paid millions for a profession I was BORN to do! Fine! You all want this act-off, then lets do it. Each of us do a monologue. I assume Buzz already has his in mind and lucky for him I already have plenty of monologues memorized but for this specific event, I will do one of my favorites. Even though I tend to think Shakespeare tends to be overrated and Romeo and Juliet to me is either a poor melodrama or too comedic for most to accept...Act 3 Scene 1...Mercutio's death!
John takes a moment to compose himself as the arena lights darken as a spotlight shoots down. He suddenly takes a step back, gripping at his chest
John Gable: I am hurt. A plague o' both your houses! I am sped. Is he gone, and hath nothing?
he pauses for where a response would have been. He slowly makes his way to the ropes to support himself.
John Gable: Ay, ay, a scratch, a scratch; marry, 'tis enough. Where is my page? Go, villain, fetch a surgeon.
Gable points out in a general direction to emphasize the order given as he cringes and shuts his eyes in pain before slightly stumbling over and clasping onto Buzz's shoulder to represent Mercutio's friend Romeo.
John Gable: No, 'tis not so deep as a well, nor so wide as a church door; but 'tis enough,'twill serve. Ask for me tomorrow, and you shall find me a grave man.
Gable chuckles sardonically as he slumps away from Buzz before suddenly turning around with a stern stare.
John Gable: I am peppered, I warrant, for this world. A plague o' both your houses! 'Zounds, a dog, a rat, a mouse, a cat, to scratch a man to death! a braggart, a rogue, a villain, that fights by the book of arithmetic! Why the devil came you between us? I was hurt under your arm.
Gable's voice slowly turns to a hostile gravelly tone on the last line before turning away and walking by the ropes with a weakened tone...
John Gable: Help me into some house, Benvolio, Or I shall faint. A plague o' both your houses! They have made worms' meat of me: I have it, and soundly too. Your houses!
Gable slumps over the turnbuckle for a moment as the spotlight died. After a moment of silence the lights came back on and Gable smiled slyly as he feels confident in his performance.
John Gable: If it was up to me Mercutio would have lived and got Juliet and Romeo would have died sooner. But anyways...I think it is your turn Mister Worthy...
Buzz nods. Tucking the microphone under his armpit, the current TV champ strikes a meditative pose: arms outstretched, fingers curled and pointing upward. After finding his center he lifts the mic back up to his face and addresses the audience solemnly.
Buzz Worthy: I... am Groot.
Both Phillip Baines and John Gable give Worthy bemused stares. Eventually, Baines's look of confusion morphs into a smirk, while Gable's becomes one of building rage.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa.
The fans let loose a huge cheer. At least half are giving Buzz a standing ovation. A chant of "Encore!" starts up. Buzz begins bowing to all sides of the arena.
Zach Davis: It seems the people have spoken, Freddy. Bryan Worthy is the clear choice of those in attendance tonight.
Ring announcer Kyle Steel enters through the ropes carrying a large bouquet of roses. He hands them off to Buzz, who accepts them magnanimously. Phillip gives some appreciative applause to the performance, and when the sounds coming from the seats die down he takes up his microphone.
Phillip Baines: Well, that was certainly... entertaining. Both of you did an excellent job, but, as in all things in life, there can only be one winner. And tonight that distinction goes to Bryan Worthy!
The crowd pops again. Phillip and Buzz shake hands. Meanwhile, John Gable, who has been seething the last half a minute, breaks his silence.
John Gable: No! I refuse to accept that! That is exactly what is wrong with the world! It is biased against me! And they will always gravitate towards simplicity because they don't want to rack their poor little brains with any actual thoughts. You!
Gable points to Buzz.
John Gable: You don't do them any favors catering to them!
Buzz Worthy: Give it a rest, John. The reason people don't like you isn't because you're too smart for them; it's because you always have been an arrogant jerk. And if you can't see that, then maybe it's time to question how 'brilliant' your act really is.
Gable takes a step towards Buzz. Worthy drops his mic and lowers the TV Title off his shoulder. Gable throws his microphone aside and now the two go nose to nose. They're both talking, but no one can hear what's being said except Phillip Baines, who's enough of a pro to know when to step back from the spotlight. Finally, Gable shoves Worthy! He quickly recovers, and launches himself at the smaller man! He takes him down to the mat and the two start brawling! The fans cheer them on as they roll around the ring. Gable gets the upper hand, and begins hammering Buzz with closed fists. Worthy is able to kick him off, and the two get to their feet just as several members of WCF Security enter the ring. They swarm over the combatants and pull them apart, while Baines picks up the title belt to keep it out of everyone's way.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! That escalated quickly!
Zach Davis: Yeah, into the one thing every fan appreciates: mindless violence!
Freddy Whoa: Bryan Worthy and John Gable might have resolved who's the more favored WCF personality tonight, but to find out which one is the better wrestler, we're going to have to wait for War!
The segment ends with both men being kept separate by the WCF personnel, with Baines speaking to both trying to calm them down.
Zach Davis: Welcome back to Sunday Night Slam! I’m Zach Davis alongside my broadcast partner, Freddy WHOA!
“TNT” by AC/DC begins to play as Shawn Scholes walks out from behind the curtain, looking around rather menacingly. He walks down the ramp and to the ring. Fuck explanations.
Kyle Steel: On his way to the ring…SHAWN SCHOLES!!!
“To Be The Best” by Tenacious D begins to blare throughout the arena as "The Crazy One" Kaz Mazy leaps out from behind the curtain and begins dancing on the stage to his entrance music, Sophia trailing a few paces behind him.
To be the best, you gotta pass the test
You gotta make it all the way
TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN!!!
YOU'RE THE BEST IN THE WORLD!!!
Kyle Steel: On his way to the ring…from Fort Worth, Texas…”THE CRAZY ONE” KAZ MAAAAAZY!!!
Freddy Whoa: Definitely the crowd favorite so far…
This continues for several seconds before Kaz runs down the ramp and slides into the ring to a large pop from the crowd. He continues to dance in the ring to an even louder pop from the crowd. He flourishes against the rope before awaiting his opponent.
“Adrenaline” by Shinedown hits the speakers as Tobias Barnz walks out from behind the curtain. Tobias walks to the platform and raises both his hands as purple and green versions of Jericho's pyro set off. He then runs down the ramp to the steel steps, walks up and stands on top of the corner, raising his hands again.
Kyle Steel: On his way to the ring…TOBIAS BARNZ!!!!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA! Look at this guy!
Zach Davis: He’s tall as fuck with virtually no muscle at all. Astounding. How much do you think he weighs?
Freddy Whoa: Probably a buck twenty soaking wet.
All three men stand in the ring now as the referee calls for the bell. Tobias immediately tries to take out Kaz with a Superman Punch…but Kaz ducks and Tobias takes out Scholes instead, knocking him clean out of the ring!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA! I think Barnz just murdered Shawn Scholes!
Zach Davis: He definitely won’t be any part of this match from here on out.
Tobias whips around on Mazy, who springboards off the middle rope and takes Tobias down with a swinging DDT, plowing them both into the mat. Kaz rolls to his feet to a large pop from the crowd and Sophia clapping wildly from the apron.
Zach Davis: What a strong start from this young gun!
Tobias shakes off the DDT and sits up, but Kaz dances around a little bit before running off the ropes and hits Tobias with a massive Hanging Dong and Barnz head bounces off the mat!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA!
Zach Davis: Kaz Mazy is making short work of Tobias Barnz.
Kaz climbs to the top rope, puts his hands to his mouth and yells:
Kaz Mazy: WHY! WON’T! CAN’T! LET! ME?!
Kaz leaps off the top turnbuckle, and like he shot out of a cannon hit’s a corkscrew shooting star press and lands directly on Tobias’ abdomen, knocking him back down to the mat. Kaz hooks his leg and the referee goes for the count.
DING DING DING!
The referee calls for the bell and the match is over. Kaz leaps off of Tobias and begins celebrating to “To Be The Best” by Tenacious D. Sophia climbs into the ring with Kaz’s help and she and the referee lift his hand up in the center of the ring. The scene fades to black with Kaz and Sophia still celebrating Kaz’s easy victory.
Jonny Fly is seen walking backstage through the halls. Some people stop and try to talk to him, but he really isn't hearing any of it. They aren't anybody anyway, just people who work for the company who want a little piece of the Jonny Fly aura. He gets to the room he is looking for, the famed Pantheon locker room. There is a note attached to the door. Jonny grabs it and reads it out loud.
Jonny Fly: Jonathon Fly, I warned you of The Rapture that was coming for you and all the sinners in the WCF. Out of everyone, Jonathon Fly is the biggest sinner this entity, WCF, has ever seen. A man who pimps, kills, swears, does drugs, eats chicken wings in the middle of a match. A man who steals, cheats, begs, has no mercy for his fellow man. Jonathon Fly, you are the worst kind of human being there is. I will no longer stand for your evil, evil ways. You have took a whole group of men, Corey Black, Jeff Purse, Jayson Price, Steven Orbit, Polar Phantasm, Johnny Reb, Skyler Striker, and now a young man named Daniel Booker, you have took these men and turned them into degenerates. I cannot sit for it any longer. I will not let you sully the good name of the WCF any further. So Jonathon Fly, I am afraid you have left me no further options than this. Respectfully, Father Terry Andrews.
Jonny Fly smirks and crumbles the letter, throwing it on the ground. He opens the door, blackness. He flicks the light on, and is surprised to see the locker room has been decorated to look like a chapel. There are crucifixes hanging around, there even is an alter. A picture of Jonny Fly with devil horns sits on the middle of the alter. He rolls his eyes. On the wall behind the alter, the word SACRIFICE is written in black spray paint, with an arrow pointing toward the bathroom. Jonny looks in, his eyes and mouth going wide. There lies Corey Black in the middle of the bathroom. He isn't bloody, he is just unconcious. Jonny runs over to him.
Jonny Fly: Corey. COREY! What the fuck?
Corey begins to come to.
Corey Black: Shit, man, what the fuck?
Jonny Fly: Thats what I said, what the fuck? What happened?
Corey Black: I don't know dude. I fucking came in here, it was dark. I turned to flick on the light, and the next thing I know you and I are...uh...in the bathroom together.
An audio is suddenly heard throughout the room.
Father Terry Andrews: Jonathon Fly and Cornelius Black, the time for salvation is upon us. How did you feel, Jonathon, thinking that your friend had truely been sacrificed? I would have to say the look in your eyes really spoke wonders for what you were feeling. This was just a warning for what is to come. Pantheon is a collection of all the Gods of a people, and this falsity that you believe yourselfs to be has gone on for far too long. The Rapture is coming sooner than you expect, especially for you two, Cornelius and Jonathon.
The audio cuts out as Jonny and Corey get to their feet.
Jonny Fly: Dude, what the fuck is wrong with that puppet?
Corey Black: Why the fuck did he keep calling me Cornelius?
Jonny gives him a shrug. Cut away.
"Master Of Puppets" hits the speakers and out comes Seth Lerch.
Zach Davis: And here comes the boss!
Freddy Whoa: We've had ourselves one heck of a show tonight and it's only going to get better!
Zach Davis: Indeed! Now let's finally find out what Jayson Price has to say to Seth Lerch.
Seth marches to the ring, a stern look on his face as he ignores the mixed reaction from the crowd. Seth slides into the ring and grabs the microphone from Kyle Steel before telling him to leave the ring.
Seth Lerch: Jayson Price, you wanted me in the ring tonight, well here I am. Let's get this over with so I can kick you out of my arena and we can get this show going once again.
Seth lowers the microphone as he stares up at the stage. "Final Countdown" by Europe hits to a big pop from the crowd as the arena lights drop.
Zach Davis: Oh man, this should be good.
The crowd does their usual sing-a-long to the lyrics as Seth rolls his eyes. As the music continues, the stage remains empty.
Seth Lerch: Cut the music! Cut the damn music!
The song cuts and the lights come back on as Seth begins to laugh.
Seth Lerch: What is this? Some kind of mind game you're trying to play with me Price? Oh ha ha, you got me good. Sent a fake recording to get me in the ring and then don't show up. Wow, aren't you just a clever guy.
The crowd boos.
Seth Lerch: So damn clever, giving me exactly what I wanted by not being in my arena. Good for you Price, you really got me.
Seth continues to laugh as the crowd's boos grow.
Seth Lerch: Oh shut up.
The boos grow even louder.
Seth Lerch: Boo me all you want, but he's the one that had you thinking he'd be here tonight. And you want to know what? It's good that he didn't show up. Because I would have ended this little "situation" with these right here.
Seth holds up his fists to the camera.
Seth Lerch: That's right, I would have put him out with his fifth concussion. Or maybe his tenth, who knows how many that injury prone, obnoxious piece of sh-
Seth is cut off as the lights to the arena again drop. "Explosia" by Gojira hits the speakers as pyro goes off from the stage. The crowd loses their minds to the heaviness of the metal being pumped into their ears. Seth looks around a bit worried as a spotlight hits the stage.
Zach Davis: Is this more mind games? Is he really in the building?
Seth continues to watch the stage as no one comes out. Suddenly, up in the rafters, we see movement. Seth is oblivious as a rope is dropped to the ring and Jayson Price begins to rappel down.
Zach Davis: And he is here!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa!
Price ends up in the center of the ring behind Lerch as he's still oblivious. Finally the lights come back on and jumbotron fires up with a live feed of the inside of the ring. Seth sees Price standing behind him and quickly spins around. Price reaches for something, causing Seth to panic and back into the ropes. Price laughs as he pulls a microphone from his back pocket.
Jayson Price: A bit jumpy tonight?
Seth Lerch: Don't you dare try anything Price. I swear to god, I'll fire you if you put even one finger on me.
Price cocks back his fist, forcing Lerch to flinch. The crowd laughs as Lerch stands back upright.
Seth Lerch: Ha ha, real funny. You know what else is funny? Watching your ass get hauled off to jail.
Seth lets out a laugh as the crowd boos.
Seth Lerch: In fact, it was so funny, what do you say we see it again?
Seth points to the stage as the Alabama state troopers from earlier march out from the back.
Jayson Price: Hold on, hold on. I knew you were going to go this route, like I said on that tape, I know you all too well. So I'm going to give you one chance to tell those cops to stop, turn around and head back on out of here.
Seth Lerch: Oh? And why would I do that?
Jayson Price: Because I'm going to bet you wouldn't want some of the conversations you had with my doctors being leaked to the press.
Seth Lerch: I...now you hold on just one second.
The cops continue to head down the ramp as Seth turns and holds up his hand.
Seth Lerch: Everyone just hold on. I don't know what conversations you're talking about, but I-
Jayson Price: Tried to pay off the company doctors to keep me from being cleared anytime soon?
Seth Lerch: That's a lie!
Jayson Price: Really? Well why don't we go to the tape?
Price reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tape recorder. He starts to go for the play button when Seth reaches for it.
Seth Lerch: Wait! Fine! You guys get out of here. Now!
The cops turn and head back up the ramp as Price tucks the tape recorder back away.
Seth Lerch: Okay, fine, you win. I'm here, there's no cops, what do you want?
Jayson Price: Simple. To give you this.
Price reaches back and pulls out an envelope he had tucked into the waistband of his jeans. He hands it over to Lerch.
Seth Lerch: What the hell is this?
Jayson Price: Open it up and have a look.
Seth raises an eyebrow as he opens the envelope and pulls out a paper. As heads over it, his eyes quickly grow wide. His microphone drops to the ring with a thud.
Jayson Price: Come on Seth, read it aloud.
Price holds out his microphone for Seth to use.
Seth Lerch: You...you...
Jayson Price: Okay we're obviously going to get nowhere with you stammering like that. What that document Seth Lerch is currently holding says that I, Jayson Price, am hereby cleared to once again resume any and all wrestling activities...
The crowd begins cheering as Seth begins to sweat.
Jayson Price: ...beginning in exactly one week.
Seth shakes his head no as he drops the paper and envelope to the ground.
Jayson Price: Which means, Seth Lerch, that I will officially be entering the WAR Match.
A "Jayson Fucking Price" chant breaks out in the crowd as Seth vehemently shakes his head no. He scoops up his microphone from the mat.
Seth Lerch: NO! NO! ALL OF YOU SHUT UP NOW!
The crowd quickly changes to boos directed at Lerch.
Seth Lerch: No, you are not going to be in the WAR Match. I don't care what some piece of paper says, you aren't appearing at WAR.
Jayson Price: I've got a contract Lerch. And your lawyers and my lawyers know each other pretty well already, so if you want to go down that route again, I-
Seth Lerch: SHUT UP!
Price is a bit taken aback at the anger in Lerch's voice.
Seth Lerch: No, we're not going that route Price. I'm not risking you getting in through some litigation bullshit. I'm going with Plan B.
Seth sneers as he waves to the backstage area. Out from the back come The Slickness, STG, Cryboy McEmo and Hardcore McMurderkill. Seth slides out of the ring as they all climb up onto the apron. They climb into the ring and Price shrugs his shoulders before tackling McMurderkill to the mat. The others dive on top of Price and begin throwing punches as Seth waves to the back again.
Zach Davis: What is this? Why is Seth Lerch sicking the Jobber Squad on Jayson Price?
Freddy Whoa: You know you really shouldn't call them that. That's not nice.
Zach Davis: What? That's the name of the team coming out.
Out from the back comes The Jobber Squad, Macho Atlas, Fusion Critter, King Kong Buttermilk, Phat Frost and Shiek Rock, along with Hugh Jazz and Doctor Science. They all enter the ring and join in on the beat down of Price as Seth cheers them on from the ringside. McEmo and STG pull Price up to his feet as Seth climbs up onto the apron. He starts to enter the ring when Price comes to life and pulls STG and McEmo together, smashing their faces into each other. Price now throwing punches at anything that moves as bodies begin hitting the mat. McMurderkill spins Price around and throws a punch. Price blocks it and hits him with a Downfall. A Downfall for Hugh Jazz as well. Doctor Science gets a Pricebuster for his troubles as the rest run for the hills. Seth is still on the apron, fear in his eyes. Price takes a step toward him and Seth leaps from the apron before backpedaling up the ramp.
Freddy Whoa: And Seth Lerch is hightailing it away from the ring!
Zach Davis: Smart move. Price seemed quite eager to put the boss down.
Cryboy McEmo starts to stir on the mat and Price pulls him up to his feet. Price now staring down Lerch as he lifts McEmo up before spiking him headfirst to the mat with a Pricebuster. Seth angrily grabs a mic.
Seth Lerch: NOW! NOW!
DOZENS of cops rush the ring.
Freddy Whoa: Again?
They tackle Price down and even Price can't fight off that many police officers. They manage to get him handcuffed.
Zach Davis: Handcuffed or not, Jayson Price is officially in WAR. I'm calling it right now, we're looking at this years dark horse. Well, unless Seth never unhandcuffs him.
Freddy Whoa: 5 years ago a rookie named Jay Price made his name known in WCF by making it to the final 3 of WAR, eliminating a record 5 men in the process. Can he finally win WAR and add to his legacy?
Price struggles as the officers are about to take him away. Suddenly, Seth's face changes and he appears to have a change of heart.
Seth Lerch: You know what, officers? Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I shouldn't have Price arrested here tonight. Stand down.
The officers look at Seth questioningly but one pulls a key out of his pocket, ready to undo the handcuffs.
Seth Lerch: No, no. That won't be neccessary. You can leave.
The crowd buzzes.
Zach Davis: Uh oh. What does Seth have planned?
Obediently, the cops exit the ring, leaving Jayson Price handcuffed inside of it. Price struggles to his feet, looking pissed off as all hell. Seth raises the microphone to speak once more.
Seth Lerch: You know, if it wasn’t great enough seeing you handcuffed in the ring, it’s this next announcement I’m about to make with you still in the ring that really gets me smiling. War is always full of surprises. Surprise entrants and all that. This guy was going to be a surprise entrant himself, but I decided why not get people talking now? Jay, pay close attention, because you know this man real well. You may be medically cleared to wrestle NOW....
A couple of seconds later and “Hit Em Up” by Lil Wayne hits the speakers.
Seth Lerch: But let's wait until the end of this segment, shall we?
Freddy Whoa: WHOA!
Zach Davis: Is Seth serious?!
The crowd boos instantly recognizing the music. A few seconds pass and out from the back walks a big muscular man wearing a black mask. He is also wearing a biker jacket with the word Mara on it plus other MS-13 markings. Jay Price’s face is a mixture of confusion and annoyance.
Zach Davis: Hector Rodriguez?!?
Freddy Whoa: What is this? We all know the man under the mask is Gravedigger. Gravedigger was Hector Rodriguez all those years ago.
Seth is grinning and he turns to Hector and nods. Hector nods back. Seth lifts the microphone again.
Seth Lerch: Ok ok, the joke’s up. We all know that I wouldn’t be able to convince Gravedigger to ever return as Hector Rodriguez. That whole thing was just a ploy. Let’s take off the mask.
Hector leans his head forward and reaches back, untying the mask and pulls it off. It’s Gravedigger, of course, but a slightly different looking one.
Freddy Whoa: Gravedigger is looking a bit different here. Close cropped hair, a more typical looking goatee and he’s definitely in better shape! I’m impressed!
The crowd is not as impressed as they go back to booing loudly. Gravedigger smirks. He grins at Price in the ring and sarcastically waves at him. Price is pretty pissed off, but is having a bit of trouble showing it with the handcuffs and all. Seth is chuckling and finally hands the mic over to Gravedigger who lifts it up.
Gravedigger: It is good to be back.
Loud boos once again as the fans show their long standing hatred of one of the most evil and sadistic men to ever step foot in a WCF ring. Gravedigger lets it go on for a good 20-30 seconds before lifting the mic again. He looks dead at Jay Price.
Gravedigger: It’s not good to see you, you scum sucking leech. How you been, Price?
Price stands at the side of the ring yelling obscenities at Gravedigger.
Gravedigger: Bro, I can’t hear you. Can you speak a little louder? Why don’t you pick up that mic in the ring. Oh wait, you’re handcuffed. You know, that’s a metaphor of your career, Price, always handicapped whenever you’re in the ring. Mentally, physically. How about you just lay on the mat and use the mic that way? Let’s just go ahead and get a good shot on live television of you laying on the mat on your back, because that’s what’s going to happen next week at War!
The crowd boos and Jay is still cursing out Gravedigger while telling him to come to the ring.
Gravedigger: That’s right, Price. I’m returning to the ring next week at War. The difference in me showing up for War last year or the year before or any of my recent times in the event is that this time there’s something a bit different about me. I’ve rid myself of the distractions of the last few years. I’ve been training out of the public eye for months for this return. I’m walking into that ring next week at War and unless you become the luckiest man alive and have already been eliminated from War by the time I walk out, I’m PERSONALLY going to eliminate you. Not only will I eliminate you, I’m going to take back that record of most eliminations at War and I’m ALSO going to win the damn thing once again and beat whatever scum-sucking leech is holding that World title when it’s my turn. This is a new Gravedigger. This isn’t the Gravedigger of 2011, 2012 or even last year. This isn’t even the Gravedigger of 2003 or 2010 when I was at my greatest. No, this is the Gravedigger of 2014, the one who is going to outdo everything I’ve done before and it starts right now as a matter of fact.
Gravedigger walks down the ramp towards the ring, dropping the mic on his way down. The crowd starts going crazy as Price takes a couple of steps back due to the handcuffs and is crazy enough to challenge Gravedigger anyway. Gravedigger walks over to the side of the ring and looks up towards Price in the middle of it, a smirk on his face. Gravedigger reaches up and grabs the middle rope, pulling himself up onto the apron. Gravedigger starts to climb into the ring, but stops and stands back up. He looks at Jay and smiles, shaking his head no.
The crowd boos loudly and Jay gives Gravedigger a curious look. Gravedigger grins a sadistic grin and glances over his shoulder back at the top of the ramp where Seth is standing. Seth stands to the side gesturing towards the ramp and out from the back walks MS-13 members Adrian and three other unnamed individuals. Big bruiser looking guys all as big as Adrian. Jay Price is livid and the crowd is going nuts.
Freddy Whoa: Oh come on! This isn’t fair!
Gravedigger is chuckling on the apron. The MS-13 members surround the ring. They each climb up onto the apron and then everyone, Gravedigger included, climb into the ring. Jay goes straight after Gravedigger and before the other men can join in, the lights go out.
Zach Davis: What happened?!
The lights come back on and the crowd pops loudly as the rest of Pantheon are all standing in the ring.
Freddy Whoa: The tables have turned!
Gravedigger immediately realizes what’s going on and quickly bails out of the ring, leaving the other MS-13 members to fight it out with the members of Pantheon. Pantheon gains the upper hand after a few seconds and they clear the ring. Adrian and the other men stumble over to Gravedigger who is a bit pissed off at the failed attack on Price, but he still manages to smirk as he slowly walks up the ramp, still facing the ring. The members of Pantheon are at the side of the ring, telling Gravedigger to get back in the ring. He shakes his head no and laughs as he reaches the top of the ramp. Gravedigger stops and turns to Seth, shaking his hand. Seth holds Gravedigger’s arm up in the air and points to him as the show goes to commercial.
Kyle Steel is standing in the middle of the ring, as he begins the next match.
Kyle Steel: This bout is a tag team match, and it is for the World Championship Federation Television Title. Introducing first, being accompanied to the ring by his manager James Church....fighting out of Halifax, Nova Scotia...weighing in at 275 lbs...Cormack MacNeill!!!
The drone of the pipes fills the air as MacNeill and Church slowly walk out onto the entrance ramp. Both men stop, and look around at the raucous crowd who are cheering and booing them in equal numbers. A sneer is etched into Church's face as he surveys the screaming masses and MacNeill's is set in a hard grin.
Zach Davis: This is the second opportunity in as many weeks that Cormack McNeill has challenged for either an opportunity for gold or for gold itself. This time, he challenges for the Television Title.
Freddy Whoa: He keeps scratching at the door, and eventually it will fall.
As the drums kick in, both men walk slowly down to the ringside, with Church stopping at the end of the ramp to adjust his suit jacket, with MacNeill stopping and waiting, eyes SCANNING the crowd.
Church climbs up the steps to the ring, and with a flourish holds open the top and second ropes for his charge, who slides between them and heads for the nearest corner.
Church steps down and moves behind MacNeill's corner as the bearded brawler stretches on the ring ropes and waits for the remaining competitors in the match.
Kyle Steel: And his partner...
A ghostly synth breathes over the PA.
The first keyboard chord of Prince's 'Gold' blares as a red shooting star firework darts up from the entrance-way to the left rafters. The second chord chimes as the arena lights flash red. The third chord accompanies a light blue star shoots to the upper right of the arena. Blue lights flash to greet the fourth chord.
As the main tune commences, a yellow spotlight covers the entrance as 'The Shine' Brent Alpine steps out from the back to sneers. A shower of sparks surround him, eliciting a brief pop at the spectacle. Alpine keeps walking, slides into the ring and jumps onto the turnbuckle.
Kyle Steel: From Rockhampton, Australia, weighing 259 pounds... 'The Shine'... Brent... Alpine!
'The Shine' glares in comical intensity and lifts up the back of his suit jacket like a Batman cape. He dismounts and hangs his jacket on the turnbuckle. He leaps onto the opposite turnbuckle. He removes his tie and long white shirt and throws them into the crowd, now ready for the match ahead.
Zach Davis: After a sabbatical, "The Shine" returned to the ring, and he made mincemeat out of Logan last week.
Freddy Whoa: No doubt. If there is anybody in this match who has a shot at taking that title from Buzz tonight, this is the guy to do it.
"Born in the USA" by Bruce Springsteen begins to play, as Deuce walks out to the ring, dressed basically in his street clothes, with the flag of the United States draped over his shoulders. He has a camera in one hand, and a microphone in his other hand. He talks into the microphone, as he continues to pan around with the camera. When he gets into the ring, he climbs the steps and launches himself over the top rope into the ring, as he raises the flag over his shoulders and spins around in the middle of the ring. Both Cormack and Brent depart the ring, as Murdock continues to spin around in the middle of the ring with the American Flag raised overhead.
Zach Davis: Here's a wild card if I ever seen one.
Freddy Whoa: Why is he in the match? Hasn't he lost two matches in a row?
Zach Davis: To VERY stiff competition. Let's not forget that al-Reb was trained by a former World Champion, and Kaz has been on a tear.
Freddy Whoa: Well, he certainly is wild, but I don't know about his chances in this match.
"20th Century Boy" by T-Rex plays. Buzz bounds out on stage and encourages the fans to cheer louder. He jogs down towards the ring. Once he reaches the apron, he turns back, drops to one knee and points at the fans on both sides of the ramp, nodding his head to the music. Then he rolls under the ropes and does the Kurt Angle arms outstretched spinning taunt before heading to his corner.
Zach Davis: And here comes the Television Champion! The fans really love his energy!
Freddy Whoa: Yes they do, but how long will he hold on to the strap? Is he going to make it to War with the title intact?
Zach Davis: We'll see momentarily. It looks as if the competitors are trying to decide who's going into the match first.
Freddy Whoa: And it looks like Cormack and Brent are having a disagreement over who's going into the match. Brent wants in, bad!
Zach Davis: These two look like they're going to fight!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA!
Murdock goes across the ring, and smashes into both opponents! Brent gets knocked out of the ring, but Cormack remains. Murdock goes for an Irish Whip on Cormack, but he reverses it, sending Murdock into his own corner. Cormack charges, but finds an empty corner with a boot sticking out of it, courtesy of Buzz...
Freddy Whoa: And a face full of sole!
Zach Davis: That's gotta hurt.
Murdock tags out to Buzz, who gets into the ring and hammers away at Cormack with multiple elbow drops before pulling him to his feet to execute a Northern Lights Suplex for the first pin attempt for the evening...
Zach Davis: It's going to take much more than that to put down Cormack!
Freddy Whoa: And you saw how the guys on the ring apron reacted. Murdock looked like he was going to leap over the ropes for a second there!
The camera pans to Murdock, who is standing on the bottom rope, while Alpine in his corner looks furious about the gaff earlier in the match. The camera goes back to the action, where Cormack is starting to fight back, scoring a powerslam on Buzz, but unable to capitalize on making a quick tag. Buzz manages to get to Murdock, who is quick to cut off the ring from Cormack, as he drags Cormack back to his corner, before exclamating it with a kneebreaker slam to the ground.
Zach Davis: And now Murdock is going to have his way with him.
Freddy Whoa: He loves his submission moves, and he's really going to town on that left leg of his.
Murdock continues the assault on the leg, with stomps and knee smashes, before rolling him over into a half-crab. Cormack's grunts can be heard through the entire arena. Murdock further taunts Alpine, who attempts to enter the ring. The referee stops this, giving Murdock enough time to grab a rope for leverage. Cormack's grunts turn to screams as he does this, while Buzz starts shouting at Murdock.
Zach Davis: Well, its obvious that Buzz does NOT approve of those tactics.
Freddy Whoa: But it is effective, if outright dirty.
The referee turns around, but Murdock has already released the rope. He holds on to the foot, as he maneuvers for his other free leg, placing the legs in a Cloverleaf configuration, locking in a Texas Cloverleaf while he stands up to invert the maneuver. However, Cormack manages to break free one of his legs, and drills Murdock in the face with one of his feet, prompting Murdock to let go of the hold. Murdock stumbles to the neutral corner, while the referee checks on Cormack. James Church takes this opportunity to get on the ring apron and drill Murdock in the face with a pair of brass knuckles. Murdock falls backwards as the referee looks to see the issue. By this point, Church is long gone, and the referee shrugs his shoulders, as Cormack goes for the cover...
The pinfall is broken up by both Buzz and Alpine. The referee grabs on to Buzz and leads him to his corner, while Alpine grabs a hurting Cormack and drags him back to his corner. As the referee turns around, he sees Alpine tag himself into the match, and he waits for Murdock to get to a better position for an attack.
Freddy Whoa: And this is what I've been waiting for. Brent Alpine in the match!
Zach Davis: Its been a long wait, and there's speculation that he will be walking out of this match the Television Champion once again. Let's see how he fares.
As Murdock makes it to his knees, he is brought back down with a Shining Wizard, before going for another pinfall. Bryan Worthy gets to the top of the turnbuckle as the referee starts to count...
Freddy Whoa: WHOA!
Zach Davis: From the top to break up the count! And it looks like the referee got caught up in it!
The referee is prone on the ground, as Buzz gets to his feet first. He pulls Brent Alpine off of Murdock, and tucks him in between his legs, but Alpine reverses it, instead scoring a back body drop instead.
Zach Davis: It looked as though Buzz was looking for the Buzz Bomb, but Alpine manages to evade it!
With both opponents down, and his partner still recovering, Brent looks to the turnbuckles, and starts to play to the crowd! He then shakes it off, and instead locks Murdock into Mount Unpleasant!
Freddy Whoa: Great move, except no referee!
Zach Davis: And Alpine is using the ropes for leverage! A taste of Gonzo's own medicine!
Alpine continues to hold the move, until Buzz kicks him in the back of the head, but a recovered Cormack in turn plows over Buzz with a lariat, turning him inside out in the process!
Zach Davis: And Cormack MacNeill is back to life!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA! INSTANT HANGOVER!
Zach Davis: And "The Shine" is back on his feet!
Cormack sees this, and he also plants a foot in the midsection of Brent Alpine, sending him flying outside of the ring over Deuce Murdock via another Instant Hangover. Cormack tries to grab on to Murdock, but Murdock evades by getting back out of the ring, pulling Cormack outside with him. As Cormack recovers from the unexpected move, his face meets more leather and sole, as Deuce hits him with a spinning roundhouse kick to the face...
Zach Davis: And he calls that "The Chuck Norris Special"!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! Did you see the whiplash on that?
Zach Davis: And here comes James Church!
Freddy Whoa: And a Chuck Norris Special for him, as well! And Church goes over the railing into the crowd!
Deuce looks to the ring, where he sees both Buzz and Alpine going toe to toe with each other in the middle of the ring. Both men are a blur, as both execute a full run, complete with leaps and drops, before Alpine catches him with...
Zach Davis: GLOW WORM!!! WHILE RUNNING!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA!
Alpine goes for the pin, but does not get the count. Meanwhile, Murdock climbs the turnbuckles, and looks shaky doing it.
Zach Davis: Something tells me Murdock might not want to stay up there...
Alpine gets to his feet and rushes the turnbuckle, but Murdock comes off the top with an ax handle smash. Alpine strikes Murdock as he comes down, before trying to set him up for The Glow Worm...
Zach Davis: Did you just see that?
Freddy Whoa: Murdock just blocked the move by grabbing the ropes, while The Shine just spun into the ground! And here comes another referee!
Zach Davis: About time! This match could have been over a handful of times, already!
Murdock signals for the end, and grabs Alpine from the ground. He hoists him up in what looks to be a brainbuster maneuver, only for both Cormack and Buzz to tackle him from either side of him. Murdock drops Alpine, and he falls on everyone underneath of him!
Zach Davis: Wow!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa!
Alpine lands on top of Murdock!
Zach Davis: WHOA!
Freddy Whoa: Hey there...
The bell sounds.
Zach Davis: The Team Formerly Known As Sequitus gets the win!
The bell sounds as Alpine gets to his feet. The referee raises his hand as his music plays.
Freddy Whoa: Since coming back, Brent Alpine has been unbelievable!
Zach Davis: And unbeatable!
Alpine exits the ring. He backpeddles up the ramp, looking around as the fans react to his win.
Freddy Whoa: Several months ago people were calling Brent Alpine and ICE Beckman the future of this business. Now, ICE Beckman is the World Champion. Can Brent Alpine prove those people right... and win War?
Zach Davis: Let's not forget, Cormack MacNeill was part of the winning team too. What about Cormack?
Freddy Whoa: Former Sequitus members are rising, that's for sure, Zach.
Slam goes to commercial.
The scene opens up and Gray Pierce is meditating on a rug in the middle of his dressing room. There’s a knock on the door and Gray opens his eyes.
Livewire: Can’t you read, the sign clearly says Do Not disturb…
He opens the door and Ice Beckman and Steve Orbit come barging in, knocking him out of the way.
Livewire: What the hell do you guys want?
Ice Beckman: Nice room! Did they convert a broom closet for you.
ICE and Orbit laugh.
Steve Orbit: Don’t go insulting broom closets, this is more like a shitter without a toilet… it smells like one at least.
ICE and Orbit laugh again.
Livewire: Very funny guys, now if you would, please get the fuck out!
Steve Orbit: I don’t think so, loser. This is Vapor Kings Territory, and you’re on our turf.
Livewire: What the hell do you mean, Vapor Kings Territory.
Ice Beckman: I’m the World Champ, Orbit here is the Hardcore Champ… hell, this whole PLACE is Vapor Kings Territory. So scram kid.
Livewire: I’m not going anywhere, you guys get out of here before this becomes a problem.
Steve Orbit walks over to an acoustic guitar on a guitar stand. He lifts it up.
Livewire: Don’t touch that.
Beckman puts an arm out and holds Livewire back.
Steve Orbit: Nice piece. Very nice.
He starts strumming it the guitar making sounds that couldn’t even accidentally be called music. Beckman nods his head to the ‘beat’ and sings.
Ice Beckman: ‘Livewire sucks… he lost to me next he’s gonna lost to STEVE!’ HAHAHAHA!
Steve and Ice laugh again.
Livewire: You guys are a laugh a minute. We’ll see whose laughing last when I take that title from you at SLAM 300.
Orbit motions to hit Gray with his own guitar, causing him to cover his head with his hand, and then he stops. ICE and Orbit laugh hysterically.
Steve Orbit: You fucking pussy. Scared of your own shadow I bet.
Livewire looks up to see Ice and Orbit still laughing at each other, rifling through his shit.
Livewire: Alright guys, enough is enough. Get the fuck out already.
Orbit motions to strike Livewire with the guitar again forcing him to step back as they ransack his room.
Livewire: What are you guys looking for?
Beckman suddenly stops on top of the rug that Livewire was meditating on. He turns around, and you hear a ‘zip’ and a stream is seen forming a puddle on the rug.
Livewire: Are you pissing on my rug, you piece of trash?
Orbit motions again to hit Livewire with the guitar forcing him to again step back as Ice finishes his business. He turns around and shows gray a can of ‘Whoop Ass’ Beer. He crushes the can and tosses it his way.
Ice Beckman: That recipe is mine, bitch!
Beckman leaves the room, and Orbit goes to follow, but not before giving Gray one last shot.
Steve Orbit: And in 2 weeks, you’ll be crying on your daddy’s tit again after I beat you to a bloody pulp in our hardcore match.
Orbit hits the guitar on the walk, destroying it and smashing it into tiny pieces before leaving the room. Gray drops to his knees to look at the wreckage. He looks at the crushed can in one hand, and the neck of his guitar hanging by strings in the other hand. He gives a determined and pissed off look into the camera as the scene fades.
The lights in the arena fade out. After a few suspense filled seconds the words ‘The Dynasty’ appear in bold italic lettering on the jumbotron as the beginning of “300 Violin Orchestra” begins to play. A single spotlight turns on and illuminates the silhouette of a man standing on the stage. As the song begins to speed up, the lights come on revealing Jonny Fly.
Fly stands on the stage with his eyes directly fixed on the ring. The jumbotron changes to the words ‘This is the Era of Jonny Fly.’ The music slows down and a barrage of fireworks begins to go off behind Fly. His eyes remain fixed on his opponent throughout. Slowly and deliberately he begins to make his way toward the ring. The music picks up one last time and Fly stops at the bottom of the ramp with his eyes still directly fixed on the ring. He stops and takes a few moment to exchange a long stare with his opponent before finally sliding into the ring.
Zach Davis: No one else is here yet. What was Jonny Fly staring at?
Daniel Booker shows up.
Freddy Whoa: Well that was unenergetic.
The house lights go out, as lighter colored lights come on. The multiple cameras pan around a jam packed US Airways Center. The fans are holding up various signs. The atmosphere is explosive and some of the crowd is cheering. While, the rest, of the crowd are booing. "Breathe" by Prodigy begins to play. The bass like synth begin to blare out. 14 seconds later the drums come through...
BREATHE WITH ME!!
Kyle Steel: Weighing in at 305 pounds, from the deepest, darkest part of a sick man's psyche...... O-O-O-OBLI-I-IVI-I-I-I-O-O-O-O-NN-N-NN-N!!!
The house lights go out. The crowd begins to murmur. Strobe lights begin to flash, as bright white lasers begin to flash. Two bright spotlights hit the entrance stage. The music continues to thump. Some of the fans are thrashing and/or dancing a long with the music...
Explosive fire pyro shoots straight up, on the stage and down the ramp. Then right about that time, Oblivion slowly slinks out. The music continues the blare out and rattled the arena.
Breathe the pressure
The cameraman gets real close, as Oblivion sneers at the camera. The Monster thrusts out IT's massive right arm, pushing the cameraman several feet away. The Monster slowly comes down to the ring. Strobe lights continue to flash. Then the US Airways Center slightly shakes, as the sound of thunder rumbles and mock lightning flashes. The majority, of the crowd, jump.
Come play my game
The music continues to thump out of the arena's speakers, as the addictive rhythm has the entire crowd in a trance and continues to dance along with the music. Lightning strikes the four corners, of the ring. The loud sounds makes everyone jump out of their seats, once again. Some, of the people are scared out of their minds. The lights flicker then... POP!! The strobe lights go out!!
The house lights come on, then standing in the center of the ring, is Oblivion. Half the crowd is cheering, while the other half of the crowd is booing. The music fades out. A screeching sound echoes throughout the arena, as four lightning bolts strike each corner.
Cells by the Servant plays.
Zach Davis: This match is brought to you by Sin City 2, in theaters a few weeks ago. But you assholes were too busy seeing Guardians of the Galaxy.
Anyway, Steeltoe Joe is here.
"I CAN'T STOP-OP-OP-OP-OP-OP..."
The lights dim as "Who Gon Stop Me" by Kanye West & Jay-Z plays over the PA. A pink strobe light flashes rapidly throughout the arena-- pink lasers swirl around the entranceway and eventually converge into a big pink spotlight, as Buddy Roman steps out from behind the curtain, followed by "The Mack" Steve Orbit. Orbit's wearing a long mink over his ring gear, which consists of alligator skin wrestling shorts and matching boots. He's also got his pink hat with a feather, a thick gold chain with a diamond-coated Jesus peice, and a jewel encrusted cane. Buddy and Orbit embrace in a hug, before Orbit struts towards the ring, followed by Roman, ignoring the boos from the crowd. At ringside, he removes his hat and coat, and kisses the cross on his chain before handing it to Buddy Roman. Upon entering the ring, he climbs one of the turnbuckles and gyrates his hips. "OR-BIT SUCKS" chants can be heard throughout the arena. He climbs down from the turnbuckle and strategizes with Roman in the corner, waiting for the match to start.
Never Gonna Stop hits the PA system as the arena begins to fill with smoke. Rob Zombie Vocals smash the speakers as the spot light is shown ZMAC whose stand out in the middle section of the area. He begins to walk down towards the ring then gets body surfed down to the crowd barrier. He hops the barrier and slides into the ring. The Honey Badger has arrived.
Perfect Insanity by Disturbed sounds through the arena as Chelsea Armstrong steps through the curtains meeting both cheers and boos from the crowd. Standing at the top of the ramp she looks to her left and then her right before looking straight at the ring and walking down passing through the various colors lasers shining down from the titantron and going across the crowd.
Kyle Steel: Hailing from St. Louis Missouri she is The Sweet Nightmare...Chelsea Armstrong!
She mumbles to herself almost as if talking to herself before she climbs the steps to the ring, taking one last look behind her at the seemingly empty black floor she crosses through the ropes and climbs the nearest turnbuckle. The music begins to fade as she jumps down and awaits the start of the match all the while still mumbling carelessly to herself. Just before the bell rings her eyes will flash their bright emerald color as a wicked smile comes over her ruby red lips.
The lights in the arena go black. The only light is the words "It's time" written in neon green on the titantron. Disturbed "Criminal" starts to play as the entrance lights up green. Out walks Justin Cash who has his back to the crowd. After a few moments green fireworks explodes revealing a money symbol. The lights turn back on. Justin spins around and throws both hands to the sky and then saunters to the ring. As he is walking to the ring he is bad mouthing the fans. He climbs into the ring and walks to a corner post climbs it and raises both middle fingers to the crowd.
Zach Davis: This team certainly wins the battle of the entrances!
All eight men are in the ring. Booker and Fly stick together of course, as do Orbit at McMorris, but everyone else is restless. Soon it is decided.. Jonny Fly and Steve Orbit will start the match.
Freddy Whoa: WHOA! ONE MAIN EVENT! Right here, right now!
The bell sounds.
Zach Davis: HERE WE GO!
Fly and Orbit pace around one another. As they go to tie up, Orbit rolls through and tags in Justin Cash.
Freddy Whoa: What is the opposite of whoa? That's what I want to say right now.
The fans boo as Cash enters the ring. Cash runs at Fly but Fly pie-faces him.
Zach Davis: This guy is the newest, rookie-ist guy on the roster, and he's in here with a legend like Johnny Fly.
Freddy Whoa: But he's hungry. Fly shouldn't take him so lightly.
Cash gets back to his feet and runs at Fly again. Fly goes to pie-face him, again, but Cash ducks it and hits the ropes. Cash bounces back, Fly turns, bam!, Cash hits a Clothesline. Fly goes down, gets back up, EATS A BIG BOOT!
Zach Davis: BIG BOOT TO JOHNNY FLY!
Cash drops and pins Fly.
No!, Fly kicks out.
Freddy Whoa: Pinning Johnny Fly will make the career of a man like Cash here. No relation to Waylon, by the way.
Cash picks Fly up and puts him in a headlock. He backs up into his corner and Chelsea tags herself in. Chelsea Springboards into the match with an Axe Handle Smash to the back of Fly's back.
Zach Davis: We've seen Chelsea Armstrong put together a surprising coalition of wrestlers so far, and they've got to be going after Pantheon's territory as THE stable in WCF. We've seen Orbit defect, Jeff Purse get injured... They've got Daniel Booker but Pantheon ain't what it used to be.
Chelsea Black Armstrong stomps on Fly's back several times as Fly yells out in pain. She then picks him up and throws him to the corner before running towards him.
Freddy Whoa: SPLASH!
No!, Fly moves away and Chelsea hits the turnbuckle! Chelsea stumbles back, right into Fly who quickly lifts her up and drops her..
Zach Davis: DEATH VALLEY DRIVER.
Fly, still dazed, stumbles away and tags in Daniel Booker.
Freddy Whoa: We're calling Cash a rookie, but we can't forget about Daniel Booker. He may be in Pantheon but he hasn't been here much longer than Cash has.
Booker comes in and runs at Chelsea, hitting her with a stiff kick to the gut. She doubles over and he hooks her for a Snap DDT, but Chelsea jabs him in the stomach several times. She then reverses..
Zach Davis: NORTHERN LIGHTS!
Into the pin!
NO!, Booker kicks out!
Freddy Whoa: He ain't Pantheon for nothing!
Chelsea gets up and tags Zombie McMorris into the ring. McMorris enters, happy to take the wind out of Pantheon's sails. Booker is up and before anything, McMorris pokes him in the eye. He then throws him to the ropes and hits a Scoop Slam as he comes back.
Zach Davis: One week from today the new Tag Team Champions, Jonny Fly and Corey Black, go into battle with Steve Orbit and ICE Beckman. The Pantheon versus Vapor Kings struggle is real.
Booker stumbles up and McMorris hits a haymaker.. than another.. than another!
Freddy Whoa: Multiple haymakers!
McMorris hits one last impactful one and it sends Booker flying... into his corner, to tag in Steeltoe Joe!
Zach Davis: Here comes the People's Pastor!
The fans forget Joe's recent transgressions as he enters the ring. McMorris runs at him and goes for a Big Boot but Joe grabs the leg and spins him around. As Zombie is face to face, Joe grabs him.
Freddy Whoa: Belly to Belly!
McMorris is sent flying into his corner and Cash tags himself back in. Cash enters and runs at Joe who grabs him and drops him with a Flapjack. Cash gets back up quickly and Joe runs at him and Spears him down!
Zach Davis: HUGE Spear! Wow!
Joe lifts Cash up and hits him with a forearm before Suplexing him in the air.
Freddy Whoa: And he's holding it. Cash isn't a small man... WOW! What strength of Steeltoe Joe!
After several moments Joe drops Cash with a Brainbuster!
Zach Davis: STRONGHOLD!
Joe floats over and goes for the pin.
No!, Chelsea breaks it up!
Freddy Whoa: Chelsea Armstrong is here to build a legacy, and losses don't fall into that legacy, clusterfuck or not!
Chelsea waits for Joe to stand before backing up and running at him, hitting a Shining Wizard right to his head! The ref then yells at her to get out of the ring, which she does. This gives Cash the opportunity to tag in Steve Orbit.
Zach Davis: Andddd Orbit enters the match!
Joe is crawling towards Oblivion but Orbit grabs his leg and pulls him away.
Crowd: WE WANT OBLIVION! WE WANT OBLIVION!
Orbut stomps away at Joe several times before picking him up and hitting him with several quick jabs. Orbit then grabs the back of Joe's head and runs, executing a Bulldog. Joe lands near the turnbuckle, a neutral turnbuckle, and Orbit follows it up with a Split Legged Moonsault!
Freddy Whoa: Into the pin!
No!, Joe powers out of it!
Zach Davis: AGAIN, what strength!
Joe crawls towards Oblivion yet again but again Orbit stops it. He grabs Joe's leg and decides to Grapevine it.
Crowd: WE WANT OBLIVION! WE WANT OBLIVION!
Neither Fly nor Booker want to see Joe tap. They jump into the ring and break up the pin!
Freddy Whoa: Here come Pantheon!
Fly and Booker lift Orbit up and execute a Double Suplex. The ref yells at them to leave, which they do. Joe again begins crawling towards Oblivion.
Zach Davis: Never thought I'd see the People's Pastor going to tag in the Monster, Oblivion, but that team needs him right now.
Orbit stumbles to his feet...
Freddy Whoa: JOE DIVES!
NO! Zombie McMorris pulls Oblivion off the apron as Joe dives. Joe misses, of course. Orbit hits several strikes from behind before lifting Joe up. Joe shoves Orbit away, Orbit runs at him and Joe executes a Belly to Belly into the turnbuckle!
JOE TAGS IN OBLIVION!
Oblivion enters the ring as Orbit stumbles up. Oblivion grabs him.
Zach Davis: GUTWRENCH POWERBOMB!
Oblivion rolls away and gets back up. Orbit summons his strength to sit up but Oblivion runs at him and kicks him in the head. Oblivion hits the ropes, bounces, comes back, jumps and drops a leg. He gets back up and lifts Orbit with him. Orbit repels himself backwards, bounces off the ropes, and runs at the Monster. Oblivion catches him and hits a Tiltawhirl Backbreaker!
Freddy Whoa: DAMN!
Zach Davis: The Monster is in control here tonight!
Oblivion pins Steve Orbit.
NO! Orbit kicks out!
Freddy Whoa: Before all of this.. unpleasantness.. Steve Orbit was one of the greatest World Champions we have ever seen. Don't forget that.
Oblivion lifts Orbit up and shoves him into the corner. His own corner. He wants Orbit to tag. Orbit tags in McMorris.
Zach Davis: Oblivion wants fresh meat!
McMorris enters the mat and runs at Oblivion... Obi drops him with a BLACK HOLE!
Freddy Whoa: OUT OF NOWHERE!
Oblivion then turns and wants to end the match. He tags in, of all people, Jonny Fly.
Zach Davis: Fly is up top...
FLY FLIES OFF WITH THE FLYSWATTER!
Freddy Whoa: NO! MCMORRIS ROLLED AWAY!
McMorris just tagged in Justin Cash. Fly's momentum gets him to his feet and he runs at Cash, but Cash lifts him into the Gorilla Press and drops him!
Zach Davis: Once again, what strength shown by Justin Cash!
Cash drops and pins Fly.
NO! Fly kicks out!
Freddy Whoa: Again, how amazing would it be for Justin Cash's career if he pinned Jonny Fly?
Zach Davis: One week from War, nonetheless!
Fly rolls away and tags in Joe. Joe goes face to face with Cash.
Freddy Whoa: Powerhouse versus Powerhouse!
Both men begin trading blows! Rights and lefts fly from both men until Steeltoe Joe gets the advantage. The former People's Champion sends Justin Cash to the ropes before kicking him in the gut.
Zach Davis: Oh no... can he do this?...
Joe lifts Cash up..
Freddy Whoa: POWERBOMB!
JOE POWERBOMBS CASH! Joe drops down and pins Cash, hooking the leg!
NO! CASH KICKS OUT!
Zach Davis: WOW!
Freddy Whoa: JUSTIN CASH PROVING HE BELONGS HERE!
Joe turns and tags in Oblivion. Oblivion stomps towards Cash. He grabs him and lifts him up...
Zach Davis: Oblivion has the newbie high in the air!
Oblivion goes to slam Cash down but Cash grabs Oblivion's head.
Freddy Whoa: CASH DROP! HE HITS IT!
Cash throws his arm over Oblivion!
Zach Davis: NO! OBLIVION KICKS OUT AT THE LAST SECOND!
Cash thought he had it won so he's up and he's crazy, he's livid. He runs towards his corner and tags in Chelsea. Meanwhile, Oblivion is already working his way up.
Freddy Whoa: This match has been unbelievable.
Oblivion sees Chelsea Armstrong and he roars. He runs at her...
Zach Davis: SHE HAS HIM!
LIGHTS OUT! SHE HITS HER TILTAWHIRL SLAM!
Freddy Whoa: LIGHTS OUT!
Chelsea drops and pins the Monster.
Zach Davis: CHELSEA ARMSTRONG HAS PINNED OBLIVION!
The bell sounds.
Freddy Whoa: There you have it! Chelsea Armstrong, Justin Cash, and the Vapor Kings pick up the victory!
Chelsea Armstrong gets to her feet and gets her arm raised. Fly and Booker drop to the apron.
Zach Davis: This match has serious War implications. Chelsea Armstrong has been building momentum as of late, building up her faction, AND she gets a win here?
Freddy Whoa: She's clearly a force to reckoned with, Zach. She just proved it.
The People's Champion gets her belt before climbing to the top and raising it to the air.
Zach Davis: But can she defeat Alex Richards?
Jonny Fly has his Tag Team Championship of course. Orbit glares at him from inside the ring and makes the "belt" motion around his waist.
Freddy Whoa: We've also got Pantheon versus the Vapor Kings for the Tag Team Titles. Can Fly and Black survive the onslaught of Beckman and Orbit?
Zach Davis: Don't forget, we've got... WAR. We've got TORTURE. We've got Jayson Price, and we've got Gravedigger. Who else is going to show up!?
Freddy Whoa: What about the darkhorses? Jay Omega, Livewire, anyone can win War this year!
Zach Davis: But only one person will.
The lights go black again. A bright light from the titon tron once again, angels singing, and Father Terry Andrews, the puppet priest appears on the screen.
Freddy Whoa: Uh, we just did our PPV wrap up speech... what the hell is this!?
The fans boo.
Father Terry Andrews: Everyone can clear the ring, except for Jonathon Fly, please.
A bit confused any remaining competitors clear the ring, except for Jonny Fly and Daniel Booker. They both re-enter, standing in the middle of it.
Father Terry Andrews: Disciple Daniel, if you do not clear the ring, then I am afraid you will subjected to the punishment that Jonathon Fly is going to be subjected to for all of his sins.
Daniel just puts his hands up in bring it on fashion. Durning this a very giant figure dressed in a long black duster, long black pants, black boots, a black shirt, and a black hat makes his way over the guardrail. Jonny and Daniel do not see this, they are too busy paying attention to the puppet.
Father Terry Andrews: To quote from the book of Revelation Chapter 9, verse 11: And they had a king over them, which is the angel of the bottomless pit, whose name in the Hebrew tongue is Abaddon, but in the Greek tongue hath his name Apollyon. Thats right Jonathon Fly, this scripture describes The Destroyer. The angel of the abyss, the Angel of Destruction, Abaddon.
At this point the giant man is in the ring behind Jonny and Daniel. He towers over even Jonny Fly at 6'5". This man is about 7'1".
Father Terry Andrews: And Jonthon and Booker, you are about to be introduced to him.
They look at each other and thats when Daniel bumps into the giant man, whose name is understood by now to be Abaddon. He begins by hitting Daniel with a massive right hand. Jonny turns and begins trying to hit Abaddon, but he blocks it and hits Jonny with a harsh right as well. Daniel comes back and Abaddon puts up a big right boot, knocking Daniel down. He grabs Jonny Fly around the neck, but out from the back comes Corey Black, speeding down the ring with a chair in his hands. He slides in the ring and just as Abaddon is picking Jonny up for a chokeslam, Corey smacks him in the back with the chair. Abaddon drops Jonny and turns on Corey. Corey swings again, striking Abaddon in the head. He doubles over into the corner as all three members of Pantheon being to gang up on him. This goes on for a moment, rights and lefts, kicks, punches flying. Until the big man has had enough. He throws them off him in one swoop, he stands and they go flying. Jonny flies out of the ring. Corey comes back at Abaddon quickly, however, Abaddon smacks his giant hand around Corey's neck. Daniel Booker comes running at the big man as well, but his other giant hand smacks around Daniel's neck. For a moment he stands there, then lifts them both up, and sends them crashing to the ground, hard, as he connects with a double chokeslam. Jonny Fly rolls into the and stands up. Abaddon comes turns and sees him standing. But someone else comes through the crowd.
Zach Davis: I don't understand what is going on here Freddy? This man has come out here and des-WAIT A MINUTE!!
Freddy Whoa: ITS JEFF PURSE!!! JEFF PURSE IS BACK!!! HE IS HERE TO HELP HIS PANTHEON BUDDDIES!!!
Zach Davis: Sure enough, Jeff Purse has just come through the crowd.
Jeff slides into the ring and stands between Jonny and Abaddon, protecting Jonny. But in a moments notice, he spins and delivers a kick right to the chin of Jonny Fly. The crowd grows unusually silent.
Zach Davis: What...?
Freddy Whoa: Whoa...
Father Terry Andrews: Aww, whats the matter disciples? You were expecting the Angel of Death to be all I brought to assist me on my conquest of the WCF. I met Jeff at St. Callahans Home for the Mentally Ill Prepared. He was admitted against his will by his doctor, Stella Montgomery. It took a good amount of time to convince Jeff to join the good fight. But now that he is mine, the bend to our will. Jonathon Fly, consider this Jeffrey's resignation from your sinful group. Consider this to be the end of you mentoring a young, poor, defensless young man. And allow me to introduce all of you to The Rapture, Jeffrey Purse, new and improved.
The whole speech Jeff stands there, staring at Jonny Fly laid out on the mat. He isn't blinking. There is a shot of this for about thirty seconds. The scene cuts away.
Scene begins as we see Deuce Murdock conversing with two of Jahani al-Reb's scantily clad guards. The mood is relaxed, even casual, among the three of them, as Deuce says...
Gonzo: So its settled. To the bus!
As Gonzo turns, he sees an infuriated al-Reb approaching. Jahani says...
al-Reb: What is this madness? My two leading guards? Seduced by this.. this... white devil and his Western decadence? This is MY HARAM! You both will be dealt with accordingly!
Jahani raises a hand; the women flinch away. But Deuce catches al-Reb's wrist, eyeing him with stony resolve.
Gonzo: Do you treat to your mother this way, too?
al-Reb: Do not speak of my mother with your foul, infidel tongue!
Jahani's jaw is clenched, eyes burning with a hurt deeper than fundamentalist madness. Deuce smiles wickedly at the emotions playing across al-Reb's face as he shakes his head. With a light, sardonic laugh he releases his grip on Jahani.
Gonzo: Ladies, feel free to let Mr. al-Reb know how you feel...
Both women look at each other and exchange a few comments to each other in what sounds to Deuce as Urdu, before both women raise their guns on Jahani al-Reb. His face drops as he defiantly states...
al-Reb: Infidels, all of you! We will meet Allah together!
Both women fire, and the sounds of toy gun fire can be heard, as a charging al-Reb stops suddenly; a look of shock replaces the one of fury. He blinks a thin, reddish liquid from his eyes -- then clutches at his face and drops to his knees, howling in pain. Deuce laughs with malicious delight as al-Reb tries to rub the hot pepper sauce from his face; but instead finds himself only in making it worse. Satisfied that he's made his point, Deuce drapes his arms over the ladies' shoulders and the three walk away, leaving Jahani sobbing on the floor.
The Caucasian funk of Red Hot Chilli Peppers' "Soul to Squeeze" hits the PA system.
Zach Davis: What's with this music? The Chilli Peppers? Are we in an intermission?
Freddy Whoa: I guess so. No one on the roster uses that song for their entrance. I'm-a go stretch my legs and smoke a fat blunt, Zach.
Zach Davis: I'm gonna rub one out. You seen them new Kaley Cuoco nudes?
Zach's eyes suddenly grow wide.
Zach Davis: WHOA! WHOA!
Freddy Whoa: Hey! That's my line, cracka!
Zach Davis: Look! In the stands!
A spotlight picks up movement among the audience members-- no, they're not dispersing in the wake of some lone gunman going on a rampage-- they're turning and pointing and cheering for Bobby Cairo!
Zach Davis: The Godfather is here! We haven't seen him in months!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa, dawg! What's he doing here? I thought he was crippled at XIII!
Zach Davis: Bobby Cairo is never down and out! That's one thing you can count on in life!
The smooth crooning of the Chilli Peppers continues as Cairo makes his way down the handicapped ramp in his custom-designed hydraulic wheelchair. Security guards flank him on either side, but he shoos them away like the pests that they are and swats hands and butts with his adoring fans.
Zach Davis: Bobby Cairo is a man of the people!
Freddy Whoa: That's right! He don't like no damn rent-a-cops stealing his ass-poon neitha!
Cairo makes his way down to the fan barrier and then flips over the barrier, never leaving his wheelchair or losing his balance as he does so-- defying gravity, really.
Zach Davis: Incredible agility for a quadriplegic!
Freddy Whoa: Furrealz, dawg. He's like a-- a inspiration for crippled folks. Gotta give it up for Bobby Cairo.
A fan in the audience holds up a sign that reads "BO-LIEVE IN BOBBY CAIRO!" as Cairo wheels his way up the ramp into the ring.
Zach Davis: I wonder what Bobby could be here for tonight? Is he going to give us an official farewell speech? He never did say goodbye after XIII. He kinda just... disappeared on some Natalie Imbruglia shit.
Freddy Whoa: You mean Amelia Earhart, dawg?
Zach Davis: Nah. Her name was Natalie Imbruglia, Freddy.
Cairo accepts a microphone from the So Cal Val lookalike ringside attendant and wheels around the ring from side to side, rallying his supporters, whipping them into a frenzy on some FDR shit.
Crowd: BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C!
Bobby Cairo: Yeah! Montgomery! The Godfather is here!
The crowd shit-cum-gasms and their chants grow louder.
Crowd: BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C!
The arena is visibly shaking from the roar of the crowd.
Bobby Cairo: I am here tonight in this historic city to deliver a vitally important message to the WCF Universe: The rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated!
Crowd: BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C!
Bobby gazes proudly unto his sea of supporters, his tailored suit lending a regal air to the great man.
Bobby Cairo: But that's not all! I'm here to announce that I, yours truly, "The Godfather of Professional Wrestling" Robert H. Cairo will be competing at War in Phoenix, Arizona next Sunday!
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! BOBBY C! HOLY SHIT! BOBBY C! HOLY SHIT! BOBBY C!
The rival chants threaten to create a seismic cataclysm that would swallow the city whole. Additionally, they completely drown out Metallica's "Master of Puppets", which means the crowd doesn't immediately notice WCF owner Seth Lerch as he swaggers down to the ring like he's some kinda King Big Shit. Once they do see Seth on the Slam-A-Tron their cheers and chants turn to boos and catcalls. Garbage is pelted Seth's way, including used tampons.
Zach Davis: Total disrespect being directed toward the WCF owner by these fans, and who can blame them? They're here to listen to The Godfather's blockbuster announcement, not Seth's blathering!
Freddy Whoa: Seth looks pissed too! You think that cracka would be happy that Bobby's competing in War, but no. What's up Seth's ass tonight?
Seth climbs into the ring and grabs a mic from the So Cal Val lookalike. He tries to flirt with her but she snubs him. Seth frowns and turns his attention to Bobby.
Seth Lerch: Hey! What's up?
Cairo looks annoyed.
Bobby Cairo: What do you want, Seth? I'm conducting business in my office. There's not a dry pair of panties, boxers or briefs in this building tonight, and that's for various reasons, all of which are related to my announcement that I will be competing at War next week in Phoenix, BER GARD, Arizona!
Crowd: BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C!
Seth scolds the fans and tells them to shut up before turning his focus back to Bobby.
Seth Lerch: You think this is how you're gonna do business in my company? Just show up when you please, no phone call, no email, no tweet, no text, NOTHING, and make announcements like you're some kinda god?
Bobby Cairo: Yeah! That's right! That's how I roll, nigga!
Cairo literally rolls back and forth in his wheelchair, taunting Seth, drawing the crowd into a bout of hysterics.
Seth Lerch: NO! NO! YOU DO NOT MOCK ME! Bobby, I thought we were friends? Why you not call me? Why you not give me a heads up, let me know what's going on? I'm sorry, you can't compete in War. It's too late. The card has been finalized. Besides, you're not even medically cleared to compete. You're in a wheelchair. If I let you in War I'd have to let Aaron Miles in and our insurance company would have an aneurysm trying to get you guys covered so--
Bobby leaps out of his wheelchair and hits Seth with a perfectly timed R-CAIRO, dropping the WCF owner to the mat in a defeated heap. Cairo kips up to his feet and pounds his chest like a mothafuckin King Kong as the crowd goes apeshit.
Crowd: BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C!
Zach Davis: R-CAIRO! I don't believe it! The Godfather just hit Seth with an R-CAIRO! But how? He's walking! He's not crippled! Bobby Cairo is not crippled! Was it all a ruse?
Cairo stands over Seth and looks down at the WCF owner, frowning as he does.
Freddy Whoa: These crackas used to be friends. Now they're bitter enemies. Crazy ass white folk.
Crowd: BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C! BOBBY C!
Bobby climbs onto the turnbuckles and salutes his fans, showing no signs of the injuries that kept him wheelchair bound for months.
Zach Davis: He's no longer just The Godfather of Professional Wrestling-- Bobby Cairo is The Bionic Godfather! He's half-man, half-machine! He has to be! It's the only explanation!
Vendors in the audience begin peddling Bionic Godfather T-shirts, the first batch of which sells out in thirteen seconds.
Freddy digs through his Twitter feed on his smartphone.
Freddy Whoa: #BionicGodfather is trending worldwide, Zach!
"Killing in the Name" by Rage Against the Machine hits the PA as Cairo hops off the turnbuckles and once again stands over the WCF owner, saluting the fans again before hopping out of the ring and making his way up the ramp with a triumphant pep in his step.
At ringside, a pair of stagehands finish setting up a ladder on either side of the ring, while a briefcase is lowered from the rafters on a steel cable. A spotlight shines on the briefcase as it descends, and the camera zooms in for a close up of the WCF logo emblazoned on the front before we cut to the announce team.
Zach Davis: What a night! If you're just joining us now ladies and gentlemen, I sincerely hope you subscribe to the WCF Network, so you can see tonight's show in its entirety when it gets added to the Network tomorrow. And if you're not a subscriber, what are you waiting for? It's only nine ninety-nine!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! Only nine ninety-nine?
Zach Davis: That's right, Freddy, only nine ninety-nine for unlimited access to the WCF's archived footage!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! What a deal! But don't forget about all the other extra stuff subscribers get access to; exclusive interviews, outtakes, and a whole bunch of other WCF content that's never been aired.
Zach Davis: Such as the missing XIII Pay Per View?
Freddy Whoa: I wouldn't get my hopes up about that.
Kyle Steel: It is now time for the WCF Sunday night Slam main event! The following is a SIX-man ladder match for the rights and recipe to Whoop Ass Beer! Introducing first, from Miller's Crossing, Ohio...
The irregular rhythmic drumming of Nine Inch Nails' "The Great Destroyer" blares in time with strobe flashing from the 'Tron. As the guitar and vocals kick in Hyena stalks onto the ramp, glaring at everything and nothing.
Kyle Steel: Weighing in at two hundred sixty-five pounds... HYEEENAAA!
Hyena purposely strides down the ramp, turning his glare toward the ring, He rolls his shoulders before hopping onto the ring apron and ducking under the top rope. He climbs the far turnbuckle and lets out a crazed, bestial roar, raising his arms defiantly to the crowd just as the lyrics announce "I am the Great Destroyer."
Zach Davis: Hyena doesn't look happy at the prospect of having to wrestle for something that should rightfully be his. Then again, Hyena rarely looks happy.
Freddy Whoa: And when he does, you best be runnin'. But why do you say that briefcase should be his? He didn't discover the recipe.
Zach Davis: Need I remind you it was his beer that Jay Omega stole?
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! How dare you besmirch the good name of our United States Champion?
Zach Davis: I see he paid you off again.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! I don't have to listen to these baseless accusations! A black man can't like a white dude without bein' on the take? That's racist!
The opening bars of I'm not Like Everybody Else by the Kinks begins and Alex Richards walks towards the ring with a huge smile on his smile. He holds his doctor's bag in one hand and with the other he takes turns slapping hands, hugging, signing autographs, high fiving, and occasionally delivering a more good natured than used to hard slap to a fan's hand. He wears his rusty bed spring, or as he calls it hardcore title over his shoulder as a memorial to the days he was champion.
Kyle Steel: Now approaching the ring, hailing from wherever needs pain, suffering, pills, or Zima; weighing in at three hundred forty-five pounds, the Archduke of Mass Confusion... ALEEEX RRRICHAAARDS!
Zach Davis: WCF's Archduke has a great love of alcohol, but will it be enough to overcome these staggering odds?
Freddy Whoa: Let's not forget who else in this match has a great love of alcohol, and ain't no stranger to staggering. Or staggering odds.
Zach Davis: I assume you're talking about the World Heavyweight Champion, Natural ICE Beckman?
Freddy Whoa: What? I was talkin' about Johnny Reb!
The house lights dim, and the intro to Lynnyrd Skynnyrd's "Sweet Home Alabama" hits the speakers. Hushed anticipation falls over the crowd as a spotlight illuminates the stage. Johnny Reb steps out from behind the curtain. A cheer goes up from the audience at his appearance.
Kyle Steel: Making his way to the ring, from Sweet Water, Alabama; weighing in at two hundred five pounds, he is the Inveterate Confederate... JOOOHNNYYY REEEB!
As the he walks down the ramp, a cascade of sparks rains down on the stage. The Inveterate Confederate circles the ring, slapping hands with the fans at ringside. Johnny eschews the steps completely; he leaps onto the ring apron and climbs the turnbuckles, posing for the cheering crowd for a moment before he jumps down, ready for the match to begin.
Zach Davis: Easily the smallest man in this match, the Inveterate One is usually at a disadvantage, but his honed speed and agility make him a strong contender in a ladder match.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! Did you just say that Johnny Reb is usually at a disadvantage? How long you been calling these matches? Reb is a veteran, and you don't last in this sport if you got a disadvantage.
Zach Davis: Well, he was attacked by Chelsea Armstrong's retinue earlier tonight, which apparently includes Cormack MacNeill now.
Freddy Whoa: Truth. I guess he ain't a hundred per cent.
"Hell Yea" by Rev Theory plays as the lights shut off. A spotlight shines on the entrance ramp and a shadow can be seen running towards it, growing larger and larger until the words hit on the music... "GIMME A HELL... GIMME A YEA!!" and Gray Pierce bursts through the curtains with and stops and accepts the cheers of the crowd.
Kyle Steel: From Long Island, New York; weighing in at two hundred twenty-five pounds, the Livewire... GRAAAYSOOON PIIEERCCE!
He works his way down the entrance ramp and slaps the hands of the adoring fans. When he gets to the ring he leaps onto the apron and wipes his feet before climbing through the top and middle ropes. He runs to one side, jumps on the bottom rope and leans forward making the rock star devil horns and sticking his tongue out at the crowd. The crowd cheers and women scream. He smiles his million dollar smile and he retreats to the corner waiting for the match to begin.
Zach Davis: Here we have the electrifying Grayson Pierce, who has the smallest stake in this match, but arguably the most to gain.
Freddy Whoa: I don't think this kid should even be in this match; he didn't have nothin' to do with any of this, 'cept bein' in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Zach Davis: Well, Jay Omega did try to implicate him in the original theft of Hyena's beer.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! If you don't stop talkin' smack about the U.S. Champ, I'ma belt you myself!
Zach Davis: No you won't.
Freddy Whoa: No I won't! But I will unplug yo' headset and toss it into the crowd!
"You're Gonna Go Far, Kid" by the Offspring hits the speakers and the arena lights dim. The stage lights pulse a deep green with each guitar note, and spotlights also flicker throughout the crowd in time to the guitar. As the lyrics say "dance, fucker, dance" Jay Omega steps from behind the curtain, and a spotlight hits him center stage.
Kyle Steel: From Sativa City, in the Imperial Isle of Maritopia, weighing in at two hundred twenty-six pounds, he is the United States Champion... JAAAY OOOMEEEGAAA!
With the United States Championship dangling in his right hand, Omega stops at the top of the ramp and slowly looks from right to left, then at the title belt as he raises it over his head. Jay gives himself a satisfied nod and lowers the belt, then starts down the ramp as the lyrics say "you're gonna go far, kid", and a pair of flares go off on either side of the ramp with each of the next three notes; a set of red at the top of the ramp, white from the middle, and blues at the end. Omega rolls under the bottom rope and heads to the far corner, and climbs up onto the second rope with one foot on the top turnbuckle. Jay puts an elbow on his raised knee, props his chin in his hand, and raises the title belt again with a bored expression. The arena lights up in a strobe effect from hundreds of cameraphones while Omega poses for a moment, then the house lights come back up as Jay hops down.
Zach Davis: And here we have the mastermind and perpetrator of this scheme, United States Champion, Jay Omega.
Freddy Whoa: Homeboy looks cool as a cucumber in there, even with Hyena staring daggers at him.
Zach Davis: I can't say that I'd be so collected if faced with the animalistic Hyena.
Freddy Whoa: That's 'cause you a pussy, Zach.
The arena is quiet with the lights all on when over the PA system a man asks "Are you drunk yet?" and the crowd responds with mostly cheers as "Feels Good Inc." by The Gorillaz hits the speakers. The lights begin to flash blue and white as two cannon shots of fake snow shoot out from the entrance area. Out from the snow comes Natural ICE Beckman holding a beer in his hand. He chugs the last half of the beer, then crushes the can in his hand before tossing it into the crowd.
Kyle Steel: Now coming to the ring, from Foam Lake, Wisconsin. Weighing in at two hundred fifty pounds. He is known as The True Cold Drunk, and is the WCF World Heavyweight Champion ...Natural ICE Beckman!!
ICE then smiles to the crowd going up and stealing beers from willing fans. He chugs the beers down the aisle until he reaches the ring. Once there he rolls into the ring, sitting up in the corner. He rests against the turnbuckle waiting for the match to begin and cleans his beard from the beer foam.
Zach Davis: With the arrival of World Champion ICE Beckman, all six participants are in the ring, and we are ready to go!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! And Hyena didn't want to wait any longer; he just rushed Omega with that spear!
(DING DING DING!)
Hyena flails on the downed Omega, while the Livewire moves in on Beckman. Alex shrugs and charges at Johnny, who wisely drops to the mat and rolls out of the ring. Reb grabs one of the ladders set up beside the ring as Richards follows him out to the floor; meanwhile, ICE backs Pierce into the ropes with a series of hard right hands, then whips him across the ring. Johnny smashes the top step into the Archduke's face, Grayson ducks under a clothesline to hit the opposite ropes, and Jay slams an elbow into Hyena's temple, then rolls him over and starts feeding the Manimal shots to the face. The Livewire rebounds with a lariat of his own that drops the World Champion to the mat, while Reb hits Richards with another ladder shot that still fails to take the stubborn Alex off his feet. The Archduke reels back, and Johnny mows him down with a running ladder strike to the chest.
Zach Davis: Johnny Reb making good use of that ladder, if not the use it was intended for. Grayson Pierce hits the ropes to pick up momentum, while Jay Omega stands up to stomp on Hyena's head. There's just so much going on at once, it's hard to call it all!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! Livewire just ran straight into a superkick from the U.S. Champ! He might wanna check if he's still got all his teeth!
Zach Davis: The Inveterate One sliding that ladder into the ring now, but World Champion Natural ICE Beckman is right there to stop him from climbing in after it.
Freddy Whoa: And that ain't good for Johnny, 'cause Alex Richards is getting up!
Omega pulls a dazed Grayson to his feet in a front facelock, then lifts him for a vertical suplex. Jay holds Pierce inverted for a few seconds, going so far as to walk in a small circle, but his grandstanding costs him as Beckman swings for the fences with the ladder he now holds. The feet of the ladder crash into both Jay and Grayson's heads and backs, sending Omega tumbling into the corner, while the Livewire topples off his shoulders and over the top rope; bouncing off the apron on his way to the floor. Hyena pulls himself to his feet in the ring and ICE turns to face him, while Johnny slides into the ring behind the World Champion. Richards pulls himself up using the apron, and lays eyes on Pierce twitching on the floor not far away.
Zach Davis: We're not even five minutes into this match, and it already looks like Grayson Pierce is out of the action!
Freddy Whoa: And something tells me Alex Richards ain't tryin to be helpful as he pulls the Livewire to his feet.
Zach Davis: Definitely not, as the Archduke lifts Pierce to his feet, then off of them! Alex Richards getting a full extension of the arms as he presses the Livewire over his head!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! Look out, Zach!
Freddy and Zach bail as Richards heaves Grayson across the announce table; Pierce almost clears the barricade, but clips his shoulder on the way down. In the ring, ICE hoists the ladder on his shoulder, threatening Hyena, and Johnny nails him from behind with a dropkick that sends the champ stumbling toward Hyena as the ladder falls off his shoulder and hits the mat with a clatter. The Manimal steps in and catches Beckman with a spinning spinebuster that plants ICE in the middle of the ring, while Omega uses the turnbuckles to drag himself back to a vertical base. Hyena pounds a fist into the side of Beckman's head, while Jay catches Reb's eye and motions for him to reposition the ladder. Omega then grabs Hyena with a rear waistlock, and nails a release German suplex that flips the Manimal head over heels to land chest first on the ladder as Johnny slides it into the way.
Zach Davis: Good God! That might have broken a rib!
Freddy Whoa: Or a couple. I don't think it's gonna stop Hyena, though.
Zach Davis: Alex Richards climbing back into the ring now, and he's got his eyes locked on Johnny Reb.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! Johnny saw him coming, and just hit a dropkick to the knee! Richards just crashed to the mat!
Alex cradles his knee for a moment before trying to get back to his feet, while the World Champion pushes himself to his knees, and shakes his head in an attempt to clear it. Beckman gets one foot under him when Jay comes in from the side with a Drive-By kick, and Johnny rolls out of the ring once again. Reb lifts up the ring skirt and fishes around under the ring for a moment, then re-enters the ring holding a kendo stick just as Richards pulls himself up along the ropes, favoring his right leg. A horizontal swipe with the Singapore cane doubles the Archduke over, and Johnny lands an overhand strike across Alex's shoulder blades. Richards arches his spine as he hobbles away from Reb, but the Inveterate One is right behind him; swinging at the damaged knee.
Zach Davis: Alex Richards sent back down to the canvas, but here comes Hyena!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! A huge Atomic Drop on the educated Southerner!
Zach Davis: Meanwhile, Jay Omega locks in a Sharpshooter on the World Champion. What is he thinking? There are no submissions in this match!
Freddy Whoa: Doesn't mean the holds don't hurt. Besides, you take out a man's legs, and he ain't gonna be climbing up that ladder any time soon.
Hyena pushes the assault, and hits Johnny from behind with a running forearm club to the back of the head, sending Reb tumbling through the ropes to the floor. The Manimal then turns around to charge at Omega with a running knee lift under the jaw to break up the Sharpshooter, but Beckman's relief is short-lived, as Hyena drops an elbow across the champ's lower back. The Livewire crawls back over the barricade still a little disoriented, and staggers past the announce table with each step steadier than the last. Johnny climbs to his feet and gives his head a shake, then circles the ring opposite Pierce. The two of them meet up by the second ladder and Reb takes the initiative with a kick to Grayson's midsection, then tries to slam Pierce's head off the apron but the Livewire blocks, then elbows Johnny off of him.
Zach Davis: And Johnny Reb demonstrates his quick thinking, by practically throwing that second ladder at Grayson Pierce! Pierce is dazed!
Freddy Whoa: But Reb ain't done yet; Johnny hops over the fallen ladder, grabs Pierce by the back of the head, turns him in a full circle for momentum... Whoa! Reb just drove the Livewire's face into the ringpost!
In the ring, Hyena has the first ladder set up, and is already up two rungs by the time Reb rolls back into the ring. Hyena moves at a measured pace, careful but not slow, while Johnny scampers up the other side of the ladder, and the two meet at the top. The Manimal and the Inveterate One trade a few punches, and the heavier Hyena takes the advantage with a cheap shot to the throat, then slams Johnny's face off the top step. The Manimal drives an elbow into the back of Reb's head, smashing his face off the top step again, then slowly climbs up another rung dragging Johnny with him. Now standing on the second last rung Hyena gives a feral grin, then pulls Reb in close, and gets him into the proper position.
Zach Davis: Oh no! Things are not about to go well for Johnny Reb, If Hyena is thinking what I think he's thinking!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA! Last Laugh off the top of the ladder! Both Johnny AND Hyena are down!
Zach Davis: And neither man is moving; I think Hyena might have just taken both of them out of the action!
Freddy Whoa: Check it out; Omega is back on his feet, and he's heading for the ladder!
Jay slowly climbs up the ladder still feeling the effects on having a knee slam into his jaw, while Alex Richards rolls out of the ring and works his knee. On the opposite side of the ring, Pierce climbs up onto the apron as Omega reaches the top of the ladder. Jay reaches up toward the briefcase dangling above him, and just manages to take hold with one hand when ICE surges up from the mat and barrels into the ladder shoulder first. Omega barely hangs on to the briefcase with one hand, suspended twenty feet above the ring, and the Livewire heads to the top rope. Jay kicks his legs trying to dislodge the briefcase, which sends him into a slow spin as Pierce measures the distance between himself and Omega. Just as Jay's spin brings him around to face the Livewire, Grayson leaps off the turnbuckle with a graceful spin of his own, and nails Omega in the chest with a flying tornado kick that breaks the U.S. Champion's grip on the briefcase, and sends both men plummeting to the canvas.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! High Voltage in mid-air! These cats are crazy!
Zach Davis: So it would seem, Freddy; why else would they be going through all this over something as simple as beer?
Freddy Whoa: It ain't just any beer, Zach, it's Whoop Ass Beer.
Richards roots around under the ring for a moment, then re-enters the fray holding a steel chair in each hand. Beckman sets the ladder up again after kicking Omega and Pierce out of the way, but before he can begin to climb it, Alex claps the steel chairs together on either side of ICE's head. The champ's legs fold like a bad poker hand and Beckman collapses to the mat. Richards starts to ascend the ladder, but the going is slow thanks to his damaged knee. Hyena manages to roll onto all fours, then pushes himself to his feet and tries to catch hold of Alex's leg. The Archduke reaches down to grab a fistful of Hyena's hair and drags him up onto the ladder, then smashes the Manimal's face against the side of the ladder to stun him. Richards then shifts on his precarious perch, and positions Hyena for a belly to back suplex.
Zach Davis: The carnage! Alex Richards just nailed Hyena with the Final Enlightenment from more than halfway up the ladder!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! There are bodies everywhere! The first man to make it back to his feet will have a huge advantage!
Johnny Reb and Grayson Pierce both use the ropes to pull themselves to their feet across the ring from each other, while Jay drags himself under the bottom rope and onto the apron. Gray and Johnny come together beside the ladder in the middle of the ring, and this time Pierce goes on the offensive with a European uppercut that has Reb reeling. The Livewire follows up with a trio of forearm shivers along the side of Johnny's jaw, but the Inveterate Confederate fires back, and paints the side of Pierce's face red with a vicious right hand. Grayson spin around from the force of the blow and Reb springboards off the second rope, spins in mid-air, and plants Pierce with a bulldog onto one of Alex's discarded chairs. On the apron Omega pulls himself up, but leans heavily on the ropes, apparently having a bit of trouble breathing. Johnny begins to climb up the ladder again, reaches the top, and stretches out his arm to reach for the briefcase. At that moment, Jay slingshots himself onto the top rope, then springs into the ring with a dropkick aimed at the ladder.
Zach Davis: Jay Omega topples the ladder once more, taking Johnny Reb with it!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! The Inveterate One landed crotched on the top rope! That's gotta hurt!
Alex Richards and ICE Beckman both climb heavily to their feet, but rather than attack each other, Beckman grabs hold of Omega as he rises, while Richards grips the rope Johnny straddles, and bounces it up and down a few times before he takes the Inveterate One to the floor with a charging lariat. The World Champion sets the United States Champion up, then delivers a powerful T-Bone suplex that plants him perpendicular on the fallen ladder. The only two men left standing, ICE and Alex lock up, albeit a little hesitantly on the champ's part. Richards quickly overpowers Beckman and forces him down to one knee, but ICE slips an arm free and delivers a crushing low blow to the Archduke that takes all the wind out of his sails.
Zach Davis: That's just poor sportsmanship on display from Natural ICE Beckman.
Freddy Whoa: No rules in a ladder match, playa. You do what you gotta do. That said, I feel ya. Fat bastard or not, you don't hit a man in the pills. It's just bad cricket.
Zach Davis: What, are you getting paid by Mike Meyers, too?
Beckman hits a dropkick that sends Alex stumbling back, then hits the ropes off to the side and comes back with a swinging neckbreaker to put Richards on his back. About the same time, the Livewire climbs unsteadily back to his feet, nearly loses his balance, and backpedals into the corner where he slumps against the turnbuckles. The World Champion spots this easy target as he climbs back to his feet, and rushes to the corner looking for a body avalanche. Pierce's eyes focus at the last moment and he drops out of the way, causing Beckman's chest to impact on the thin padding of the top turnbuckle. ICE staggers backward clutching his chest, and the Livewire pops back to his feet. Grayson makes a quick measurement, then springboards off the middle rope with a moonsault attack that flattens the World Champion.
Zach Davis: Great athleticism from Grayson Pierce! Even after all the abuse he's suffered in this match, he still has enough fight in him to take it to the champion!
Freddy Whoa: Yeah, but he's movin' pretty slow; that might have been the last bit of gas he had.
True enough, Pierce does take his time regaining his feet. Across the ring, Omega slowly climbs up to his feet as well, then grabs the ladder he'd been laying on and props it against the corner. Jay turns around to deal with the Livewire, when Hyena comes out of nowhere to spear him into the ladder he'd just set up. The steel frame buckles under the impact of both men; the ladder now resembling a drawn bow, and as Hyena stands up Grayson hits him from behind with a high elevation dropkick that sends the Manimal crashing face first into the ruined ladder. Pierce pushes himself back to his feet with a surge of adrenalin to the delight of the crowd, but the cheers quickly turns to boos as Beckman hits a German suplex on the Livewire.
Zach Davis: We're now down one ladder, but the mayhem continues! Alex Richards outside the ring by that second ladder, but I can't quite see what he's doing. Johnny Reb seems to have recovered a bit, as he's now rounding the corner behind the Archduke of Mass Confusion.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! Johnny Reb takes the big man down with a huge facebuster onto that ladder!
Richards rolls off the ladder with a container of margarine crushed against his ample belly, and Reb manhandles the semi-greased ladder onto the apron, only to have it driven into his face by a baseball slide kick from ICE. Johnny flies back against the security railing and the ladder drops down onto Richards, while Beckman climbs out of the ring to retrieve the last remaining means of capturing the briefcase. The World Champion slides the ladder into the ring, then takes a moment to stomp on the Archduke's head before he rolls back into the ring. ICE sets the ladder up under the briefcase, while Omega drags himself up using the bent ladder behind him. Beckman places one foot on the first rung of the ladder, and nearly chips a tooth as his foot slips off, causing him to overbalance and clip his mouth on one of the steps.
Zach Davis: So that's what Alex Richards was doing! He said he planned to grease the ladder, and it looks like his plan is working so far!
Freddy Whoa: Yeah, but he only got one side of the ladder, and not even all of it.
Jay grabs one of the chairs laying nearly forgotten in the ring, and moves to intercept the World Champion as he tries to climb the ladder a second time. ICE skips the first three rungs, and firmly places his foot against the fourth. Before he can hoist himself up, however, Omega swings at him with the chair. Beckman drops to the mat, and Jay hits the ladder instead; the reverberating shock making him drop the chair. ICE rolls back to his feet, buries a foot in Omega's gut, then hits him with the Beer Bong onto the chair. Pierce stands slowly and leans against the ropes for a moment, when Beckman rushes him with a powerful clothesline over the top rope. Grayson lands heavily on Richards, and the World Champion turns his attention back to the prize dangling above the ring.
Zach Davis: Natural ICE Beckman is the last man standing, and now he's making his way up the clean side of the ladder! This one could be over!
Freddy Whoa: We all knew the World Champ was a tough son of a bitch, and tonight he proved it once again!
ICE reaches the top of the ladder and stretches out an arm to take hold of the briefcase, when Johnny clambers up onto the apron, then amazingly springboards from the top rope onto the ladder. Beckman looks shocked for a moment, then grins as he grabs onto the briefcase with both hands and kicks away from the ladder, out of Johnny's reach. Reb's eyes go wide with horror as he realizes ICE's intent, but he's unable to get down before Beckman comes swinging back, and kicks the ladder over, taking Johnny with it. The World Champion struggles for a moment, but manages to unclasp the briefcase, and unceremoniously drop to the mat.
(DING DING DING!)
Zach Davis: A dazzling attempt from Johnny Reb to stop Natural ICE Beckman fell just shy of the mark, and this one is in the books!
Freddy Whoa: An incredible victory for Beckman, and a well deserved one, too.
Beckman gets to his feet and raises his briefcase high in the air. The referee then hands him his World Championship, which he raises in his OTHER hand.
Zach Davis: This is an important time for ICE Beckman. He may be the World Champion but he's never been a double Champion, and he has that chance at War.
Freddy Whoa: Not to mention the fact that he finds out who faces him at One... assuming Corey Black doesn't beat him at War 300.
Zach Davis: But MOST importantly... he's got the recipe to Whoop Ass Beer!
Beckman raises the briefcase once more before dropping down and rolling out of the ring.
As ICE Beckman celebrates their win with the recipe for Whoop Ass Beer. Oblivion stumbles down a dark corridor. The Monster stops walking and braces it self against a wall, then slowly slides down the wall. As Oblivion leans against the wall, The Monster bends IT's knees and places IT's forearms on IT's knees. Oblivion then, slowly takes off IT's mask. The camera turns away from IT. Oblivion speaks....
Oblivion: I cannot keep doing this. I have done some horrible... HORRIBLE things in my life....
The Monster drops the mask onto the concrete flooring.
Oblivion: Once everything went down, I saw the perfect opportunity. To have what he had. To TAKE what he had. It's been 5 years. 5 LONG GOD DAMN YEARS IN THIS CHARADE... It HAS to stop.... NOW!!!
The camera pans back towards Oblivion, who is sitting with IT's forearm on IT's knees. The camera adjusts for the lack of lighting and does a close up to the face under the mask of Oblivion...
Paul Jackson: SAY HELLO TO THE REAL OBLIVION. SURPRIIIIIIIIIIISE!!! Sorry, Stephan Johnson is currently disposed at the moment.
Scene slowly fades out and a man, dressed in a black suit walks up.
Man in dark suit: By now, there MUST be some confusion. We all thought that Stephan Johnson WAS Oblivion. And isn't Paul Jackson the man that killed Stephan Johnson's wife and new born baby, heinously leaving them hanging in trees? The baby hanging by it's own umbilical cord? Yes. 5 years ago Paul Jackson was convicted of one count of first degree murder and one count of second degree murder. In the process of transporting Mr. Jackson to the Pinellas County Jail, waiting to be transferred to the FSP Florida State Prison. In the process of transporting Mr. Jackson, some of the soon to be prison bound inmates, begin to make some noise. The bus guards begin to try to get the inmates to "SHUT THE FUCK UP", but something horrible happened. A long timed plan began to come into play. One of the inmates got loose from his shackles and began to attack on of the bus guards and the driver lost control, of the bus. The bus crashed in a fiery heap. Mr. Jackson, along with a few other inmates, who didn't get mangled in the crash, escaped. Paul Jackson, as we all by now was Stephan Johnson's best friend in middle and high school. He was desperately jealous of Stephan's relationship with Stephanie, who Stephan met in their freshman year in high school. They eventually got married right out of high school and right then Stephan went to Japan and Mexico for wrestling training. that was in the summer of 1990.
But, in that summer of 2005, Stephan came to the horrific crime scene and observed his wife and newborn child hanging in the tree, Stephan collapsed with a psychotic break and then eventually sent to The Withlacoochie Mental Hospital. after an extent investigation, it was discovered that Paul Jackson was obsessed with Stephanie Johnson. Paul Jackson, one time before tried to attack Stephanie. He was sent to the County Jail for a simple assault charge. But, it wasn't until several years later is when Mr. Jackson caught Stephanie off guard and by herself. Jackson didn't realize, at first, that Stephanie was pregnant. Paul Jackson WAS found and was arrested for the deaths of Stephanie Johnson and the unborn child. It didn't take the jury long to convict Paul Jackson of First degree and second degree murder. But, it was during the transportation of Mr. Jackson to the County Jail, is when the bus accident occurred. That is when Paul Jackson escaped...
*BEEP..... BEEP.... BEEP.... BEEP*
A voice: Where... where am I?
Nurse: DOCTOR!! DOCTOR!! COME QUICKLY!! THE PATIENT IS AWAKE!!
A few nurses scramble to a doctor. The doctor proceeds to flash a light in the eyes of the awakening patient.
Doctor: Do you know where you are at?
A voice: Where.... where am I?
Doctor: You are at The Withlacoochie Mental Hospital.
A voice: W-wh-why?
Doctor: You had a psychotic break and blacked out.
A voice: Wh-why would... please!! Where's Stephanie?! STEPHANIEEEEEEEEEEE!! WHERE ARE YOU, STEPHANIEEEE?!
Doctor: Your wife... I am sorry to report that your wife, Stephanie, is dead. So is your new born son. Do you remember any of this, Stephan?
A voice: DEAD?! STEPHANIE'S DEAD?! NOOOOOOO!! MY SON.... MY BABY BOY... DEAD?! HOW?! WHEN?! I JUST SAW STEPHANIE YESTERDAY.
The nurses and the doctor looks concerned at one another.
Doctor: Stephan. Do you know what year it is?
Stephan tries to speak through a dry mouth.
Stephan: Um... yes. It's um.... may I have a drink of water?
As a nurse proceeds to pour Stephan water into a plastic cup, Stephan sees the hospital room. The wires and the IV drips. Monitors. The nurse hands Stephan a cup of water, which Stephan sips the water. A small trickling tear falls down from the outer corner, of Stephan's left eye and down his cheek.
Stephan: Um, thank you. Yes, doctor. It's... it is 2005.
Doctor: Stephan, no. I am sorry to inform you, it is 2014. You have been in a chemically induced coma for 9 years.
SCENE FADES OUT THEN BACK TO OBLIVION SITTING ON THE GROUND WITH IT'S BACK AGAINST THE WALL.
Paul Jackson: This whole time, since 2009 I was portraying Ace Slaughter and then for kicks I wanted to change things up a bit and changed his name to Oblivion. Then things started to unravel beautifully. Things started coming into place. I TOOK AWAY HIS WIFE, HIS CHILD AND I ALSO TOOK AWAY HIS LIVELIHOOD... HIS CAREER!! While, he rots away in that mental hospital, I have done what he couldn't do! Now, things are starting to collapse around me. Don't know what is about to happen....
Slam fades to black.