the Rupp Arena in Lexington, Kentucky
As Slam is live, the lights suddenly fade low, bathing the arena in darkness. After a few seconds, there is a crash of static as a familiar silhouette appears on the screen, highlighted by shining red eyes.
“When the Levee Breaks” begins to echo throughout the arena as the audience responds with a combination of curious cheers and murmurs.
Zach Davis: And we’re live! It looks like the Internet Champion is here, Freddy!
Freddy Whoa: And this can only mean one thing, we’re about to find out something huge!
Blaze appears on the entrance ramp, a dark red trench coat over his shoulders and the Internet Championship displayed proudly over one shoulder. He holds it proudly over his head and points out to the crowd cryptically.
Freddy Whoa: That kind of looks like the pose he used to do as People’s Champion.
Blaze walks slowly down the ramp, the belt over his shoulder and smiles knowingly as a few fans reach out to touch the belt. He stops by the front row and high fives a fan leaning over the barricade, pushing him back in his seat in the process and drawing conflicted looks from the first row.
Finally though, he makes his way into the ring and grabs a microphone from a ringside attendant, shaking out his arm lazily as he raises the mouthpiece.
Teddy Blaze: How quickly things can turn around, ladies and gentlemen.
Two weeks ago, I was approached by Gemini Battle, our former world Champion.
Blaze’s emphasis on the word ‘former’ draws a smattering of boos as he smiles.
Teddy Blaze: You see, it was not that long ago that Mr. Gemini Battle saw fit to eliminate me from Ultimate Showdown, to sneak up behind me and snatch away my chance to leave as world champion. But what our distinguished Television Champion failed to recognize is that he did not send me away empty handed.
Blaze pats the Internet Championship now over his shoulder.
Teddy Blaze: Gemini Battle, in eliminating me in the cowardly fashion you did from Ultimate Showdown, you made me the emissary of the virtual world! The ambassador of the anonymous masses! You gave me control over the most powerful force in the world.
Say what you will about our methods, but you’d be harder pressed to find a more dedicated group of individuals than the men and women behind those screens. We erect shrines, we create legends, we tear down falsehoods and we proclaim truths! And we do it each and every day.
The keyboard is our sword and the mouse our dagger.
And with but a single stroke, a tap of our fingers, the world shudders.
Gemini Battle, do you realize yet the mountain you have to climb? When last we faced, I left you laying in the center of this ring, not sure what had happened, and it is only a matter of time before history repeats itself. I asked you to bring me the Television Title, and lo and behold you have done it.
You see ladies and gentlemen? I have taken the world Champion and I have turned him into an errand boy.
In this business, it is not the strongest that survive, not even the fastest. No, it is the smartest.
And anyone who holds this belt can attest that it takes far more brains than you’d ever get from a Television to hold it right.
The fans now begin to throw boos at the Internet Champion, and Blaze responds with a cocky grin.
Teddy Blaze: Am I wrong? Did Gemini Battle not play directly into my hands?
Do you even realize the gem you now carry, Mr. Battle? Or are you simply-
Blaze is cut off mid-sentence as “Duality” suddenly cries out from the speakers! Without any poses or taunting, Gemini is suddenly on the ramp, the furious look in his eyes saying more than words ever could.
Gemini Battle: Words are coming from your mouth but all I hear is a bunch of bullshit!
Freddy Whoa: Gemini does not look happy here! He’s coming to the ring!
Gemini keeps talking as he walks down the ramp and towards the ropes.
Gemini Battle: But what else would you expect from a giant ASSHOLE!
Gemini rolls through the ropes and stands up, marching right towards Blaze and staring him directly in the eye.
Gemini Battle: You think you can hypnotize these people? You think they can’t see through your façade? But most laughable of all… you think that you’re better than ME? Let me show you a little something.
Gemini throws down the microphone and begins to Advance on Blaze, but the Internet Champion extends an arm, holding him back momentarily.
Teddy Blaze: Mr. Battle, hold on! Did you not want to know the stipulations for WAR?
Gemini pauses, observing the champ angrily, but he pauses to allow him to continue. Blaze’s devilish grin returns as he holds out his hands to the crowd.
Teddy Blaze: Did we not want this match to be decided by the viewers? Did we not want to be the representative of the masses? I will show you Gemini, I will show you what the stakes are.
As Blaze speaks, he begins urging fans to jump over the barricade. The fans look at each other in confusion, but Blaze is vehemently insisting. A few brave fans begin to jump over the barricade as security rushes to stop them, but every time a guard tries to move forward, it creates an opening for someone new! Before long, the entire ringside area has become overwhelmed, and fans now completely surround the ring.
Zach Davis: Watch out! Hey, that’s my coffee cup!
Freddy Whoa: Watch the hair!
Gemini looks around in shock while Blaze begins laughing uncontrollably.
Teddy Blaze: Do you see, Gemini? Do you see how quickly we can throw this world into chaos?? At WAR, the first fall shall be decided by the masses around the world, as the fans completely surround the ring in the first ever WorldWide Lumberjack match! The second fall will be a cage match. You can choose a third… but you won’t make it that far.
Gemini has heard enough, and charges forward, trying to connect with a hard right hand, but Blaze throws himself from the ring, disappearing into the crowd while laughing into the microphone. Gemini looks at the chaos, but Blaze is gone, the mocking sound of his laughter echoing.
Gemini Battle: We are fighting to see who will become the King of All Media. We are breaking the fourth wall, we are including the internet trolls in our first stage, but what is media all about. Who has the most views? Whose ratings are SKY HIGH!?!? That’s why, the final stage, should it come to that, will have the crown of King of All Media hanging above us in the center of the ring and the only way to win will be to climb a ladder and retrieve that crown before your opponent. Yes, the final stage will be a SKY HIGH RATINGS LADDER MATCH.
The crowd cheers at the potential bedlam.
Gemini Battle: But you were right about something. It won’t come to that, because I’m going to DESTROY you before you can even begin to understand what happened.
Zach Davis: Battle wants that Internet Title. Teddy Blaze wants that Television Title. A deal was struck and these men find themselves pulling double duty at War as they compete in a 3 stages of Media Match to determine who will walk out of War as TV Champ, Internet Champ and King of All Media.
Freddy Whoa: A Lumberjack Match, a steel cage match, and a ladder match followed by a 40+ man battle royal. To say that these men are putting themselves at a severe disadvantage coming into this match is an understatement, but if anyone has proven that they can handle a situation like this it’s these two men.
Zach Davis: They certainly have. What a match that will be. What a night WAR will be!
‘Killed by Death’ hits the PA system.
Zach Davis: O man, things are about to heat up.
Zombie McMorris can be seen making is way towards the ring through the crowd.
Freddy Whoa: ZMAC also has a stake in this match.
ZMAC hops the barrier and grabs a microphone before rolling into the ring.
Zombie McMorris: What the fuck is all this that I see before me? It seems here like ya’ll two are tryin to cut ol’ Z out this picture before its been fully developed. I mean, its done great and all that you two are crying like two prissy bitches, going back and forth about what match type you want for this King of Media Bull-sheeit but everyone in the world knows that Zombie McMorris has been holding down that Internet strap for the majority of this year and there is no doubt in anyones mind that I should be in this match.
Gemini Battle: Yah, Z, that’s great and all but you are not in this match yet. In fact, you won’t be in this match ever because later on tonight, I’m going to beat you – like I always do -
Zombie McMorris: And suck my dick for five hours. Yah, I know, I saw the internet thread. You must be so damn proud of yourself. Truth of the matter is, G, you don’t know the difference from a dank meme to a skid mark. You are way out of your league.
Gemini Battle: And you’re out of your league. Do you know who I am; I am the former World Champion and you will respect me.
Zombie McMorris: I mean, yah. I would respect you, if’n I was capable of doing such things. But I ain’t. Face it, right now in the back is Bates gear bag and tired, alone and hungry. Maybe you should go tend to it and let the two faces of WCF do what they got to do. So while ya’ll be talkin’ about high ratings matches or fourth wall matches or matches where you sit around and suck dick, why don’t we actually have a fucking match. If’n you want gimmick hype, then you get gimmick hype.
Teddy Blaze: What are you talkin about, Z MAC?
Zombie McMorris: I am talking about the last stage. The final fall. You want that belt, Teo, you want to take that King of all Media moniker, then you better be ready to fucking end me. I’m talking one ring, one cage, one ladder. The cage is covered in barbed wire. You want to win, you better climb that shit and retrieve BOTH the TV and MY Internet title. So think that over, Teddy. Think about what you’re going to have to do to beat the Pale Rider, The Coked Up Mad Man.. and G, fuck you.
Zombie McMorris drops the mic and rolls out of the ring and heads back into the crowd as ‘Killed by Death’ hits the PA system again.
Freddy Whoa: WHOA, ZMAC just laid down one hell of a final stage. If ZMAC beats Gemini Battle later on tonight, WAR is shaping up to be one of the best Pay Per Views in recent memory!
Zach Davis: Let's get to the action!
Alex Winterz vs Jason O'Neal
Ding Ding Ding!
Kyle Steele: Ladies, and gentlemen! This match is scheduled for one fall!
'Lost in the Echos' by Linkin Park begins to play as Alex Winterz comes out from behind the curtain. He has a big smile on his face as he smiles right at the crowd. He begins to pat his right elbow pad before he starts to walk down the rampway giving high fives to the crowd.
Kyle Steel: Introducing first! Hailing from Rochester, New York! At six feet tall, weighing in at 225 pounds. He is Alex Winterz!
He gets into the ring and sits on the top turnbuckle just waiting for the bell to ring.
Zach Davis: Here’s Alex Winterz looking fired up tonight!
Freddy Whoa: Don't you mean he looks chilled up?
Zach Davis: What?
#1 by Nelly hits and Jason O'Neal walks arrogantly walks to the ring.
Kyle Steel: Introducing his opponent! Hailing from New Orleans, Louisiana! At six feet, two inches tall, weighing at 220 pounds. He is “The Real Deal” Jason O’Neal!
Zach Davis: Jason the Sensation wastes no time getting into the ring.
Freddy Whoa: He must not care about all the theatrics wrestlers entrances can be.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Alex Winterz and Jason O’Neal meet in the center and waste no time getting the action started.
BAM! BAM! BAM!
Both men exchange shots to the head and body. Neither man seems to have the advantage.
Zach Davis: Look at them go!
Freddy Whoa: They are beating the frak out of each other and we've just started!
Alex Winterz dodges a strike and hits the ropes.
Alex comes in for a clothesline but Jason counters with a backflip kick to the head taking Alex down.
Zach Davis: Nice counter by Jason!
Freddy Whoa: He definitely hit the mark!
Jason grabs Alex by the head and pulls him to his feet. Jason goes for a suplex.
Alex counters with a knee to the air after Jason lifts him. Jason drops Alex after the knee and is dazed.
Alex takes down Jason with a hurricanrana taking him off his feet.
Alex attacks the legs of Jason trying to weaken them.
Zach Davis: Alex trying to take the strike game out of Jason's playbook.
Freddy Whoa: Smart considering Jason incorporates MMA into his move set.
Alex waits for Jason to get to his feet.
Alex goes for his trademark running knee to end things early.
Jason side steps and hits the Sensation out of no where!
Zach Davis: Super kick! Jason just connected with his finish out of no where!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa did that just happen? Guess so cause Alex is out!
Jason makes the cover.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Kyle Steel: And your winner by pin fall… Jason “The Real Deal” O'Neal!
#1 hits the P.A. System as Jason celebrates.
Joe Smarts/Jaice Wilds/Bruno Armstrong vs Steven Singh/Jay West/El Fuego Del Infierno Eterno Silenciso
The chorus belts the first notes of "Power" by Kanye West and golden pyros form 5 ft high fountains across the stage. As the lyrics begin, The Superstar Steven Singh steps out to an enthusiastic rain of boos. He smiles smugly, nodding his head to the beat as part of portions of the crowd clap in beat. As West raps “I guess every superhero need his theme music,” The Golden One dusts off his shoulder, the pyro fountains lower until they disappear and Singh begins confidently striding down the ramp.
Zach Davis: Wait a second, looks like he's got company...
As Singh stops to jaw with a fan in the aisle, the crowd pops for Bruno "Iron" Armstrong stepping out from behind the curtain. He begins making his way down the ramp.
Freddy Whoa: I don't think Singh has noticed Armstrong yet but he's going to be none too happy when he does!
Zach Davis: Well he's got it coming since he interrupted Armstrong's entrance last week.
As Armstrong walks past Singh, he finally notices him. Singh grabs Armstrong by the shoulder, spinning him around. The Superstar steps close to Iron, angrily pointing his finger in his opponent's face. Armstrong is stone-faced and begins to turn back towards the ring when Superstar shoves him.
Freddy Whoa: Uh oh....
Armstrong smiles at Singh and steps towards him. Singh puts his hands up and backs off a bit so Armstrong smiles and begins to turn back to the ring again.
Zach Davis: Singh looking for a cheap shot right hand!
Freddy Whoa: NOPE! Blocked by Armstrong and answered with one of his own!
Armstrong gets the upper hand despite Singh trying to blindside him! Hard right hands by Bruno Armstrong in the aisle!
Zach Davis: We don't even have all our competitors in the ring yet!
Freddy Whoa: But it looks like we're about to!
The other four members of the match up come flying out of the back! First out is Jaice Wilds, also laying into Singh! But here comes Jay West mixing it up with him! And now Joe Smarts comes streaming out of the back followed quickly by El Fuego Del Infierno Eterno Silenciso!
Freddy Whoa: All hell is breaking loose out here! And all thanks to that so-called Superstar trying to take a cheap shot at Bruno Armstrong!
Zach Davis: Hey, Armstrong came out here trying to interrupt his entrance!
Freddy Whoa: Yeah, yeah, just like Superstar did to HIM last week! The referee is outside the ring, trying to regain some semblance of order...
Joe Smarts clotheslines EFDIES out of the ring. He, in turn, is Clotheslined out by Jay West. Jay West turns and gets a Dropkick from Jaice! Jaice then rushes Singh, who ducks and hits a Back Bodydrop, sending Jaice flying out. Finally, the bell can ring.
Zach Davis: Armstrong and Singh left alone as our legal men, and here we go!
Singh is still rocking from the entrance attack and this allows Armstrong to gain the upper hand. After a tie up he presses Singh into the ropes and then whips him across the ring. As Singh comes back Armstrong executes a Standing Dropkick. Singh gets back up and Armstrong hits a Wind Up Punch!, popping the crowd before going for a pin.
No!, Singh kicks out. Armstrong transitions into a Sleeper.
Freddy Whoa: Starting the wearing down process now.
Singh starts working his way to his feet. Jay West starts to rush into the ring and the ref yells at him to stop, giving Singh the opportunity to mule kick Armstrong right in the balls. West stops trying to get into the ring with the low blow complete and Singh goes for a pin now.
No!, shoulder up from Armstrong. Singh locks in a Chinlock now as the crowd comes alive.
Crowd: LET'S GO ARM-STRONG!
Crowd: STE-VEN SINGH!
Crowd: LET'S GO ARM-STRONG!
Crowd: STE-VEN SINGH!
The crowd's enthusiasm gives Armstrong the strength to get to his feet. He's able to take Singh down with a Russian Legsweep!
Zach Davis: We've had a lot of popular Armstrongs here in the WCF. Chelsea Armstrong, Seifer Black Armstrong... With War coming up, who knows who we'll see!
Freddy Whoa: Who cares, Zach? This rivalry between Steven Singh and Bruno Armstrong is what has captured WCF's attention right now!
Bruno is to his feet and he waits for Singh to get to his. Once Singh is up Bruno charges him.
Zach Davis: Spear!
NO!, Singh moves to the side and Bruno charges into his opponents' corner, hitting the ringpost shoulder first. Singh tags in Jay West, who jumps up onto the top and then does a Mushroom Stomp to the back of Bruno Armstrong!, crumpling him to the mat.
Freddy Whoa: DAMN! Broken in half!
West goes for the pin.
Zach Davis: That has to be it.
No!, Armstrong kicks out!
Freddy Whoa: What heart!
Jay West grabs Armstrong by the head and runs towards a neutral corner.
Zach Davis: SLICED BREAD #2!
NO!, Armstrong is able to toss West across the ring. West gets back up and rushes Armstrong, who kicks him in the gut and hits a vicious Brainbuster!
Freddy Whoa: PLANTED HIM! Oh my gosh!
Armstrong dives and tags in Joe Smarts! Smarts Springboards in and hits a Leg Drop onto West, and then goes for a pin.
No!, West kicks out.
Zach Davis: Let's hope he can be focused after playing Battlefield all week.
Joe Smarts backs up and waits for West to get to his feet. Once West is up he runs at him and hits a Running Elbow, knocking his head off!, and sending him into the corner. Smarts then grabs his head and executes a Tornado DDT before going for another pin.
NO!, broken up by El Fuego Del Infierno Eterno Silensio. West rolls out of the ring.
Freddy Whoa: Looks like El Fuego is legal, lucha rules!
El Fuego pulls Joe Smarts in and Powerbombs him! He goes for a pin.
No!, kickout by Smarts.
Zach Davis: Not sure what to expect from this madman.
He backs off and then runs at Smarts, executing a Hurricanrana. He keeps his momentum up and climbs to the top....
Freddy Whoa: SHOOTING STAR PRESS!
NO!, Smarts rolls away and tags in Jaice Wilds. Wilds measures up El Fuego and runs at him...
Zach Davis: Jumping Russian Legsweep!
Jaice gets back to his feet and measures up El Fuego before hitting a Disaster Kick! Pin attempt!
Shoulder up by El Fuego.
Freddy Whoa: We've got two short weeks until War, and these men are giving it their all.
Jaice Wilds tunes up the band and goes for his Xtreme Dream Superkick as El Fuego gets to his feet, but El Fuego ducks it and dumps Jaice out of the ring. Jaice lands on the apron however, and El Fuego rushes him. Jaice pulls the ropes down, sending El Fuego out. Jaice gets back in the ring and we're apparently going by lucha rules so El Fuego being out allows Singh to quickly enter the ring and roll Jaice up from behind!
Zach Davis: Oh come on! Jaice didn't even see him coming!
Steven Singh gets up and brushes dirt off his shoulder, grinning - only for Bruno Armstrong to spin him around from behind.
Freddy Whoa: IRON MAN BUSTER!
Armstrong looks down at Singh for a second before rolling out of the ring.
Zach Davis: Steven Singh may have won the match, but Bruno Armstrong just left him reeling!
Freddy Whoa: Will these two meet in the ring at War? Hell, they both looked impressive here tonight - do we have two darkhorse candidates on our hands?
Armstrong disappears to the back as Singh starts to get up, seething with anger.
We cut to the backstage area just outside of the office of Seth Lerch, who had just taken back control of his company this week after being released early from rehab. Waiting outside of Seth's office is Skittlez, who looks both hyped up and nervous at the same time. The scrawny white rapper is pacing back and forth in front of the office, throwing out some sick freestyle raps, perhaps to calm his nerves.
Skittlez: It's finally bout time dat I shine, this moment is mine. Done waitin' at back of the line. Two Slams and a pay per view, they can't take that away from you. Been held at the bottom, but now gotta face the truth. Contract on the wings, bout to step into the ring, on the regular, this opportunity sings. Sarah wouldn't sign me to a deal, but Seth will, now I'm pacin' and waitin', holdin' my breath still.
He continues to rap as he waits.
Zach Davis: Skittlez, nervously waiting for Seth Lerch to exit his office. Despite being originally teamed with Lilith for the amusement of former general manager, Sarah Twilight, Skittlez has earned himself some respect and a level of support in the back. After weeks of trying to prove himself, it seems that the underdog is finally going to get himself a contract for the main roster of WCF ... and just in time for War.
Freddy Whoa: If you'd have asked me just over a month ago if we'd ever see Skittlez on Slam ... or Revenge ... AND actually win a match, I'd have laughed. And I mean don't get me wrong, dude has a long way to go, but he has heart. That is why he has earned that main roster contract. Proud moment for him for sure.
Skittlez: Nothin' more than this war that is comin' to my door, a moment I am ready for. It's bout to get ...
His rap is cut short as the door to Seth's office opens and Seth Lerch emerges ... he is a bt surprised to see Skittlez waiting there for him, but nonetheless greets him.
Seth Lerch: Uh ... is there something I can help you with?
Skittlez adjusts his jorts and his backwards baseball cap and postures himself with pride as he looks at the boss.
Skittlez: Yo, so you told me I could be up in War an' shit. Like, I was gon' get a contract finally. So I been waitin' all night fo' this opportunity. I won' let you down boss man.
Seth sighs a bit as he had a LOT of things to catch up with after being gone for about a month. But yes, Skittlez had been offered a contract and the opportunity to participate in War. Seth nods, a bit reluctantly.
Seth Lerch: Alright hold on.
Seth goes back into his office and emerges a few moments later with some paperwork.
Seth Lerch: Look, you still have a long way to go around here. And personally, I'd rather keep you where you are. But you somehow ... oddly enough have sold some merchandise so I'll give you a short term contract for now, and we'll see how you do with that. So ... I suppose I will deal with it. Just sign the contract and you're on a six month probationary term.
Skittlez is completely excited. The contract was a small one, and wasn't for much more money than he'd been making working as enhancement talent ... but it was a contract. He takes the paperwork and the pen, completely overcome with joy.
Skittlez: Yo, you won't regret this. Man I can't believe it. Imma be a real star!
Skittlez is about to sign his name to the papers when suddenly WHAM!!!!
He is BLASTED with a boot to the skull that DRIVES his head into the concrete wall beside him with a sickened CRACK as out of NOWHERE Sarah Twilight comes into frame.
Zach Davis: Oh my God! Somebody get help!
Seth jumps back, startled ... but doesn't do anything to intervene. Sarah hauls Skittlez to his feet and runs him head first right back into the wall .... CRRRRACCCCKKKK! His skull again connects with the concrete wall. There is blood everywhere and Skittlez is clearly unconscious at this point.
Freddy Whoa: Why? What reason is there for this? Sarah Twilight is a sick ... heartless human being.
Zach Davis: The man just wanted a chance like anyone else. He might be seriously hurt here. Seth needs to put a stop to this.
Seth however remained indifferent. One of his biggest stars assaulting one of his least important stars was not really going to affect him in any way ... and it saved him a six month contract. Skittlez is slumps against the wall and Sarah just looks at Seth and snickers with a sick, evil laughter. Seth watches on, but again does nothing to stop the assault as Sarah now drags the unconscious rapper from the wall and wraps him up into her Spellbound submission hold.
Zach Davis: Come on! The kid is knocked out cold. There is no need for any of this!
Freddy Whoa: This is the kind of crap that Sarah Twilight is known for ... sickening assaults without any provocation. Somebody needs to get help back there NOW! I am ... just floored that Seth isn't lifting a finger to stop this.
Skittlez is shot back into consciousness by the searing pain of having his arms and neck contorted extremely in ways they were never meant to go. Sarah pushes upwards on his arms with complete MALICE until finally there is one loud POP, followed by another and yet another. Skittlez' screams are deafening when Sarah finally releases the hold. She had either broken his arms, or dislocated both of his shoulders ... and possibly broken his neck with the force that was applied. The rapper is crying out and screaming so loudly that Seth is actually cringing at how bad it really is. His forehead is split open straight down to his eyebrows with a HUGE gash with blood pouring out. His face is a crimson mask and his white tank top is COVERED with blood and stained red as far down as his stomach. His head leans to one side very awkwardly and both of his arms are just flopped at his side, he is unable to move them at all. The unnatural bulges where his shoulder and neck would normally line up clearly indicate massive damage.
Freddy Whoa: DO SOMETHING SETH! Look at this kid, he might have nis damn neck broken! How is this okay? I don't give a crap what kind of draw Twilight is ... this is bullshit!
Zach Davis: There is a reason that Sarah Twilight was fired back in 2014 ... and this is the reason. The devestation and damage she causes at will are just .... sickening. But Seth did not then, and will not now take action against her. It took the board of directors mandating that she be removed from the roster to actually make it happen. This woman thrives on carnage ... she lives to create the misery and suffering of others. The fact that she once again holds a place on the WCF roster makes me fear for the safety of everyone in the back.
Freddy Whoa: And out here ... I'm not stupid. I know why I got called up to commentate with you, it's because she decimated Shannan Lerch. This woman is unstable, and a ticking time bomb at all times. Her being here is a danger to everyone.
Sarah looks down at her handiwork with a simpering smile before glancing back at Seth, who was still in shock over the entire ordeal.
Sarah Twilight: And THAT ... is how you fucking handle things.
She reaches down, picking up the contract that was meant for Skittlez and roughly shoves it into Seth's chest.
Sarah Twilight: You're welcome.
As paramedics swarm the area to tend to Skittlez, Sarah sends one final snap kick right to his face, hitting him in the mouth. He coughs out some blood and spts a few teeth onto the floor as Sarah swaggers away from the scene down the hall. Seth stands there for a long moment, staring as she leaves ... in complete disbelief. Medics load a still screaming Skittlez onto a stretcher and try to stabalize him. Seth exhales heavily, shaking his head and walks off, dumping the contract into the trash.
Zach Davis: I ... I don't even have words.
Freddy Whoa: That's it? She nearly killed a man ... and nothing happens?
Zach Davis: Butcher last week ... Oblivion .... need I say more?
Freddy Whoa: Why do I still work here? *sigh*
Doc Henry vs Adam Young vs Oblivion
Zach Davis: Our next match had people talking.
Freddy Whoa: Doc Henry had been calling The Monster Fauxblivion.
Zach Davis: Meaning as if The Monster has not been IT's original nasty evil self.
Freddy Whoa: Don't think that was a wise move, considering this IS a triple threat HARDCORE match.
Zach Davis: A speciality in Oblivion's repertoire.
Freddy Whoa: This will NOT be pretty. This WILL be gruesome!!!
Zach Davis: Oblivion... Doc Henry... Adam Young... Triple threat hardcore match... NEEEEEXT!
The house lights lower down to one single white light hitting the entrance.
Southern accent voice: He walks in the valley of shadow and death, yet he fears neithers
"Power trip" by Monster Magnet starts playing and the single white light begins to flicker through the smoke, filling up the entrance. The jumbotron lights up with waving American flag and the words "Revenge" written over it. Out steps Adam Young in his red, white, and blue camo pants, black combat boots, black "Common Folk" tee shirt and black zipper hoodie over his head, begins walking towards the ring with his famous icy stare towards the ring.
Kyle Steel: From the great state of Texas... Weighing in at 240 pounds... Redneck... Adam... Yooouuung!!!
The fans: ONE SICK BASTARD!!
Young arrives at the ring and circles it before climbing up in the ring apron, where he wipes his feet before climbing into the ring. Young walks to the center, of the ring and throws his arms wide open, before taking the hooded jacket off and handing it to Myra.
Zach Davis: Adam Young looks ready for action!!
Dr. Feel-good by Mötley Crüe hits the speakers and as the main riff blasts through the arena, Doc and Master Ryushi emerge on the stage, looking around, he moves his fists in the air, the crowd cheering wildly as he then leads the way to the ring. Climbing up to the steps, he hops the turnbuckle and "gets loose" while waiting for his opponent.
Freddy Whoa: We have two out of three competitors already in the ring.
Zach Davis: All we need is Oblivion!!
Freddy Whoa: Good God, did we just say that!?
Zach Davis: All we need is Oblivion!!
The house lights go out and the crowd goes into a frenzy. The lighter lights come on. "Click click boom" by Saliva begins to play.The arena rattles as golden pyrotechnics criss-cross, on the entrance stage.
Kyle Steel: From Euphoria... Weighing in at 325 pounds... He is The God of Enlightenment... Ooooobliiiiviiiiooon!!!
On these Saturdays when kids go out and play
You I was up in my room let the blaze...
Make it... Break it... Take it...
Until I'm overrated!!
CLICK CLICK BOOM!!
Oblivion struts and bounces down the entrance ramp, with IT's arms out. Oblivion bounces, twirling while having his arms out, before snarling and barking at the camera. Oblivion walks around the ring gets to the commentary table, slamming IT's massive mitts on the table roaring at Zach Davis and Freddy Whoa. Oblivion grabs for loose chairs and proceeds to throw multiple chairs into the ring.
Zach Davis: The Monster Oblivion is already... ALREADY gone nuts!! Throwing chairs into the ring!!!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA!! This match is underway!! Doc Henry and Adam Young are smashing their brains out with chairs!!
Zach Davis: Oblivion is pulling out ladders and tables!!
Crowd: Obi!! Obi!! Obi!! Obi!!
Oblivion turns around and rips off the covering off the commentary table.
Freddy Whoa: I think we better move out if the way!!
Zach Davis: Better to be save than sorry.
Inside the ring, both Doc Henry and Adam Young have smacked each other bloody.
Freddy Whoa: Adam Young drops the chair...
Zach Davis: Double undertook implant ddt!!
Young picks up Doc Henry, blood dripping everywhere.
Freddy Whoa: Doc Henry spit his own blood into the eyes of Adam Young.
Zach Davis: PEDIGREE!!
Freddy Whoa: Both men are down!! Oh no!!
Oblivion has removed the monitors from the commentary table and turned around, noticing that both Doc Henry and Adam Young are on the mat, motionless. The Monster grins from ear to ear, practically drooling. He looks under the ring then picks up IT's head with a strand of barbed wire. The crowd of absolutely crazy.
Zach Davis: Oblivion has barbed wire and the other two are already bleeding!!
Oblivion slides into the ring, unraveling the barbed wire, walking towards Adam Young. The Monster picks up Young wrapping the barbed wire around his head and neck...
Zach Davis: OH MY GOD!!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa!!
Zach Davis: SOULTAKER!!!!
Oblivion walks over to Doc Henry takes some barbed wired wrap a chair....
Freddy Whoa: DIRTNAP ON A CHAIR!!
Zach Davis: Stanley Moser slides in looks at The Monster.
Freddy Whoa: WHOA!!! What is The Monster doing?!
Oblivion takes Adam Young and places Doc Henry on top of him and Oblivion proceeds to make the pin...
Kyle Steel: The winner of the match... The Monster Oblivion!!
Steven Singh Segment
Backstage, we see Superstar Steven Singh barging into Seth Lerch's office.
Steven Singh: Lerch! Did you see that mongoloid mook interrupt MY entrance? What the hell kind of two bit rodeo is this?! People just come out whenever they feel like it?
Seth Lerch: Didn't you do that to him last week?
Steven Singh: Yeah because he's using MY music! Which I assumed you'd have put a stop to by now but obviously not! You don't even return calls on the subject!
Seth Lerch: That's because it's a stupid subject and it doesn't matter, just use different theme music. I've got bigger fish to fry.
Steven Singh: I will do no such thing! And you need to be frying this fish! HE should have to change his theme music!
Seth Lerch: Jesus, children. FINE, I'll tell you what. You two idiots can settle this at the Slam after War in a loser-changes-theme match. Happy?
Steven Singh: He should have to change it on account of being wildly undeserving and mind-numbingly mediocre...but fine. I'll take this GOLDEN opportunity to tap him out and show him what 'Power' really means.
Seth Lerch: Yeah, great, whatever. Get the hell out of my office. And don't ever barge in here like that again.
Jordan Ciserano vs Serujah
Zach Davis: WELCOME BACK TO SLAM FOLKS THE GETAWAY SHOW BEFORE WAR!
"Encore" by Jackyll his the speakers.
Freddy Whoa: HERE SHE COMES..Maybe Literally!
Kyle Steel: THIS MATCH IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL..INTRODUCING FIRST..THE HEBREW HAMMER..SERUJAH GOLDSTEIN!!!!
Serujah comes out wearing nearly nothing but boots..It seems a piece of strategically placed floss is the only thing keeping her from being completely nude..She struts out, goes to a fan alongside the ramp and puts his head in her chest ..She lets him go and then proceeds to the ring, strutting and, smiling..she climbs the apron and starts doing a bit of a pole dance with the ring post, then she goes to the other side of the ring, slowly bending all the way over, smiling into the camera, and entering the ring..She touches herself provocatively and appears to enjoy it...
Zach Davis: Not what I had in mind..both with the name The Hebrew Hammer..and her history with Freezer Burn..
Freddy Whoa: Jesus..I feel like I should be tipping her or something...
Kyle Steel: AND HER OPPONENT..WEIGHING IN AT 185 LBS...JORDAN CISERANO!
"Back in the Picture" by The Rasmus plays and the crowd cheers. Three seconds into the song Jordan Ciserano comes out jumping, high with energy. He continues to pump the crowd up. After that the pyro begins, exploding every time one of Ciserano's jumps hits the floor. Ciserano makes his way down the aisle high-fiving any and every fan in sight. Once he makes it to the base of the ring he jumps onto the apron while pyro explodes as he hits it. He enters by spring boarding over the top rope. Following that he climbs the top turnbuckle to the top rope hold his hands over his head. The music ends and he's ready to fight ..Serujah watches, obviously turned on, biting her lip.
Zach Davis: Well..it looks like Serujah likes what she sees here...And theres the bell!
Ciserano stands in place, looking confused...Serujah starts to crawl across the ring towards him, slowly, seductively..She reaches his leg and uses it to climb up his body..Her hands run all over his body..then she kisses him, wrapping her legs around him.
Freddy Whoa: WOAH!
Ciserano, ever the gentlemen, pulls away and sets her on the top turnbuckle...He wipes his mouth in disgust as he backs away...Serujah, angry that he has spurned her, leaps from the turnbuckle.
Zach Davis: CROSS BODY! COVER!
..Kickout by Ciserano! Now Serujah back on the attack...straddling Ciserano...And Grinding him hard!
Freddy Whoa: Is this some kind of submission maneuver? Genius!
Ciserano fights her off and in his rage turns her inside out with a clothesline
Zach Davis: OH MY GOD! Its very few people that Ciserano can over power, but at 92 lbs..Serujah is one of them!
Serujah looks up, wipes her mouth, and gives Jordan a smile..She stands up..Tells him to "Bring it Baby!" Ciserano bitch slaps her.."Harder" She says...He hits her again...a trickle of blood comes from her mouth..Another smile...She wipes the blood on her finger and deep throats it...Ciserano turns red as she takes the finger and runs it down his chest..Then, quickly, she jumps..
Zach Davis: WOAH! DDT! OUT OF NOWHERE! Ciserano gets Planted! Now Serujah goes to the top...Moonsault..NO! Ciserano recovered quickly and caught her...wait..What is she doing...
By virtue of how she was caught, Serujah's head is right at Ciseranos...um..Groin level...
Zach Davis: Wait..turn the camera's...Turn the cameras!
Luckily for WCF's production team, Ciserano body slams her before she can unwrap his package..Ciserano still not sure how to handle this...Shakes his head and picks her up, whipping her into the turnbuckle..She hits hard..He charges...She Moves! Ciserano misses the splash and Serujah rolls him up.
Zach Davis: 1
NO! Ciserano can't seem to get into a rhythm here!
But it appears he's had enough!
Jordan kips up and catches Serujah flush with a drop kick...she kips up again...dropkick...Ciserano on the attack..Comes off the ropes..Hits Rolling Thunder! Hooks the leg..
Zach Davis: 1
NO! Serujah kicks out and now..Ciserano...Picking up Serujah...Rear grapple..
Freddy Whoa: Oh My God! Serujah is twerking! Look at that ass work! Jordan getting a damn lap dance!
Zach Davis: Ciserano still has the grapple but Serujah is on all fours twerking like a Hip Hop Star Video...
Ciserano snaps out of the brief enchantment with her and fires off a German Suplex sending Serujah halfway across the ring.
Zach Davis: He's going over there again..another rear grapple..think he'd learn his lesson..going for another German...Serujah fighting..looking to break out of it..Moving Jordans hands to..her breasts!
Freddy Whoa: This broad does not let up!
Zach Davis: Serujah breaks out..AND SMACKS CISERANO IN THE FACE!
Serujah has turned, now yelling at Jordan for disrespecting her body..she lands a series of right hands...Goes off the far ropes..His a spinning heel kick sending Ciserano down..Then she hits a standing moonsault...Cover..
Zach Davis: 1
Thr..no! No! Jordan got the shoulder up!
Freddy Whoa: This has got to be one of the most interesting matches I've ever called..
Serujah climbs the turnbuckle...Ciserano recovers and leaps to the turnbuckle...He attempts to hook her for a superplex but she blocks it....Tires to hook her but theres almost nothing to grab but bare skin...Serujah uses open palm thrusts to the chest then beats on his face with her fists...He stands groggy on the second turnbuckle...Then Serujah climbs to the top, leaps over Jordan..
Zach Davis: SUNSET FLIP POWERBOMB OFF THE TOP! LEGS HOOKED!
NO!!!! Amazing Move by Serujah!
Serujah gets Ciserano to his feet and whips him into the corner, running to the opposite corner..the fans start to cheer..they can imagine whats coming...Serujah runs full speed...
Zach Davis: BRONCO BUSTER! ONLY THIS IS A FULL FACIAL BRONCO BUSTER!
Freddy Whoa: If I were Jordan, I'd get blood work after this..Just to be safe...
Zach Davis: The referee has to Administer a standing 4 count...Shes not stopping!
Serujah looks to be getting off on this..The ref pulls her away...Serujah yells at the referee..."I WAS ALMOST THERE! WHAT THE FUCK!" Meanwhile, Jordan has gotten up, wiping his face...Disgusted...Jordan looks angry...While Serujah Argues with the ref...Ciserano sets up for...
Zach Davis: SUPERKICK!!!!!!
Ciserano drops down and pins.
Freddy Whoa: Another win for Jordan Ciserano!
Ciserano gets up and begins to celebrate.
Zach Davis: Not too long ago, Jordan Ciserano defeated Brent Alpine, a man fighting for the WCF World Title. He could be yet another dark horse candidate to win War, guys. He's on a roll.
Beat the Clock Challenge
Lilith vs Crazy J vs Cliff of Doom vs Teddy Blaze
Zach Davis: Our next should be a good one. We have the first of the two beat the clock challenges tonight…
Freddy Whoa: Indeed we do Zach. Teddy Blaze will face off against WCF newcomer, Cliff of Doom, Hardcore Champion, Crazy J… and WCFs self proclaimed second greatest fighter of all time… Lilith in a fatal four way match.
Zach Davis: No doubt this one will go down in history as a classic. Lets head over to ring announcer, Zyle Steel, for the introductions.
The house lights go down as colorful lights start flashing all around the area. "Imaginary" by Evanescence begins to play, as Lilith appears at the top of the entrance ramp. She is wearing a colorful miniskirt, leggings, an extremely tight low cut tank top and black leather heeled ankle boots. Lilith proceeds to skips down to the ring holding a teddy bear in her hand as the crowd give cheer quite loudly for the crazed brunette.
Kyle Steel: From Los Angeles, California… weighing in at 152 pounds.... she is LILITH!!!
Lilith then skips around the outside of the ring and locates a young fan sitting ring side passing them her teddy bear. Lilith smiles brightly at the crowd as she bounces up onto the ring apron, waving and blowing kisses to them all. She climbs through the ropes still smiling and pointing to a few of her fans as she waits for her opponents.
Zach Davis: Lilith looking quite pumped up here tonight…
Freddy Whoa: Yes, indeed. Rumor has it Lilith has found herself a new girlfriend, so unfortunately for all our eligible bachelors out there she is apparently off the market…
Zach Davis: Well, lets hope this will have put her in a new mindset tonight, things didn’t exactly go to plan for her last week…
Freddy: We can only hope, Freddy…
The arena goes dark. James Hetfield finger picks over the sound of strings and wind instruments. When the rest of the band kicks in, a spotlight shines on Cliff of Doom, who is at the top of the aisle posing with his arms stretched, fists clenched, and his head thrown back while he lets out a yell.
Kyle Steel: From Selden, New York… weighing in at 190 pounds… he is CLIFF OF DOOM!!!
Cliff walks down to the ring. At the end of the first verse, the song cuts to the guitar solo, by which point Cliff climbs on to the second rope and repeats the same pose from before.
Zach Davis: Cliff looks quite confident…
Freddy Whoa: It would certainly seem that way… lets hope he can maintain this composure!
The arena lights go out and a strobe light goes off over the entrance area. As Mutant X by Twiztid starts and Crazy J steps out wearing a ZT freekshow jersey and explosions go off on both sides and green lights shine down as smog comes from the ring post…
Kyle Steel: From Detroit, Michigan… weighing in at 325 pounds… he is CRAZY J!!!
When the smog clears Crazy J is rocking back and forth in the center of the ring like a crazy man… he then stands up and removes his jersey and is ready to battle.
Freddy Whoa: Whoa check out the look Lilith is currently giving him!
Zach Davis: Well are you surprised? The things this man has been saying about the poor girl lately have been downright distasteful. I hope Lilith kicks his ass…
Freddy Whoa: Whoa!!!
The Crowd explodes as a pounding drum beat echoes throughout the arena, signalling the arrive of Teddy Blaze! The lights drop, enveloping the arena in darkness as they turn towards the entrance ramp.
Kyle Steel: From Houston, Texas… weighing in at 188 pounds… he is TEDDY BLAZE!!!
With a crescendo and a burst of flame, Blaze appears before them, holding his hands out over his head and bathing in the applause. He takes a deep bow and walks towards the ring, waving to the fans along the way. He wears an almost cocky grin as he rolls between the ropes, offering his opponent an extended handshake before shrugging and walking to the turnbuckle.
He holds his arms over his head and yells out "WCF Forever!" as he does so, eliciting a cheer from the audience as the music reaches its zenith. He turns and steps back into the ring, waiting for the bell.
DING… DING… DING!!!
Freddy Whoa: And this thing is under way! Cliff of Doom and Teddy Blaze already going at it in the corner of the ring! Check out those hard left and rights Teddy is unleashing on Cliff! The power behind them is unreal!
Zach Davis: Lilith and Crazy J are just standing there, seemingly carefully observing each other… maybe Lilith has found a new confidence within the ring tonight… she looks like shes about to explode!
Freddy Whoa: Wha--- what happened?! Lilith just threw herself down onto the canvas… I don’t get it?
Zach Davis: So much for what I just said a second ago… this is weird… even for her. What is she thinking?
Freddy Whoa: Teddy Blaze and Cliff of Doom have taken a short break from trying to destroy each other and are checking out what has happened…
Zach Davis: Yeah, I don’t get this at all. Did she? Did she just tell someone to pin her?! What is going on?!!
Freddy Whoa: All three of her opponents just shook their heads, if Lilith doesn’t want to be in this match she better do something soon or she’s going to get hurt!
Back in the ring all three opponents are still checking out the downed Lilith not really sure what to do as Crazy J blindsides Cliff and Teddy Blaze, taking them both down with a double clothesline.
Zach Davis: What a jerk! Come on!
Crazy J turns to Lilith and he doesn’t want to hit her, Lilith is still lying on the canvas just waiting for him to pin her so she can leave as Cell Block runs out and throws him a black bag and J pulls out a strap on dildo and he looks at cell block and he point at Lilith. Crazy J goes into the corner and he starts putting the strap on her she is fighting and trying to push the big man off of her. Crazy J gets it on and kicks Lilith right in the crotch and she returns the favor and J bends over and he laughs for a second and Grabs Lilith and he throws her into the corner and he kicks her right in the face. Crazy J walks over to her.
Crazy J: My mom said never to hit someone that didn’t have a dick… sorry you got a dick now
Zach Davis: What did he just say to her?! Oh my god!
Freddy Whoa: Unbelievable.
Back in the ring whilst Crazy J was distracted by Lilith, Cliff regains his composure and runs over to Crazy J going for a roll up…
Zach Davis: Nope! Crazy J kicked out! Nice try by the rookie though, I have to give that to him. He could have won right there!
Freddy Whoa: Crazy J is immediately back up onto his feet but Teddy Blaze comes out of no where with a drop kick, sending the Hardcore Champion crashing straight back down onto the canvas!
Zach Davis: Never a good idea to turn your back on the Internet Champion! That guy is like a cat!
Freddy Whoa: Teddy Blaze irish whips Cliff into the ropes and follows it up with a strong elbow to the face knocking the newcomer down!
Zach Davis: Lilith is finally back up onto her feet and she looks absolutely furious and I can not blame her! She grabs the dildo Crazy J put onto her a moment ago and is… OH MY GOD!!! Lilith is beating the hell out of Crazy J with it!
Freddy Whoa: Surely that is illegal?!
Zach Davis: Apparently not!
Freddy Whoa: Lilith now climbing on top of Crazy J and is unleashing left and rights onto his face, just slashing her claws across the Hardcore Champions face!
Zach Davis: Someone has to stop this, this is going to turn nasty fast!
Freddy Whoa: At the other end of the ring, Teddy Blaze has just hit a tornado DDT on Cliff of Doom and has immediately covered him… Lilith isn’t even aware of this…
Zach Davis: Lilith breaks up the pin and is going after Teddy!
Freddy Whoa: She hits a hard back drop on the Internet Champion!
Zach Davis: Cliff and Crazy J are shaking off the cobwebs ready to get back into this. Crazy J once again goes after Lilith and hits her hard over the head…
Freddy Whoa: Yeah that looked painful! I wouldn’t be at all surprised if she was knocked out after that one… that man is dangerous!
Zach Davis: Cliff rushes Crazy J and begins to send a few hard right hands into his gut as Teddy Blaze quickly goes over to cover the still downed Lilith…
Freddy Whoa: No! This time Cliff breaks it up! Teddy does not look too happy about this as he has got straight into Cliffs face.
Zach Davis: These two look about ready to murder each other…
Freddy Whoa: Crazy J is back up onto his feet and looks like he is squaring up Cliff of Doom…
Zach Davis: No!!! Lilith out of no where with a spear!!! Lilith and Crazy J both go down hard onto the mat and Lilith is immediately on top of him once again sending hard lefts and rights into his face…
Freddy Whoa: Crazy J blocks one of Liliths shots and sends a hard headbutt into Liliths forehead… the brunette stumbling backwards and falling out of the ring!
Zach Davis: And it is down to three! Crazy J… Teddy Blaze… and Cliff of Doom! All three men back up onto their feet… all three men just waiting for someone to make a move! This could go any way here tonight… what is the clock at?
Freddy Whoa: Right now we’re at 5 minutes and 23 seconds… Lilith is still out of the ring trying to pull herself together. That headbutt was nasty!
Cliff of Doom runs at Crazy J and Clotheslines him out, only to be rolled up from behind by Teddy Blaze.
NO!, Cliff of Doom kicks out. The two are to their feet and Teddy hurriedly runs at Cliff, but Cliff is able to kick him in the gut...
Zach Davis: DOOMSTONE!
Cliff drops and pins Teddy!
Freddy Whoa: NO! TEDDY KICKS OUT!
Lilith quickly enters the ring and pulls Teddy in, rolling her new friend up from behind now!
Zach Davis: NO!, Teddy escapes that!
After escaping two nearfall attempts Teddy gets to his feet and tosses Lilith out of the ring. Cliff of Doom charges him next and is also tossed out of the ring. All of a sudden, the Jumbotron comes alive.
Freddy Whoa: What is this?
"THE FOLLOWING MESSAGE HAS BEEN PAID FOR BY THE FRIENDS OF GEMINI BATTLE"
Zach Davis: Oh no...
"Teddy Blaze... IS A LIAR!"
Some random shot of Teddy Blaze is shown where he looks awful, but the image is twisted and red, making him look even worse.
"He WANTS you to think he was a man of the people.... but if he was a PERSON.... would he hide behind A MASK!?"
Footage of Teo Del Sol is shown.
"Currently, he fancies himself a Champion of the Internet. However, this is what Teddy Blaze doesn't want you to know. He still has... AN AOL EMAIL ACCOUNT!"
Footage of an old, confused looking man wearing a Teo Del Sol match on a computer is shown. The computer screen blinks with an evil red bug virus icon.
"Furthermore, WikiLeaks has concluded that Teddy Blaze's Internet History had NO pornographic material whatsoever. A Champion of the Internet!?"
The tron shows a porn star for no real reason.
"And now, this man wants to be the Television Champion. Teddy Blaze is on record as saying that his favorite Married with Children character is Seven, his favorite Office boss is Andy, his favorite X-Files team was Doggett and Reyes, his favorite season of Roseanne is the one that was just a dream, and his favorite Simpsons season is whatever the current one is! AND HE IS THE ONE THAT CANCELLED FIREFLY!"
The fans in the arena have an emotional response and begin to boo.
"So, at War, don't Jump the Shark."
Footage of The Fonz jumping a shark is shown.
"Let Gemini Battle be your King of Media."
Gemini Battle is shown on screen.
Gemini Battle: I'm Gemini Battle, and I approve this message.
We go back to the arena. Teddy Blaze is livid as he stares at the video - and is rollen up from behind by Cliff of Doom!
Freddy Whoa: CLIFF OF DOOM WINS IT!
The bell sounds.
Zach Davis: Last year was the night of Wolf... could this War be the night of Cliff!?
Freddy Whoa: AWOOOO!
Cliff gets up and begins to celebrate.
Zach Davis: And what does this mean for the King of Media match!?
Freddy Whoa: That video took up a LOT of time! And really got under Teddy Blaze's skin. Do you think any of it was true?
Zach Davis: I surely hope not.
Freddy Whoa: Speaking of the King of Media match, what about the Cinema Champion, John Gable? Do you think he'll be coming back to WCF any time soon-
Zach Davis: LALALALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!
Jeff Purse/Cormack MacNeill vs The New Breed
"Survival" by Eminem blares on the PA.
Zach Davis: He's baaacckkk!
"This is survival of the fittest
This is do or die
This is the winner takes it all
So take it all"
A pyro goes off and up through the stage in Rey Mysterio fashion, Jeff Purse comes flying. Kari comes out from the back as Jeff walks down the aisles, pandering to the crowd.
"Wasn't ready to be no millionaire, I was ill-prepared
I was prepared to be ill though, the skill was there
From the beginning, it wasn't 'bout the ends"
Upon entering the ring, he throws his hands up in the middle of the ring, corner pyros of red and green shoot out. He takes off his aviator sunglasses and throws them in the audience. He turns and sits up on the turnbuckle, waiting for his teammate.
Kyle Steel: Introducing ....Fighting out of Halifax, Nova Scotia...weighing in at 275lbs...Cormack MacNeill!
The drone of the pipes fills the air as MacNeill slowly walks out onto the entrance ramp. He stops and looks around at the raucous cheering crowd. He takes a moment and raises his fist in salute.
Freddy Whoa: Cormack MacNeill is back too! Everyone is ready for War!
As the drums kick in, MacNeill walks slowly down to the ring, stopping at the end of the ramp to eye the ring before climbing up and sliding into the ring. He takes up a position in his corner and uses the ropes to stretch out and warm up.
Voice: Welcome to the New World Order, the New Breed!
"Cult of Personality" by Living Colour starts playing as the New Breed logo pops on the WCFtron. Out walks the New Breed all with pit bulls on chain leashes in black New Breed t-shirts. They walk towards the ring followed by Myra and Papa Young. They just stare into the ring showing no emotions at all. They hand the dogs over to Myra and climb up on the ring apron wiping their feet before climbing into the ring. They walk straight to the center and take their t-shirts off throwing them into the crowd.
Zach Davis: And these guys aren't "back" but they're here!
Before the bell rings The Calgary Storm charges Purse as The English Nightmare charges Cormack. The New Breed goes to whip them to the opposite end of the ring but the returning stars reverse it and send the New Breed flying out!
Freddy Whoa: Jeff Purse and Cormack MacNeill standing tall!
Purse gets onto the apron as Cormack yells for someone to get back into the ring. Wayne Gagne is the first to do so and Cormack runs right into a Dropkick from him. Cormack gets back to his feet and Gagne goes for a quick Superkick but Cormack ducks away from it and as they turn Cormack hits a Running Knee Lift. Gagne goes down and Cormack mounts him and begins punching him.
Zach Davis: Cormack MacNeill reminds me a lot of the Scoutmaster, Stuart Slane. A longtime WCF veteran who had never quite seen the success we know he is capable of. Stuart Slane was able to climb the mountain and win the greatest prize.. Will Cormack be here to claim War?
Eventually Cormack rolls off and Gagne stumbles to his feet. Cormack executes a Vertical Suplex and stalls as he has him up.
Freddy Whoa: WHOA! What a drop!
Cormack floats over and goes for a pin.
No!, broken up by Lennon.
Zach Davis: Lennon drops Cormack with a vicious European Uppercut before pulling Gagne to the corner. Lennon gets onto the apron, takes the tag, gets right back in. He grabs Cormack and does a Twisting Wristlock and before he can go for his DDT, Cormack shoves him off and sends him to the ropes. As he comes back Cormack executes a Powerslam!, into the pin.
No!, Lennon kicks out.
Freddy Whoa: This is an Adam Young lead tag team. Cormack is doing well so far but Adam Young is a WCF legend and these guys are no joke.
Cormack lifts Lennon up and throws him to the ropes. As he comes back Cormack lifts him up into a Bearhug. This brings Gagne back into the ring to break it up but Cormack runs towards Gagne - using Lennon as a battering ram, smashing them in between the turnbuckle!
Zach Davis: Damn!
Gagne rolls out and Cormack throws Lennon off and into the ropes. As he comes back he executes the Stone of Kings!, and pins him!
Freddy Whoa: That's all she wrote, folks!
The bell sounds.
Zach Davis: Cormack MacNeill wins as he returns to the WCF!
Jeff Purse enters the ring and he raises his arms high, stepping in front of Cormack MacNeill. He yells towards the fans, trying to get them to chant PURSE! PURSE! PURSE! Cormack looks annoyed but doesn't get in Purse's way too much. Purse climbs up the turnbuckle like he just had the most triumphant return ever and raises his arms, playing to the fans.
Freddy Whoa: He, uh... He didn't even get tagged in!
Zach Davis: Who cares, Freddy? He's Jeff Purse, and he's coming back to War! What more do you need!?
Jeff Purse continues to celebrate as Cormack shakes his head and leaves the ring and we go to commercial.
Television Title Match
Beat the Clock Challenge
Zombie McMorris vs Gemini Battle
Kyle Steel: THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL AND IS FOR THE TELEVISION TITLE AND THIS MATCH IS ALSO A BEAT THE CLOCK CHALLENGE MATCH...AND BY DECREE OF SETH LERCH...THIS MATCH HAS NO DISQUALIFICATIONS!!!!
Freddy Whoa: WOAH!
Kyle Steel: INTRODUCING FIRST...WEIGHING IN AT 220 LBS...ZOMBIE MCMORRIS!!!!!
" Killed By Death " hits the PA system as the arena begins to fill with smoke. Them vocals smash the speakers as the spot light is shown ZMAC whose stand out in the middle section of the area. He begins to walk down towards the ring then gets body surfed down to the crowd barrier. He hops the barrier and slides into the ring.
Zach Davis: Ladies and gentlemen, the sheer heat from this match could melt steel...Zombie McMorris..a man who by his own count has ended the careers of 16 wrestlers..He has killed men in battle...And now he faces a man he truly hates, OUR TELEVISION CHAMPION GEMINI BATTLE!
Kyle Steel: AND HIS OPPONENT! ALSO AT 220 LBS...GEMINI BATTLE!
“Falling Higher” by Helloween plays throughout the arena as Gemini Battle makes his way through the entrance curtain. The crowd cheers as he accepts the praise of the fans by slapping their hands, but never smiles as he heads to the ring. He slides under the bottom rope and slithers like a snake into the corner where he sits in the corner and meditates.
Zombie McMorris: HEY FAGGOT! HEY! I'M RIGHT HERE FAGGOT! GET OFF YOUR ASS!!!
Gemini Battle, looking slightly annoyed, signals for ZMAC to bring it. The bell rings...ZMAC charges right into a sitting upwards kick from Battle..ZMAC stumbles a bit as Gemini gets to his feet and starts firing shots at the head of ZMAC..But ZMAC counters...Rights and lefts flying..the crowd going crazy..The two fall to the ground..Rolling and punching each other until they roll right out of the ring onto the floor...ZMAC sits in mount, but Battle rolls him into the guard rail to escape.
Freddy Whoa: THIS IS PERSONAL NO DOUBT ABOUT IT! These guys have been going back and forth on social media and now, its come to a head!
Gemini stumbles to the ring stairs...ZMAC charges him..But Battle drops him with a toe hold sending ZMAC face first into the stairs....Battle grabs ZMAC by his hair and starts slamming his head into the stairs...After 3, ZMAC elbows Battle then chucks him into the ring post as he gets away from the stairs..Battle lands shoulder first, then slumps to the floor...ZMAC rolls Battle into the ring, then rolls in, gets up, and proceeds to stomp Battle on the head..The Ref tries to intervene but ZMAC Shoves him off, takes Battle by the hair and lays him throat first on the bottom rope, putting his boot on the neck and using the ropes for leverage..Battle Gasps for air..The referee is now physically trying to get McMorris off of Battle, but ZMAC shoves him away again and continues to apply pressure to the throat of Battle...
Zach Davis: Nothing the referee can do here to stop this sadistic individual! Seth making a statement by making this a No Disqualification Match!
Freddy Whoa: Well so much for Beat The Clock..These two just want to beat the hell out of each other!
ZMAC releases Battle, who is coughing..and Proceeds to kick him in the head...Battle slumps to the floor...Hanging on to the apron and is then met by a baseball slide that sends him flying into the guardrail...ZMAC wastes no time in search of weapons as he throws the timekeeper off his seat and grabs his chair...Just as he goes to swing the chair, Battle catches him in the gut with a shoulder..Battle uses the pause to kick the chair into the face of ZMAC, which sends him stumbling backwards...Battle gives chase to capitalize but..
Zach Davis: CHAIRSHOT BY ZMAC! Battle goes down!
ZMAC Drops the chair..Picks up Battle's limp body and hooks him in a front facelock...DDT..NO! Battle slipped out! ZMAC falls on the chair! Battle shakes the cobwebs off as ZMAC climbs to his knees...Now Battle has the chair...He raises it to the crowd..ZMAC stands up...
Zach Davis: He's still up! Whats it going to take????
Battle winds up and blasts ZMAC on the back with the chair...Battle takes the chair into the ring with him...Why would he do this? And why would he run against the opposite ropes? No way....
Zach Davis: OH MY GOD! BATTLE JUST HIT ZMAC WITH A SUICIDE DIVE USING THE CHAIR AS A SPEAR!
Freddy Whoa: I don't even know how...Lets see the replay...My God! The End of that chair hit ZMAC Square on the jaw and Battle crashed and Burned to make that happen!
Zach Davis: Both men are down! ZMAC maybe busted open...
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
The men recover, and somehow get to their feet..Battle goes to grab ZMAC but is met by a boot to the gut...ZMAC rolls Battle into the ring..He hooks Battle.DDT! Cover....2 Count as Battle gets the shoulder up...McMorris smiles as this means he gets to inflict more punishment...He takes Battle and runs him shoulder first into the ring post...Wasting no time..He rams Battle into the corner again...Then grabbing Battle, he scoops him up and slams him hard to the canvas...ZMAC Climbs to the top rope...Leaps...Senton.....
Zach Davis: GODS PARADOX!!!!! GODS PARADOX!!!!!! OUT OF NOWHERE IN MID AIR!!!!! BOTH MEN ARE DOWN!!!!
Battle crawls to the ropes...Pulls himself up with the crowd cheering...He climbs the turnbuckle facing the crowd...ZMAC appears out...Battle leaps...rotating perfectly through the air..as he completes his rotation..ZMAC awakens, and...
Freddy Whoa: FALCON PUNCH! UPPERCUT SENDS BATTLE TO THE MAT! COVER BY ZMAC!
Battle gets the shoulder up! ZMAC IS FURIOUS!!!!!!
ZMAC lifts Battle..hooks his arms...WORLD TOUR 69! The double arm spike DDT Sends Battle down in a heap! ZMAC for the cover...
Zach Davis: BATTLE KEEPS FIGHTING! ZMAC Now heading towards...HEY....
ZMAC proceeds to tear apart the top of the announce table..In the process, he has disconnected the microphones...Davis and Woah know better than to stick around and run behind the Timekeeper...Somehow Battle stirs in the ring...ZMAC climbs the apron and grabs Battle by his head...He hooks him in a standard suplex position...Battle punches ZMAC in the midsection...but ZMAC STILL GETS HIM VERTICAL....Battle kicks to get free...Slips Behind ZMAC....NAILS A LOW BLOW UPPERCUT Before slipping between ZMACs Legs, Grabbing them and running...Battle Performs a sitdown release powerbomb that sends ZMAC through the announce table.
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
Gemini Battle throws ZMAC into the ring. He slides in and waits for ZMAC to get to his feet.
Zach Davis: There it is... GOD'S PARADOX!
Gemini pins ZMAC.
The bell sounds as Gemini Battle gets to his feet.
Freddy Whoa: After that video Gemini Battle played earlier, you know Teddy Blaze would've been out here if he could've been! Medics have him in the back, making sure he's cleared for War. Too many medics. Almost as if someone paid them off to make sure Blaze couldn't get out here...
Zach Davis: You've gotta wonder what this means for Zombie McMorris. He's won everything there is to win - except War. How does he walk into this?
Freddy Whoa: Jay Omega walked in as a darkhorse, as does Zombie McMorris. You never know, Zach.
We go to commercial.
Adrian Archer/Damian Kaine vs Mikey eXtreme/Henry Spearman
Slam fades in from commercial break to see Henry Spearman and Mikey eXtreme in one corner, and Adrian Archer in the opposite.
Zach Davis: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome back to Slam, live from the Rupp Arena in Lexington, Kentucky. Up next, we have a strange match-up indeed. On one side, we have Henry Spearman and Mikey eXtreme, in the same team. Now, these two have been battling for some time, even with eXtreme ensuring that Spearman entered WAR at number 1.
Freddy Whoa: Spearman has done his fair share to add to the heat as well, using eXtreme’s very own super kick against him in a match. Mikey has been dead set on getting his revenge, Zach. Will we see it tonight?
Zach Davis: We’ll have to wait and see, Freddy. He might not get the chance to, though! Because on the other side, we have Adrian Archer and Damian Kaine.
Freddy Whoa: The two former brothers thrown together for a common goal. But, Zach, i think there is a good chance that Archer and Kaine will work together about as well as Seth Lerch and his Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor.
Five Finger Death Punch's cover of "Bad Company" plays over the speakers.
As the guitar opening plays, Damian slowly walks out.
"Company... Always on the run."
Damian falls to his knees, head bowed and hands brought together.
"Destiny.... Oh, it's the rising sun!"
He looks up the sky, arms out spread.
"I was born, a shotgun in my hand."
He makes finger-pistols toward the ring, staring down at the Davis and Whoa.
"Behind this gun, I'll make my final stand.. Yeah. That's why they call me...."
He stands up, head bowed.
He flips off his hood, and looks out to the crowd. He smirks, and runs to the ring, leaping to the apron, and grabbing the top rope, hooking his arm around it. He stares deep into Extreme's eyes and smiles, maniacally.
"My Dick" by Mickey Avalon hits..Nobody comes out at first, then after a bit Adrian Archer walks out smiling arms out..he struts to the ring chewing gum and smiling, doing a turn and pointing to the crowd. He walks by a sign that reads “Play Me Like a Slut Machine, Adrian!” He smiles, then rolls into the ring and plays to the crowd.
The four men stare each other down. The referee is trying to get somebody from each team to the outside. It winds up being Archer and Spearman to start things off.
The two get into a collar-and-elbow tie up, into an alternating upper hand, before Archer just knees Spearman in the stomach.
Archer continues kicking at Spearman while he’s down. The ref pulls him back. Adrian pushes him away and boots spearman in the head.
Archer takes to pandering to the crowd, while eXtreme slaps the back of an almost vertical Spearman, tagging himself in. eXtreme stalks Archer, then hits him with a clothesline when he turns around.
eXtreme heads to the top for a frog splash, but Kaine pushes him off before he jumps.
Kaine is holding his arm out for a tag, but Archer flat out refuses to. Archer walks over to extreme and picks him up before landing a picture perfect T-Bone Suplex.
Archer taunts a bit more, allowing Mikey the chance to get up.
Archer notices that eXtreme is on his feet, and goes rebounds off the rope for a flying forearm, but Kaine managed to tag himself in.
Kaine jumps in the ring, fired up. He ricochets of the ropes and splashes onto the downed eXtreme. He then stops and converses with Archer. The referee starts the count.
Archer proceeds to get out of the ring, then gets tagged by Kaine, coming right back in. Archer grabs eXtreme from behind, his arms locked around the waist.
Kaine hits Mikey with a hard superkick, leading to a german suplex from Archer for the pin!
eXtreme raises his shoulder off of the mat.
Zach Davis: Mass Extinction, shades of the Purge, perfectly executed, but not enough to put away the King.
Kaine gets back on the apron. Adrian argues with the ref a bit before getting back to kicking eXtreme.
Archer grabs the leg of eXtreme, trying for a single leg Boston crab, but eXtreme kicks Adrian in the stomach.
eXtreme gets up and drops Archer with a DDT. Mikey runs and ricochets off of the ropes, landing the eXtinguished. Archer is crawling to the corner… But Kaine is nowhere to be seen!
Zach Davis: Ladies and Gentlemen, Damian Kaine has collapsed to the ground below him. He is clutching his head and screaming. Guys, we have no Earthly idea what the hell is going on with Kaine.
Meanwhile in the ring, eXtreme has tagged in Spearman, and Spearman is stalking Archer for a spear. Archer gets up, and turns right into Spearman. Henry pins Archer.
Kyle Steel: Here is your winner, the team of Henry Spearman and Mikey eXtreme!
Henry raises his hands in victory, walking around the ring, before turning around to a spear from eXtreme. Mikey walks out, and is almost trampled by Damian Kaine sprinting to the back, still screaming and covering his head, as SLAM cuts to commercial.
Tag Team Titles Match
Jason Cash/Salem Shepard vs Tomohawk/Captain WCF
Zach Davis: Well.. That was just weird. Kaine just running to the back, like he was paranoid or something
Freddy Whoa: Yeah, I have to agree, Zack. I’m eager to find out what the hell just happened!
The lights in the arena go out as red lights and fog cover the ramp as Grazen Image by Zack Hemsey plays for several moments as he makes the crowd wait.
Kyle Steel: The following is a tag team match scheduled for one fall, and it is for the WCF Tag Team Championships! Introducing first, Salem Shepard!
Salem comes out with a sick smile on his face, eyes wide, with a large black bag on his side. Not pay attention to the fans as he walks to the ring.
Zach Davis: Now, if we want to talk more about weird, let’s look no further than Salem Shepard. Or any of Zero Tolerance, for that matter. Whether it be Crazy J or this man coming out right now.
Kyle Steel: And his tag team partner, from Braxton, Mississippi, weighing in at 255 pounds. Jason Cash!
Hillbilly Deluxe hits on the PA system. Jason Cash walks out of the curtain with a huge smirk across his face. He looks around to the crowd before taking a large drink of his beer. He then makes his way down to the ring. Once inside, he reaches into his boot and takes out his can of cherry skoal. He gets himself a dip and he is ready to fight.
The Doors’ “Roadhouse Blues” plays over the PA system.
Tomohawk slowly walks down to the ring, head swaying in time to the music. He steps up to the mat from the floor, and leans back against the top rope, backward-saulting into the ring over the rope. He centers himself in the ring and raises one hand high in the air.
Captain WCF runs from the back as soon as his music hits, straight to the ring and slides under the bottom rope. He then gets in the middle of the ring and does a super hero pose before running to his corner.
The Referee takes the title belts from Cap and Tomohawk and raises them high above his head before giving them to the timekeeper, who then rings the bell.
DING! DING! DING!
The match starts off with Tommy and Cash.
The two circle each other. After a few rotations, Cash decides he has had enough, and walks at Tommy.
Cash grabs Tomohawk and irish whips him into the ropes, bringing his boot up and laying the champion out flat.
Cash lands some mounted punches. At this time, Cap has gotten in the ring and hit Cash in the back, attempting to free his partner.
Cash gets up, and chases Cap out of the ring. However, Tommy has had time to recover at this point.
Cash goes to kick Tommy, but he moves out of the way, and lands sharp kicks to the legs of Jason Cash. Tomohawk runs to the ropes, and rebounds into a dropkick, taking down Cash.
Tomohawk heads to the top rope, jumping off, and landing a hard fist to Cash’s face.
Captain WCF is in the corner begging for a tag, but Tommy just ignores it for a little longer.
Tommy drops a knee onto Cash’s stomach.
Cap is jumping up and down on the apron now. Tommy caves and reaches for the tag. At the same time, Cash reaches Shepard and in comes the Schizo as well!
Salem stands their and picks Cap out of the air as the Cap tries to launch himself onto Salem.
Salem locks Cap in a bearhug then lands a belly to belly suplex into the turnbuckle. He picks Cap up off of the ground and traps him in the corner, tagging in Cash and issuing double mudhole stomps.
The ref starts the count to get Shepard out of the ring.
Salem finally gets on to the apron.
Cash is tossing Cap around like he’s paper. Cash makes the mistake of getting too close to Tomohawk and Tommy slaps Cap on the back without Cash noticing.
Tommy sits on the apron, waiting for Cash to turn back around. As soon as Cash does, Tommy springboards off the top rope with his famous lariat, Spirits Rising.
Cash gets up quickly, only to be caught by a flying shoulder tackle from Tommy. The crowd is getting behind Tomohawk as he continues picking up momentum. He runs to the ropes, ricocheting and hitting Cash square with a missile dropkick.
Tomohawk walks over to Cash and performs the Rain Dance, dancing around Cash before stomping every inch of his body.
Tommy starts to pick Cash up by his hair, but Cash spits his tobacco juice into Tommy’s eyes. Tommy takes a step back as Cash sets up for the superkick! BAM! Down goes Tomohawk with the Sweet Chin Juice. Cash tags in Shepard.
While Tomohawk is down, Shepard takes the time to grab his black bag from ringside. He unzips it and pulls out a Native American Headdress. He places it around his head.
Shepard proceeds to dance around the ring, in stereotypical Native fashion, then stops. He sees that Tommy is now to his hands and knees. Shep stares Tommy down, then raises one finger to the cheap seats of the arena. He stalks Tommy, then runs and punts Tommy’s head damn near right off of his shoulders.
Shep finds time to end the match, going up top for the Moon glorious. As soon as he reaches the top, however, a recovered Captain WCF runs down the apron and jumps, kicking Salem right in the back of the head. Cap heads up top for the Bonzai. He jumps, but Salem is up and out of the way…
Right into a Muay Thai buzzsaw kick by Tomohawk! Tommy sends Cap back up to the top again, for another Bonzai attempt. Tommy goes and hits a Talon strike on Cash on the apron, causing him to fall to the floor.
Cap finally makes it to the top, and sees Salem down, almost lifeless. He jumps once more, and successfully lands the Bonzai.
He pins Salem.
Cash tries to slide in the ring, but its too late.
Kyle Steel: Ladies and Gentlemen, the winners of this match, by way of Pinfall, and STILL the WCF Tag Team Champions, the team of Tomohawk, and Captain WCF!
Freddy Whoa: WHOA!
The crowd pops!
Zach Davis: WHAT AN UPSET! I mean, I know they're the Champs, but WOW!
Tomohawk and Captain WCF embrace briefly in the ring before grabbing their Titles and rolling out. Cash joins Shepard in the ring.
Freddy Whoa: Just like that, Zach! Anything can happen in the WCF - including two men like Tomohawk and Captain WCF coming together to defeat a team that has been steamrolling the entire WCF!
Tomohawk and Captain WCF celebrate midway up the ramp. Salem Shepard and Jason Cash stand up in the ring, yelling towards them that this isn't over.
Zach Davis: Can you imagine someone like Captain WCF winning War!? Mr. WCF, Logan, has done it a bunch of times... but CAPTAIN WCF!?
Freddy Whoa: Or will this motivate Zero Tolerance to reach greater heights than before? Forget the Tag Team Titles battle.. maybe one of these men is out to win War after tonight!
We go to commercial.
Corey Black vs Dion Necurat
Kyle Steel: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Minneapolis, Minnesota: Dion Neucrat!
Dion enters at the beginning of the verse to "Battle Metal." He raises his free arm to the crowd, then focuses his attention to the ring. He walks down the ramp, not taking his eyes off his opponent(s). Before entering the ring, Dion removes the shield from his arm, setting it aside against the ring steps. Dion slides into the ring, raising an arm in the air. He then walks over to his corner, mentally preparing for the match.
Kyle Steel: And his opponent: Corey Black!
"The Way of Vikings" by Amon Amarth hits the PA as the lights drop and purple lights illuminate the arena. A few moments later Corey Black emerges from the backstage area wearing a black leather vest and with Nikki Venus by his side. The crowd cheers along with great appreciation as Corey and Nikki make their way to the ring. Black slides in while Nikki takes her place in his corner on the floor. Corey drops his vest to her and simply waits in the corner as the crowd cheers.
DING! DING! DING!
Dion charges at Black, expecting a clothesline. Black ducks under Dion’s arm, and hits him hard in the stomach. With Necurat bent over, Black drops an elbow on his spinal cord, taking him to the mat.
Black tries to end it early with a single leg Boston crab to no avail, as Necurat manages to get to the bottom rope. Black continues to pummel Necurat with stomps and forearms.
He runs to the ropes, bounces back, and lands a missile dropkick to Necurat’s face. He gets Dion up, and tosses him to the ropes. Off the rebound, Black delivers a hard kick to Necurat’s face… Wait……
Zach Davis: BATES BOOT! BLACK JUST USED TUB’S OWN FINISHER TO END OFF NECURAT!
To finish him off, Black rests his boot on Necurat’s chest for the pin.
Freddy Whoa: THE NOOB KILLER STRIKES AGAIN!
Zach Davis: Why doesn't he get out his banhammer while he's at it?
The fans boo.
Kyle Steel: Here is your winner, Corey Black!
Corey reaches for Kyle’s mic.
Corey Black: Thomas, that was your warning. The belt is mine come War! For the past fifteen years, only one man has steered the course of WCF history... and that was me. Throughout history, Corey Black was here. Be it the Team of Treachery, Pantheon, and sure as fuck beyond the DRG.... Corey Black was part of it all, and controlled it all. Thomas Uriel Bates? You control nothing. You are the latest cog in a series of removable, interchangable pieces, fluctuating around the one constant in WCF, the one ever-persistent, never changing: Corey fucking Black.
Black then walks to the back, passing Damian Kaine, who is running to the ring.
Freddy Whoa: What the hell is Kaine doing out here? After what happened earlier tonight, he should be in a mental ward again!
Kaine gets Necurat up and helps him to the back.
Thomas Uriel Bates Segment
Corey Black sits in his locker room upon a regal throne, surrounded by banners and crests all paying tribute to his career. He rests comfortably on the throne, wearing his jagged crown and his red velvet cape adorned with gold medallions. He rests comfortably that is, until the doors explode.
The doors shatter into pieces, sending wooden and metal shrapnel across the room and startling the King of all Wrestlers. The Mountain of WCF steps through the doorway with his fierce eyes focused on Corey Black. Corey tries to remain composed, as if unfazed by the interruption. Thomas Uriel Bates however steps forward and grabs the legend by the collars of his cape. He lifts Corey Black up, forcing the jagged crown to fall. Bates sends his forehead into Corey Black’s face, instantly splattering blood across the room, and sending Corey Black to the floor sliding against the wall.
Bates grabs Corey’s head and lifts him up. He sends a knee in the legend’s stomach, hitting with a strength not unlike a battering ram. Corey doubles over in pain, allowing the mountain to set him up with gutwrench powerbomb right into a nearby table. Bates is unrelenting in his attack, and kneels down to deliver a series of punches and elbows to Corey’s face.
He stops, and drags Corey Black towards the throne by his hair. He grabs hold of his neck, and picks him up. Bates then lifts him in a reverse fireman’s carry, and drops him with The Burning Hammer right through the gold and jeweled adorned wooden throne. Corey Black is not moving, but the monstrous mountain mounts anyway, and again deliver a series of punches and elbow strikes.
Dozens, if not more, Security men rush into the room and try their best to pull the giant off of Corey Black. They only succeed in slowing the monster down at first, before he finally relents his attack and stands. Thomas Uriel Bates allows security to escort him out of the room as more security and medics rush to the aid of the broken Corey Black.
Thomas Uriel Bates/CJ Phoenix vs Kevin Bishop/Psychopomp
Kyle Steel: The following contest is our Main Event, and it is a tag team contest scheduled for one fall!
The lights in the arena go black and a hush falls upon the fans when the tron lights up pure white. “Unholy Confessions” by Avenged Sevenfold blares over head and white
strobes beam down on a group of people in black hoods and Plague doctor masks, as the lights beam down on them, they move away to reveal The Plague Kevin Bishop and Psychopomp
holding out their arms taking in the roar of the crowd. Plague wears his black studded leather vest and his hair drips wet as he shakes his head to the music. Psychopomp is wearing a whole
new set of long white pants with 'Brotherhood' written out in red on his right leg and matching new red boxing tape up to his elbows. Kevin applies his wrist tape as
they makes their way down the ramp with two of Plague's followers closely behind them while the fans are reaching out to them.
Kyle Steel: Making their way to the ring, representing The Brotherhood, at a combined weight of 468lbs, Psychopomp and the WCF People's Champion, Kevin Bishop!
Bishop and Pomp make their way towards the end of the ramp. They run to the ring
and slide in. Kevin stands in the middle of the ring with Pomp and with a grin on his face he takes in the roaring of the crowd. He turns around and gives a nod of approval to the two masked men
and they quickly pull back their hoods and masks to reveal Damian Kaine and a bruised Dion Necurat! They both jump up and down in the ring as the fans goes wild at the sight of the new members
of the Brotherhood!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa! It's Damian Kaine and Dion Necurat! The Brotherhood is spreading!
The People's champion finally lifts his arms and a barrage of sparks rain down onto him and the ring. He makes his way to the far corner and they await their opponents and the two new brothers slide down to stay at ringside.
Zach Davis: Definitely a fearsome sight in front of us with these four men.
"Re-education Through Labor" begins to play as the cameras pan through the crowd. Then, 13 seconds into the song, Phoenix runs out onto the stage as the beat drops. He stretches his arms out as he looks at the crowd before running down the ramp with his arms stretched out and flames following him on each side until he reaches the end of the ramp.
Kyle Steel: Introducing their opponents. First, from Baton Rouge, Louisiana, weighing in at 205lbs, he is the WCF Alpha Champion, CJ Phoenix!
He slides into the ring and runs up one of the turnbuckles. He then does a cross sign with his hands before pointing upward and hopping off the turnbuckle into the ring.
Zach Davis: CJ Phoenix might be in a lot of trouble here tonight, Freddy.
Freddy Whoa: That's right, Zach, but he still has the World Champion on his side, though not at 100%
Zach Davis: And that might be the difference maker.
“Midnight Rider” by the Allman Brothers Band blares over the PA system as the titantron begins showing clips of Thomas Uriel Bates riding his motorcycle along a deserted highway, then images of previous matches against legends and superstars of the WCF, ending with him holding the WCF World Championship in the air at WCF Revenge.
Freddy Whoa: Speaking of the WCF Champion of the World, here he comes!
As the video continues to play, Thomas Uriel Bates steps out to the stage wearing his wrestling attire, and holding the WCF World Championship on his shoulder.
Kyle Steel: Making his way to the ring, weighing in at four hundred and thirty pounds and standing at six foot, nine inches. From Huntsville, Alabama, the Mountain of WCF, the WCF World Champion; Thomas Uriel Bates!
Bates glares down at the ring, staring intensely at The Brotherhood as he walks to the ring. He arrives at the ring and walks up the steps. He moves to the center of the apron, and keeping his eyes centered on his opponents, he steps over the top rope and enters the ring. Bates steps towards Bishop and Pomp and stretches out his arms, and roars. The crowd joins in, amplifying the thunderous effect.
Zach Davis: He's bandaged, he's bruised up, but he's still competing!
Freddy Whoa: That just shows how tough of a competitor he is!
CJ Phoenix and Kevin Bishop start the match for their respective teams.
*DING DING DING*
Zach Davis: These two have been in every main event match this month. They've been really impressive, and they're sharing the spotlight once again tonight.
Freddy Whoa: They claim to be racing each other to the top of the WCF, and this looks to be the next chapter in this rivalry.
Zach Davis: Here's the tie up. Looks to be pretty even right now. Bishop looking to use his power to take control. Phoenix looking to capitalize on his speed advantage.
Freddy Whoa: Bates and Pomp watching as the two men in the ring are exchanging counters. It's like looking at a chess match, except more interesting.
Kevin Bishop appears to take the early advantage. He goes to fight Phoenix into the turnbuckle where Psychopomp is, but CJ slips out and sends Bishop into the turnbuckle. CJ then follows up with an Enziguri as The Plague rebounds from the ropes. Phoenix keeps Kevin off guard by hitting him with a running DDT as soon as he gets up. CJ finishes his combo of moves with a standing moonsault into a pin.
Zach Davis: Way too early for this one to be over Freddy.
Freddy Whoa: Absolutely, but CJ's definitely on fire right now.
Phoenix dishes out some mounted punches. Then, he lifts Bishop to his feet, and The Plague responds by grabbing him and taking him down with a snap brainbuster. Kevin brings CJ toward Psychopomp.
Freddy Whoa: Tag made and now Pomp is the legal man for the first time tonight.
Zach Davis: It looks like they're setting up for a tandem attack. Bishop going for a German Suplex, and Pomp compliments it with a Stargazer!
Freddy Whoa: I believe they call that one the Eclipsing Stargazer!
Zach Davis: It might be called the end of the match as CJ's shoulders are on the mat!
Zach Davis: CJ Phoenix stays in the match as the count only reaches two.
Psychopomp makes his way to the second rope and dives onto Phoenix with a diving elbow. He then follows this up by putting him in the surfboard stretch. CJ struggles to break free as every second he's end the hold drains his strength. Eventually, he musters up just enough force to break the hold. Pomp, not happy with this, goes for a springboard moonsault from the second rope, but CJ rolls out of the way. Meanwhile, Thomas Bates starts slapping the top of the turnbuckle.
Zach Davis: Bates wants into this match badly and CJ Phoenix needs to get out of there!
Freddy Whoa: Yeah, but Pomp isn't gonna let him. He's got the leg. Enziguri from Phoenix!
Zach Davis: Pyschopomp tags in Kevin Bishop, and CJ makes it to Bates! Tag made! Here comes the World Champion!
Freddy Whoa: The World Champ is exploding with offense right now as he takes down the People's Champion with a vicious array of European uppercuts!
Bates sends Bishop into the ropes and floors him with a big boot when he rebounds. The WCF Galaxy erupts with cheers as he has turned the tide in the match. He attempts a pin.
Zach Davis: Kevin Bishop kicks out at two as momentum has shifted once more in this one.
Freddy Whoa: Thomas looking to bring The Plague to his feet, oh no!
Zach Davis: Bishop, out of instinct, hitting the world Champ on his head right where the bandages are.
As Kevin gets to his feet, the ref checks on TUB. Bishop decides to lean on the ropes and wait to see if Bates can still compete. Once it's acknowledged that he can, he goes into a tie up after the World Champ gets to a vertical base. Thomas overpowers him and sends him to the ropes once more. However, this time, Bishop kicks him in the stomach, dropping Bates to a knee as he holds his stomach and takes a few deep breaths. After hesitating for a moment, Bishop goes for a DDT, but Bates escapes, lifts The Plague high in the air, and sends him crashing down with a thunderous spinebuster.
Freddy Whoa: What a counter by Thomas Uriel Bates!
Zach Davis: Yeah, but it did damage to Bates as well. Both men on the ground as their tag partners are eager to get back in this one. The crowd on their feet as each man is inching towards his respective corner.
Freddy Whoa: They're almost there. Tag to Pomp! Tag to Phoenix! Here we go!
CJ Phoenix and Psychopomp enter the ring and immediately trade strikes at the center, resulting in a quick stalemate. Pomp counters a strike from CJ and starts attacking him with chops. He then sends Phoenix to the ropes and hits him with a kitchen sink when he comes back. Pomp attempts a pin.
Zach Davis: Phoenix gets the shoulder up at two!
Freddy Whoa: What's Pomp thinking here? He's taking a few steps back.
Zach Davis: I think he wants to send CJ Phoenix Stargazing.
Freddy Whoa: CJ struggling to stand up here, and Pomp's going for it...whoa! Spear from Phoenix! Cover!
Zach Davis: Kevin Bishop saving the match for The Brotherhood as Dion Necurat and Damian Kaine watch from the sidelines!
Freddy Whoa: Kevin's not done yet. Black Death! Black Death to CJ Phoenix. Bishop dragging his partner's arm across CJ Phoenix.
Zach Davis: What!? How did he kick out of that!?
Freddy Whoa: I have no clue, Zach! Pomp and Bishop definitely working well as a team, but you gotta give props to Thomas Uriel Bates and CJ Phoenix. Both of those guys are showing inhumane amounts of toughness tonight!
Kevin thinks for a moment before helping Pomp to his feet. He then steps between the ropes to break the ref's five count before stepping back in the ring. He uplifts CJ Phoenix.
Zach Davis: He's got him in German suplex position again! Pomp ascending the ropes! They're going for the PsychoPlague Combo of Doom!
Freddy Whoa: Here we go! One German! Two Germans!
Zach Davis: Phoenix tagged in Bates on the way down! I don't think anyone but the ref saw it!
Freddy Whoa: Three German Suplexes! And now the Sacrament! Pomp going for the pin!
Zach Davis: Yeah, but CJ's no longer the legal man!
Freddy Whoa: I think Bishop realizes this. He's going for Bates...WHOA!
Zach Davis: Bates caught him, and now the Memphis Giant Slam onto Pomp and Phoenix!
Freddy Whoa: What a move by the World Champion, but it took a lot of him again! Can he get to his feet!?
CROWD: WCF! WCF! WCF!
CJ Phoenix was shoved into the ref. Corey Black is in the ring.
Zach Davis: BATES BOOT TO .... BATES!
Even after all that, the war between the two WCF mainstay continues; Corey hits the boot! Psychopomp is on the top rop.
Freddy Whoa: THE SACRAMENT!
Pomp is on top of the WCF World Champion and the ref makes the count.
Zach Davis: PSYCHOPOMP WINS IT!
The bell sounds. Thomas Uriel Bates rolls out of the ring as Kevin Bishop joins Psychopomp; he's quickly joined by Dion Necurat and Damian Kaine.
Freddy Whoa: At the end of the night, tonight... very clearly..... The Brotherhood is standing tall.
Zach Davis: Can you imagine if it is Kevin Bishop standing tall after War!? Or.. hell.. after this.. Psychopomp!?
Freddy Whoa: This really is the most unpredictable War in history.
One Last War Entrant
As the dust settles from thrilling clash, the four superstars are collecting themselves in the ring and at ringside, the crowd rises to their feet to cheer the efforts.
Zach Davis: Another epic clash setting up what is fixing to be an incredible War event, three of these men will be competing to take the biggest win of their career and head into One as the number one contender. Will they meet the impassable mountain there? Or can WCF Hall of Famer Corey Black recapture the World Title for the first time in years?
Freddy Whoa: Not to forget the clash between Gemini Battle and Teddy Blaze in what promises to be an emotionally charged brawl. I for one can’t wait.
Zach Davis: The fans are ready, the boys are ready, are you ready? It’s Wa-
The lights in the arena cut and we are bathed in darkness as the crowd give a perfunctory cheer.
Zach Davis: What now?!
Ten seconds or so pass before the big screen is lit with two words. The crowd scream in a metronomic chorus of ecstasy, relief and surprise.
Crowd: THE WORLD!!!!!
The ring lights illuminate again and the delirium reaches fever pitch as the crowd goes absolutely apeshit. Father's forget they are carrying babies, beers are thrown, people are shaking like they are possessed by the holy fucking ghost in this bitch as we focus on the man stood in the centre of the ring as he scans across the four bodies strewn around ringside.
Zach Davis: HOLY SHIT!
Freddy Whoa: Whoa.
Zach Davis: IT’S JOEY FUCKING FLASH!!!!!!
Garbed in his traditional white trunks and boots, his long raven hair flowing down his back and with the biggest smile on his face stands the erstwhile World Champion, microphone in hand. He bathes in the adoration of the crowd for a moment, before holding a hand outward to quiet the crowd like Caesar himself at the Colosseum. The crowd obeys and falls into a hushed silence as Joseph raises the microphone to his mouth.
Joey Flash: Miss me?
The crowd explode in joy once more with a handful of low pitched boos creeping through.
Joey Flash: Well I didn’t miss you faggots.
This doesn’t dissuade the crowd, who continue the room shaking noise.
Crowd: WELCOME BACK! WELCOME BACK! WELCOME BACK!
Joey’s smile grows even larger.
Joey Flash: I’ve been away from the ring for what? Five months? I’ve not so much as stepped foot in a wrestling ring since what happened in Mexico - I’ve been...indisposed. Bullshit right? I’ve only been back in training for a month but I’m getting there.
The crowd cheers once more.
Joey Flash: Calm the fuck down, don’t cheer me just for training. See, I felt the snap coming back, I’m getting my lungs back - all the menial shit and then I have a looksee what options I have. I am still under contract with WCF, I looked that shit over and I’m contracted until 31st of December 2016. Interesting right? I have essentially three months before I either re-up or fuck off.
I could just sit idly by and keep collecting my check as the highest paid superstar in the federation - or I could enter the ring and do what every true professional would do. Fucking earn it.
So I decided, sorry, gonna sit at home and collect the money. Ciao.
He motions with the microphone as to drop it before whipping it back to speak.
Joey Flash: Ahh who am I kidding. You already know why I’m here, I’ve come to collect what’s mine.
He waits for a moment before pointing at the fallen Thomas Uriel Bates.
Joey Flash: Thanks so much for being a placeholder ya fat fuck. I’ll be taking what’s mine from Corey at One.
Zach Davis: Does that mean…
Joey points his microphone toward Zach Davis.
Joey Flash: YES ZACH IT DOES! I’m going to win War.
The crowd explodes in glee and excitement once more.
Joey Flash: I step through these ropes feeling sick and dirty at what this great place has devolved to. Thomas Bates, while you lay there, hopefully as uncomfortable as you possibly can be, I want you to listen to me.
I don’t hate you, Tom. I don’t even dislike you. I do like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back - I don’t even know these motherfuckers. Fucking Zoey Ryback?! Someone feed that fat bitch less. What even is this place now? It’s pathetic.
What I hate Thomas, is that YOU, you, fucking midcard filler shit are now considered “the best.” Because you’re not. You’re not even top ten in the world, I can name fifteen people better than you. Of all the top tens in the world, there is a name synonymous with the position of #1 - Joey Flash.
History has a strange way of being rewritten here, but let’s be real here. I’m the best in the world. There’s one thing you’re better at than I am and that’s kissing Seth Lerch’s ass. You’re as good as kissing Seth Lerch’s ass as ICE Beckman was. I don’t know if you’re as good as Logan though. He’s a pretty good ass kisser. Always was and still is.
Whoops! I’m breaking the fourth wall! Look Odin, aren’t you proud?
I am the best wrestler in the world.
I’ve been the best since day one when I walked into this company and I’ve been vilified and hated since that day because Charles Plumlee saw something in me that nobody else wanted to admit. That’s right, I’m a Torture guy. You know who else was a Torture guy? Jayson Price. And he split just like I’m probably splitting. But the biggest difference between me and Jayson is I’m going to leave with the WCF Championship.
I’m going to win War. I’m going to beat whoever the WCF World Champion is at One and I’m going to leave with the WCF Championship on January 1st. Fuck it who knows right? Maybe I’ll go defend it at Old School Wrestling. Maybe…I’ll defend it in Universal Championship Infinite.
Flash waves at the camera.
Joey Flash: Hey Howie, how you doing?
Seth. You are going to be the downfall of this company - you constantly back the wrong horse. Time and time again, it’s always the way. The world turns and Seth costs himself money and mortgages the future of this business for a bullshit flight of fancy. No more. I’m not going to accept this any more. Seth is a success despite himself, even now the company could be doing better, could be pushing new talent and creating new stars and preparing a legacy, but he isn’t. Why? Because he surrounds himself with glad-handed, nonsensical, douchebag yes men like Jeff Purse, who’s going to tell him everything he wants to hear,and I’d like to think that maybe this company will better after Seth is dead. But the fact is, it’s going to be taken over by his idiotic lapdog Bates and his doofus gopher Sarah Twilight and the rest of his boot licking human nut rag group.
Let me tell you a personal story about Seth Lerch alright? We do this whole ‘No Dick Pic’ campaign we-
As Joey continues to speak the microphone is cut and we see an incredulous Flash nod with a wry smile of acceptance. He holds his arms out to rowdy cheers from the raucous crowd.
Zach Davis: Well...I think Joey Flash has just declared War on Seth Lerch and the WCF as a whole.
Freddy Whoa: This isn’t good. This isn’t good at all.
Zach Davis: We head to Madison Square Garden in two weeks for the biggest match in the WCF Calendar year. Not only do we have so many amazing competitors and legends competing but now this - this stakes are raised tenfold. What could possibly happen when all these forces collide in two weeks time?
Freddy Whoa: This is Flash’s home turf, the atmosphere is going to be absolutely toxic...and I can’t wait!
Zach Davis: If you needed any more incentive to buy this PPV, I think you are already on the way to find your bank details. See you in two weeks folks!
Several minutes too late, Slam fades to black.